He was never supposed to be chosen
by The Lonely Geek
Summary: SYOT closed. Sapphire Glart has always wanted to volunteer for the hunger games, so she does. But then it all got wrong when her brother was reaped and no one volunteered for him. (Terrible at summaries sorry) Rated for violence and mature topics later on.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I really hope you enjoy. The SYOT forms are at the bottom just PM me with them answered to enter, or leave it in the reviews. You can only enter two tributes and they cannot from the career districts (as I have already planned them) or the District 7 male (again I have planned him).Good luck, and I hope you enjoy the first chapter. Please review.**

The finishing line is so near, yet so far. I use the last of my strength to throw a knife, it barely scrapes his arm. We're doing this deliberately. I'm not going to let him lose. Then he throws a spear, it's quite an easy one to dodge. I think he meant me to, but I had no strength to roll out of the way. It lodges in my stomach, not too deep though. Blood gushes out of the wound like a waterfall, it drips into the stream, turning it a pale pink. At least I'll die looking at something beautiful. I only wanted to make my family respect me, make my district proud. He was never supposed to be reaped.

I am standing amongst a group of girls, all about my age. Some looked terrified. I'm not though. This year will finally be my year. This year I will be a tribute. I've wanted to do it ever since I was five and my sister Kaya was in her first reaping, her name was called out, but an older girl volunteered for her. Kaya visited her before she left, apparently she was going to start working in the mines soon, but she was very claustrophobic, and hated the idea of being miles underground in the dark, dank mines. If she hadn't volunteered, she would have gone crazy and committed suicide. She said if she won the games she would be rich and wouldn't need to work in the mines anyway. If she didn't the outcome would be the same anyway. She died in the first half hour of the games. I zone back in as Stella Willond read the name of the female tribute out

"Zoey Slater." She called into the microphone. I recognise the name – it's my thirteen year old brother's girlfriend. She stumbles onto the stage, petrified. I look at my brother. His eyes are wild with anger. A tear spills from his eyes. I haven't told my family I'm going to do this. "Any volunteers?" Stella asked. I step forwards.

"I volunteer." I shout. Zoey looked over at me and shook her head, but I smile weakly at her as she is led down the stage, while I am led up the stage by a group of peacekeepers.

"A volunteer." Stella states the obvious "And what's your name?" She shoves the microphone in my face.

"Sapphire Glart." I say, scanning the crowd.

"Well let's put a hand together for Sapphire, female tribute for District 1, and volunteer." The crowd erupt into applause, they think I'm brave, courageous. "Now for the male tribute." She rummages in the glass bowl full of paper slips. "Carter Glart." She reads out. What? No! He wasn't supposed to be called. This was never supposed to happen. My brother and I were never supposed to go against each other. Carter looks stunned as he is led up to the stage. "Any volunteers?" Pleae let there be one. Silence. "Well I'd bet my buttons you're Sapphire's brother."

"Yes." He replied dully.

"Well shake hands!" We reach across and shake hands, and I look at him close up. His hair is for once out of his eyes, combed back in honour of the reaping. His green eyes are as bright as a cat's, and they are starting to water. And I know, we both know, we'll never be able to kill each other. "I present the District 1 tributes for the 63rd hunger games, Sapphire Glart and Carter Glart. Happy hunger games and may the odds be ever in your favour."

 **SYOT Form:**

 **District:  
Gender:  
Age:  
Full name:  
Background (family, what their life is like etc.:  
Volunteer or not:  
Additional information:**


	2. Chapter 2

**Another update. Woo! The SYOT is still open, the form is at the bottom of chapter 1, just PM me it completed or leave it in the reviews. I still need tributes from: 3,5,7 (female only), 8, 9, 10, 11 and 12. Hope you enjoy the chapter and please leave a review, good or bad.**

 **Chapter 2**

We are led off the stage and to separate locked rooms, where we have an hour to say our goodbyes. I hear muffled voices from Carter's room. I sit down and wait, then the door is unlocked, Zoey walks in.

"I'm so sorry." I blurt out, as she hugs me.

"It's not your fault." She comforts "But if it comes down to it, do it quickly, painlessly. He can't suffer." I shook my head.

"I would never kill Carter." I say. She just smiles weakly, and hands me a photo of my family, she puts a finger to her lips. I smiled and put it in my shoe. To remind me of them when I'm in the arena. I'm allowed something to take into the arena, but me mentor will have sorted it out so it's a disguised weapon of some sort.

"I have to go." Tears are streaming down her face, as we have one last embrace, before she slips out the door. Soon my parents walk in. They look at me.

"One of you has to make it." My mum says it's an order, I have to obey. I nod.

"I didn't mean for this." I say "Carter shouldn't have been picked, I had the tesserae. His name was only in there twice." I blurt.

"We know." My dad comforts. Then we sit there hugging, until they have to say goodbye to Carter.

"So what's your strategy?" Rose, my mentor, walks in. She won the games by filling up three two litre bottles and then poisoning the only water source.

"I don't know." I say, then I add "Ally with the other careers."

"Okay, now we need to make sure you get a high training score so they know not to mess with you. What are your strengths?" She asks.

"Knife throwing, I can do it with both hands." I shrug "I've been practising since I was six, but I broke my right hand when I was twelve so I learnt how to do it with my left too."

"That's good, now no offence, but you look pretty weak so during training I'd advise doing some weights and some spear throwing. Also spend a few hours on survival skills." I nod "Do you have a token?" I shake my head. She holds out a diamond hair slide, "Good, all volunteers get some variation of this." I take it "Twist it and the point becomes poisoned until it's untwisted again." She whispers. I grin. "Your hour's nearly up, I'll see you on the train." Then she's gone.

"P-p-please." I beg "P-please m-make it q-q-q," I stammer "Quick" I know I don't have long left to live, but the pain. It's so bad. "Ca-Carter, it-it hu-hurts. I-if y-you e-ever." I don't have any more strength left. I see his face, almost for the first time since the first day. Tears glisten in his eyes, he pulls the spear out, and tries to staunch the flow of blood. He gives me some bread. "J-just d-do it." I murmur "I-I forgive you. I will always a-and c-comp-completely f-forgive you. One of us has to d-die." He stops.

"You may be able to forgive me," He says "But I wouldn't." Then he leans over and kisses my forehead, and I hear the cannon. The final cannon. And I only know one thing: it's not mine.

"Hey." I say to Carter as we get led onto the train. He just looks at me.

"Thank you, for volunteering, for her. Zoey." He says, tears forming.

"I'm sorry I couldn't have volunteered for you." I start crying, as Rose and Hecate, Carter's mentor, walk in.

"Sit down, we need to discuss strategies." Hecate orders. Carter and I simultaneously flop into armchairs.

"Can we watch the other reapings, so I don't end up saying I'll ally with a bunch of twelve year olds?" I request.

"Okay, good idea." Rose says, and presses a few buttons on a control, a screen lights up and shows us the reapings. The other career districts both have volunteers. Both the male and female for both look lethal.

"Ally with two and four." I say "If we're decent in training it's more than likely that they'll agree"

"Then what?" Hecate asks, Carter shrugs.

"We kill."

"I don't really think we can plan for that far ahead. We have no idea what the arena will be like." Rose sighs.

"Fine, we'll leave it for now. You two may as well enjoy the food here while you can."


	3. Chapter 3

**Another chapter done. Woooo! There are still places in the SYOT for Districts: 3,5,8,9,10 and 11. I will put the SYOT form at the bottom of this chapter too to make it less effort than going back to chapter 1. Remember each person can have two entries each. I'm sorry but now half terms over I won't be able to update this as often as I have been, I'll try for once a week but no promises. I would like to know whether you would like less frequent, but longer updates, or shorter more frequent updates? Leave your answer in the reviews please, and tell me what you thought of this chapter. I hope you enjoy.**

 **Chapter 3**

The next morning I wake up early so I watch the sun rise. The sky is on fire. A pretty orangey pink colour. It Is almost worth coming here, I think to see this. Then I make my way to the buffet car.

"Morning." I say to Rose.

"Morning," She yawns "I'm going to run through some scenarios with you and see if you get killed or not. Okay?" I nod, grabbing a bread roll. "You're in a desert and you have the choice between a sleeping bag and knives, there is no shelter, which do you choose?"

"Sleeping bag, in a desert, you'd be looking at freezing nights and in a desert the only thing I'd be able to kill with knives is people. I can kill them with my bare hands." I reply. Rose smiles.

"Very good, you haven't died. Yet." I take a bite out of my bread roll. Mmm. Food here is good. "Now you are in a mountainous region and the only weapon you have is a blunt spear, you can see an aggressive looking bear, but it hasn't seen you yet." I'm about to open my mouth, but stop to process all the information.

"How far is the bear from me?" I ask, before giving my answer. Hecate comes in.

"About ten meters away, but you are on a ledge above it." She replies .

"Pick up a stone, and chuck it in another direction so it follows that. Then wait a few minutes and go in the opposite direction, then try and find a stream to confuse my scent, if it does come back to me." I reply now tipping some lamb stew into my bowl. Hecate looks impressed.

"Smarter than most tributes we get. Most of them are brawn not brain." He says.

"Last one," Rose begins "On one half of the arena there is a volcano, it's rocky and barren, on the other side, a bright colourful jungle with lots of plants and animals. Where do you go?"

"What animals?"

"Monkeys, rodents, birds." She answers. I take a spoonful of stew. It's amazing all the flavours jump out at you.

"Volcano, if it's rocky there's no sign of it erupting, but stay close to the jungle to hunt for food and in case the volcano does erupt."

"Well done. Why not the jungle?" Hecate asked.

"Poisonous plants, most people would go there. It'd be way more dangerous." I reply, having another spoonful.

"Congratulations, you shouldn't get killed by the environment, just don't get killed by the other tributes." Rose says.

"I'd like to see them try." I mutter. Rose and Hecate laughed.

"Now the other thing we need to discuss, is how we're going to present you." I grin, I'd already thought about this.

"Well, you know the girl I volunteered for?" I ask, while they nod "She's actually Carter's girlfriend. I was already going to volunteer, but no one else knows that." Rose smiles.

"Go on."

"So I think I should be presented as a heroic sister that was only trying to help her brother, but her brother was tragically pulled out at the reaping."

"Excellent, and we can present Carter as the heartbroken brother who has to face the choice between dying or his sister dying." Hecate replied.

"The Capitol live for stories like that." Rose snorted.

"Stories like what?" Carter asked, finally emerging into the buffet car.

"We were just discussing how to get you two sponsors. They drink up stories like this: sister volunteers for brother's girlfriend. Brother is forced to choose between his life and sister's life." Hecate answered.

"That's no choice. I'd never kill Sapphy." He grabbed a roll and ripped a huge hunk off with his teeth.

"Unless you're practising ripping someone's throat out with your teeth, I suggest you improve your manners," He chewed the bread slower, scowling at me. "Is it okay if I finish this in my car? I'm kinda tired." Rose and Hecate shrug, and I take this to mean yes. I pick my bowl up and refill it, then grab a mug and fill it with a piping hot, sweet drink that is called 'Hot Chocolate'. An avox comes over and picks them up for me and walks to my car. I grab a late of pastries and follow her. "Thanks," I say, smiling at her, she smiles back. I wonder why she's an avox. "Excuse me," I say grabbing her a pen and paper "I know I'm not supposed to ask, but what's your name?" She takes the paper and pen and swiftly writes:

'Daisy'

"I like it," I smile, she smiles again "There's a meadow near to the mines in District 1 that has dozens and dozens of daisies. It's only flower in the field, I think it's beautiful."

'You're the first one that's ever been kind to me since…" The text trails off.

"You became an aovx?" I finish, and Daisy nods. "Do you mind if I ask you why you became an avox?" Tears well up in her eyes "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked." I say, stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Of course it upset her.

'No it's fine. About five years ago, a group of people from my factory decided to strike, I wasn't one of them, but to scare others, they punished us all.' She wrote, a tear fell off her nose and splashed the paper.

"You don't have to go on." I whisper, she shakes her head.

'I want to. You're the only to ever bother asking. They whipped all of us, the ones who striked were whipped to death. Then they came up with punishments for the rest of us. I was one of the lucky ones.'

"I am so sorry." I say holding her as hot, salty tears stream down her face, like a waterfall.

'I should go.' She dries her cheeks and walks out. I finish my breakfast in silence, watching the blurred trees and lakes go past, wondering how some people have so much and some people have so little.

 **SYOT Form:**

 **District:** **  
** **Gender:** **  
** **Age:** **  
** **Full name:** **  
** **Background (family, what their life is like etc.):** **  
** **Volunteer or not:** **  
** **Additional information:**


	4. Chapter 4

**Another update! Woo! There are still tributes needed in districts: 3,5 (male only), 8, 9, 10, 12 (male only). Thank you to anyone who has left a review, and please leave more.**

 **Chapter 4**

" _Ca-Carter?" I stammer, I pit a hand on his shoulder and shake him. He doesn't move. I move off him me. There's a knife sticking out of his heart. He killed himself so I would live. No! He was always supposed to survive this. He sacrificed himself. I can't help but hate myself for it. Tears fall in a torrent down my face as I hear an announcement._

" _Ladies and gentlemen, may I present the winner of the 63_ _rd_ _hunger games, Sapphire Glart." Claudius Templesmith says. The tears flow harder, and I lie there, hugging my brother's corpse until the hovercraft picks me up and someone prises him away from me._

" _No!" I scream. "Bring him back." But they can't. I know from that moment on I would always hate myself. For letting him come to the games, for letting him die. It's all my fault. All of it._

"Now the tribute parade." Hecate announces a couple of days later. "The first time since the reaping that the public will see you. You need to make a good impression, sponsors will definitely be there."

"So we want no complaints about your stylists, there here to make people like you: not for you to like them." Rose finishes, as a man and a woman walks in. The woman's skin is dyed a deep inky blue and her hair is dyed a slightly lighter shade and has golden flecks in it. The man looks just as odd. He has jet black hair that comes down to his shoulders. He also has cat whiskers coming out of his nose. I'm sure Capitol fashion is getting stranger.

"Teal will be your stylist, Sapphire. Carter, you have Kazi." They come and shake hands with us. "Do as they say." Hecate adds as our stylists led us out. Teal takes me left and Kazi takes Carter right.

"Traditionally we dress you as something based around your district trade." His voice is low and soft.

"So," I reply slowly "I'll be diamond mining."

"Basically a sparkly blue dress." I sigh, that's been the District 1 outfit since the start of the games. "But I'm adding a bit of a twist this year." My heart leaps. "Normally it's just a blue dress, but this year I'm shaping it so you literally look like a diamond."

"What?" My heart sinks, why me?

"Isn't it a wonderful idea?" He beams. I really want to slap him, but I remember what Hecate said.

"Yeah." I reply, plastering a fake smile on my face. He leads me to a room, sits me down on a bed and him and my prep team pluck, wax and styles to their hearts' content.

Five hours later and my eyebrows are perfectly shaped, my arms and legs are waxed, my nails are polished and shaped, and my hair is soft and styled. He helps me into my dress, it is a pale blue colour and shimmers slightly. It widens near the top and tightens around my legs, to look like a cut and polished diamond. Then took Carter, who's in a pale blue shimmery suit, he helped us into our carriage where we wait for it to start.

An hour later it is all over. We smiled and waved to the crowds, they cheered and chucked flowers at us, and then listened to a long boring speech made by President Snow.

"I think that was altogether a success." Rose declares, while we are eating dinner.

"We need to decide if you two are going to train separately or not." Hecate says.

"Not." Carter and I say together "We know each other's strengths and weaknesses." I add.

"Okay, Carter any particular weapons you're good with?" Rose asks..

"Spear." He replies.

"I suggest you start with that tomorrow and Sapphire you start with knife throwing to show the other careers you are strong allies." Hecate replies. Carter and I nod. "Spend all of tomorrow going around the different weapons stations and familiarize yourself with each one. Second day of training learn survival stuff: traps, camouflage, fire starting, edible plants, stuff like that, Day three you have your individual training after lunch so spend the morning working on your weaknesses."


	5. Chapter 5

**There are still tributes needed in districts: 3,5 (male only), 8, 9, 10, 12 (male only). The SYOT forms are at the end of chapters 1 &3, please send them via PM or review. I hope you enjoy the story and please tell me what you think even if it's critical. Your reviews make me so happy. My friends at school always know when I've had a review because I go in really happy and they're just there like 'Why are we even friends with this crazy fangirl?' So pleeeeeeeeeeease review.**

 **Chapter 5**

"I suggest you go to your rooms now, you'll need lots of rest for tomorrow." Rose says. I stand up, and Carter follows, a moment later and we walk out together, when we get to my room, I give him a hug.

"Love you Carter." I whisper into his mass of thick, dark curly hair. He buries his face into my shoulder.

"Love you too." Then he's gone and I go into my room, Daisy is in there, dusting it. She shoots me an apologetic look. I'm not sure why. Maybe she was supposed to be finished before I went in. She goes to leave.

"Could you wait a minute please Daisy?" She stops, nodding, "I was wondering if there was a chance I could get a punch bag fitted in here. To train if I get restless at night," She nods and comes back a few minutes later with a tall muscular man, I think he's an avox too, and they attach it to a metal hoop that is on the middle of the ceiling.

"Thank you." I've been getting nightmares ever since the reaping and this'll help if I can distract myself. "What's your name?" I ask the man, gesturing to some paper and a pen, Daisy picked it up.

'He can't write, but he's called Hector. He's my brother.' She writes in her swirly writing. 'He was made an avox at the same time as me.'

"I'm sorry." I say and he nods his thanks and they both leave. I fling my clothes on my bed and put on a nightgown. Then I let sleep take me.

I wake up screaming and sweating. I tell myself it's not real, none of this is real. But of course I'm wrong it is real. I put on a tight black vest and leggings and go to the punch bag. Soon my knuckles are bruised and bleeding, but I push past the pain and carry on.

In the morning I wake up curled up next to the punch bag. My arms and legs are stiff so I take a steaming hot shower and get dressed. I realise I have woken up late and only have ten minutes until training starts, so I gulp down a creamy mug of hot chocolate and eat two bread rolls whilst walking with Carter to the training room. We're the last to arrive.

"Now you are all here, you may begin, remember to try and visit all the stations, not just the weapons. Exposure can kill just as easy swords." Atlanta, the training instructor says. Despite her advice, most people goes towards weapons of some sort. I go to the knife throwing station where the boy from Districts 2 and 4 are.

"You wanna go first?" Four asks me, I shrug and pick up three knives. I aim at the dummy. Bam! One in the head. Bam! One in the heart. Bam! One in the stomach. All in the dead centre of the target. District 2 whistles.

"Woah." He says in amazement, as his knives hit the target's arms and legs. "Looking for allies?" He asks.

"Only strong ones." I reply.

"Watch this." He says heading to the swords station. He picks one up and within seconds all ten dummies are in pieces.

"Fair enough. My brother's with us though." I say. He nods.

"He seems decent." He replies, looking at my brother throwing spears "And my district partner's in too." I watch her as she wrestles a trainer to the ground. She'll be a good strong ally. I nod.

"Room for two more?" District 4 boy asks.

"What can you two do?" Two asks, the boy, Alex I think, calls the four girl over and they both pick a trident up. They chuck them at a target and they both hit the centre of their targets. The District 2 boy and I nod, reprovingly.

"You're in." I say.

"No more though." Jay, the 2 boy, adds, "Let's get our district partners and train together so we get to know how we all fight."

 _Rose and Hecate are on board, I guess they knew District 1 was going to have a winner. They give me a tranquilizer and my vision goes blurry. When I wake, Rose is holding my hand._

" _I hate myself." I whisper "He should be here."_

" _He chose. It was his decision." Rose comforts._

" _I should've stopped him." I scream, and start crying. Rose rocks me back and forwards and comforts me until we get back to the capitol._


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you so much for your lovely reviews. Been meaning to do a shout out for a long time but a special thank you to Singlewave and Abby. There are still places in the SYOT in Districts:** **: 3, 8 (male only) & 10\. Hope you enjoy this chapter, next chapter will probably be day two of training and individual training & scores. Please leave a review**

 **Chapter 6**

By lunch, the six of us are laughing and chatting. I've found out that the District 2 girl is called Autumn and she is very skilled with a bow and arrows. She is also very good at climbing. Coral, the District 4 girl, other than trident throwing is excellent at knot tying. Alex is pretty good all round, but hasn't got anything in particular he's amazing at.

"Bet you couldn't throw a knife so it wedged into that piece of bread, Sapphire." Jay grinned nodding to an empty table with a basket of bread that comes from each district.

"Which one?" I reply.

"District four." I look at the bread roll with seaweed flecks in it. Almost all of it is obscured by the District 8 roll. I aim, and throw. I put so much power into t that it pierces the bread, carries it with the knife and holds it against the wall behind it.

"Impressive." Coral nods as a guard comes over.

"No knife throwing at lunch." He scowls, before walking off.

"What are you gonna do, kill me?" I mutter as the others, minus Carter, crack up.

"Don't," He whispers "Just don't."

After lunch we head off to the axe throwing station where the District 7 boy, Ash, is practising.

"He's good." Autumn whispers. "Should we ask him to join us?"

"No, there's already a quarter of us in this alliance." I mutter back.

"Wanna talk any louder about me?" Ash turns to face us, eyes blazing. We laugh loudly "You're dead in that arena; I'm going to watch the life drain from your eyes. All of you." He walked off.

"Ohhh, six against one, I'm so dead. We're going to hunt you down first and kill you slowly." Alex called after him. I picked up an axe and chucked it at a target, but miss by miles. The others hoot with laughter.

"Guess this weapon isn't for me." I grin, picking another up, this time I miss the target by inches. Carter picks one up and hits the edge of the target with it.

"Slightly better than you." He grins. Coral and Jay both pick up and axe each and throw them at different targetd. Coral's hits quite close to the centre, but Jay's falls short.

"Definatly need more practise on this." He grumbles, as Alex congratulates Coral.

All twenty four of us are standing in the lift, sweaty and exhausted. Rhe lift pulls to a stop.

"See ya!" I say to the other careers as Carter and I get out. Our penthouse is on the first floor because we're District 1.

"How'd it go?" Rose asks the second we come in, I flop down on the soft sofa, and it sinks down beneath me. Carter does the same.

"Good,we've allied with the other careers." I answer.

"Well done, did you go around all the weapons?" Hecate asks, we both nod "Sapphire, strengths and weaknesses."

"Excellent at knife throwing, pretty good with a sword. I'm average at archery and spears." I reel off "I'm terrible at axe throwing though."

"Okay, you'll need to work on that, Carter, what about you?" Hecate replies.

"I'm good with spears and archery. Average at everything else."

"Okay, you two must be exhausted, let's have some dinner." Rose says "Or would you two prefer to change first?" She adds, as an afterthought.

"I'm fine to eat now." Carter says, just as my stomach starts to rumble.

"I think that's Sapphire's answer." Hecate laughs. We tuck into a meal of roast chicken.

"Tomorrow try to concentrate on survival skills. Edible plants, knot tying, fire lighting, water sources. Then try and do some stuff like weights and climbing." Rose advises.

 _The last few days have been a blur, and pure torture. "How did you feel when the final cannon went?" Caeser Flickerman asks. I'm being forced to do a dumb interview with him. Rose and Hecate says I have to answer the questions honestly._

" _I-I felt like the arena had crushed on top of me. Like my sould died with …" I trail off. "With h-" A tear runs down my cheek, like a raindrop._

" _I am so sorry for your loss." He says, patting my knee, just below where my blood red dress ended. It's strapless and has tiny roses sewn into the hem of it._

" _It's okay." I reply, but it's not and it never will be. "I just never expected to win once his name was called. I knew District 1 would have a winner; it just wouldn't be me."_

 **SYOT Form:**

 **District:** **  
** **Gender:** **  
** **Age:** **  
** **Full name:** **  
** **Background (family, what their life is like etc.):** **  
** **Volunteer or not:** **  
** **Additional information:**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hope you enjoy this chapter it's longer than most of mine. They probably will start getting longer now. Except next chapter, that may be quite short because of the way I'm writing it in different sections. There are still places in the SYOT, in districts: : 3, 8 (male only) & 10\. Please leave your entries in the reviews or PM me. I'll put the form at the end of this chapter.**

 **Chapter 7**

The nightmares come again that night, my knuckles don't start bleeding as quickly when I start on the punch bag this time. I go back to bed after half an hour of kicking and punching.

"I heard you up last night." Rose comments whilst tipping herself coffee, the proper stuff not the rubbish we have in one. I don't like it that much, I find that it's too bitter. "You know most people tend to sleep at night." She jokes, I laugh.

"I-I get nightmares." I reply, "It helps."

"Well just try to get as much sleep as possible before you go into the arena." She advises. I nod, munching a pastry. "Remember to watch the tributes as much as possible today, particularly your allies. You need to know their strengths and weaknesses." I nod.

"Some of the tributes will deliberately not practise their strengths until individual training, though: to keep it a secret." I argue.

"It will give you some idea of the other tributes strengths though," Rose replies.

"Edible plants!" Autumn snorts when training for day 2 starts "We'll have plenty of food at the cornucopia."

"Just in case." I say "It could save our lives."

"Well you two have fun there, while we practise our fighting skills."

"We will." Carter gives her his best 'I'm just a sweet innocent boy sarcastic' smile, as we walk over to the edible plants station.

"Hey ya!" The guy there grins. Great! We have just walked to the station of some overenthusiastic guy that doesn't get many people turning up to his station. "Now I'll just do a quick test to see how much you guys know." He smiles at us, it turns out we know virtually nothing. "Lots of work to do then." He smiles, rubbing his hands together.

We finish an hour before lunch so we go to the fire starting station, by this point we know the basics of edible plants and know if we don't recognise a plant we don't eat it.

By lunch we can both start a fire with two dry bits of wood.

"Could you tell me if this is poisonous?" Autumn mocks, holding up a sprig of mint off the top of the lasagne.

"Poisonous," I reply, snatching it off her and chucking it on the floor "Mint's gross." The others laugh at Autumn "Anyway, what are you guys doing after lunch?" I change the subject.

"Hand to hand combat, weights, that kind of stuff." Jay answers.

"We'll probably join you for some of it, our instructors told us to do some climbing and weights."

"Who listens to their instructors?" Laughs Autumn. I'm starting to like her less and less by the minute.

"Well they have actually won the games, so they might just have a couple of useful tips." Carter's tongue was dripping with sarcasm.

"I was just saying." Autumn mutters as we all laugh at her.

It's just over twenty four hours later, we are waiting for our individual training. We get called one by one starting from Carter to the District 12 female.

"Cater Glart." He stands up nervously.

"Good luck." I whisper, patting his arm as he passed me. I wonder how he'll do. We won't get our scores until tonight when they'll be broadcasted on live TV. The scoring is from 1-12. Anything below five is shockingly bad. Between 5 and 8 is mediocre and nine upwards is excellent. There's never been a career that hasn't scored a nine or above. No one's ever scored a twelve before.

"Sapphire Glart." I had been in a daydream and hadn't noticed Carter's fifteen minutes were up. Alex nods to me as if to say 'Good luck'. He's started being quite nice to me since yesterday lunch. Carter told me he asked him what type of guys I was into. Then Carter started teasing me. Alex is dumb. When only one person can come out of the arena alive, why would you fall in love with another tribute. I walk through. The game makers are sitting on a high platform, they watch me intently.

"You have fifteen minutes to present your chosen skill." I head game maker, Berri Jaywoods, calls. I quickly grab a rope and a dummy, I attach it to my back and climb up the climbing wall. I hang it from the ceiling at come down. One skill down, several more to go. I grab some throwing knives (that I attach to my belt), a spear (attached to my back), a sword (on my belt again) and finally a bow with a quiver full of arrows. I have already used a third of my time. I go back up the climbing wall, this time only to the second of three platforms on it. I shoot the dummy in the back with my bow. I chuck a spear into its heart target and brain it with knives. I climb to the top, the next bit may make a lot of noise. I pull the sword out and swing it across the neck of the dummy. The body hits the floor with a crash and the head follows. I still have five more minutes. I could just throw knives at a target for five minutes, but then that would be boring. I go over to the archery station and tap on the computer. There's an option to have flying birds to shoot, I press it, but instead of killing them with a bow and arrows, I throw knives at them. I don't miss a single one. "Thank you Miss Glart." Berri says. I still have one knife left, as I walk to the lift I chuck it at the button, the hilt presses against the button so the doors open as I reach it. The knife clatters to the ground. A gasp comes from the game makers, I grin to myself. I've at least secured myself a nine.

"What did you do?" Carter asks as I walk into the room.

"Hung, shot, speared and knifed a dummy before beheading it. Then I chucked knives at a moving target. When I left a chuck a knife at the lift button to open it because I was too lazy to press it." I real off. I hear a chorus of laughter at the last comment.

"Should get you about a ten, maybe eleven if they were really impressed." Hecate chortles. "That's hilarious with the lift though."

"What did you do?" I ask Carter.

"Spears and archery." He mutters "Nothing amazing, but the targets were quite far away so I might scrape a nine."

"You're great at spears and archery." I encourage "Of course you'll get a nine."

"You've both done brilliantly, don't worry about it." Rose says, and later that evening we find out she was right.

"From District 1, Carter Glart with a score of nine." Caesar reads out. The four of us are anxiously sitting on the sofa, facing the TV. We all squeal happily and I put my arms around my younger brother. I'm so proud of him, he's the youngest ever tribute to get a nine. "And also from District 1, Sapphire Glart, with a score of eleven." My ears start bleeding from Rose's squeals. Okay, not literally, but it feels like it.

"Well done." She smiles.

"Sponsors will definitely have their eyes on you now." Hecate added. The other careers have all scored nines or tens. Most of the other tributes have mediocre scores. Ash has a nine, we'll have to watch out for him. A couple of people from outlying districts have very low scores, they'll be easy to pick off at the bloodbath.

 **SYOT Form:**

 **District:** **  
** **Gender:** **  
** **Age:** **  
** **Full name:** **  
** **Background (family, what their life is like etc.):** **  
** **Volunteer or not:** **  
** **Additional information:**


	8. Chapter 8

**I'm sooooo sorry this update has been so long coming out. It is quite long though. I lied last time, I forgot how much I needed to add before the games. The next chapter will be interviews and just before the games. I'll start on it now so it should be out today or tomorrow. There are still places in SYOT in districts: 3,8 (male only) & 10\. The form is at the bottom of the last chapter. Please review, they make me so happy, and it'll probably guarantee a faster update. **

**Chapter 8**

"Should I ask the other careers to come here so we can discuss tactics and sponsors?" Rose asks us. Carter and I nod, and Rose goes to the lift.

A few minutes later she came back with Autumn, Coral, Alex, Jay and their mentors.

"Congratulations." Alex smiles "That was an amazing score Sapphire."

"Thanks." I don't smile back; it will just encourage him.

"Come and sit down," Hecate invites as we crowd around the big table. When we are all settled he adds "So what's your tactics going to be?"

"Head straight for the cornucopia." Coral says, I shake my head. It's what the careers normally do, but I've always thought there's a better tactic.

"Only the fastest three of us. They should head straight for the best weapons, the rest grab some of the packs and hide them before joining us." I argue, "If we can't stop the others from grabbing packs, we may still have a reasonable amount of gear. Remember that year when all the alliance had was weapons and none of them could hunt so they all died of starvation, whilst the other tributes had tonnes of food."

"We can hunt though." Autumn points out.

"There may not be anything to hunt." Carter backs me up.

"Fair point." Alex says, "I'll run for a pack."

"I'll go for weapons." Jay offers.

"Me too." Autumn says.

"I'll get packs, I'm a long distance runner, not a sprinter." Carter adds, my heart lightens. He won't be in the bloodbath right at the start.

"I can go for weapons." I volunteer.

"Guess that leaves me with packs too then." Coral laughs "What else?"

"When we fight, keep in a tight circle around the other weapons to stop the other tributes from getting them." Carter suggests "Then they'll be forced to just pick a weapon from further away from the cornucopia that they may not be as skilled with."

"Okay, but you'll have to let us in and have our backs when we get back." Coral agrees.

"Now, what about sponsors?" Alex's mentor asks.

"We'll work together, see what you need as a collective group, unless it's really obvious like if one of you is injured and were sending medicine, it will be for all of you, not any one of you."

"Is that all we need to discuss?" Jay asks.

"I think so." His mentor replies.

"Let's eat then." Hecate suggests. Daisy and Hector come and set the table and bring dozens of dishes.

The next day we spend being prepped for our interviews. Most other districts have the escorts staying with them the whole time, but not the careers, so Stella Willond makes her first appearance since the reaping today. Carter and I decide to make our time more efficient for splitting up during prep for the interviews. I start with Hecate and Rose.

"So, how should we present you?" Hecate asks. Presentation is important, it can be the difference between no sponsors and loads of sponsors. The difference between life and death. I shrug, I haven't really thought about it, I haven't had time. I was concentrating on training too much.

"How about strong and powerful?" Rose suggests.

"That could work." I nod.

"Okay, I'll ask you some questions that could come up and you need to answer them." Hecate replies "Now, that was an impressive score you got in training, could you give us any hints about what you did?"

"Well, I can't tell you what I did, but let's just say the game makers probably had a hard time getting some rope off the ceiling." I laugh.

"Sounds like you did something stunning." Hecate replies.

"Well the game makers clearly thought so."

"Now, I'm sure the audience would love to hear about you and your brother."

"I-" I stumble "Carter and I are really close, but we both know only one person can come out of the arena alive and I'm pretty determined it's gonna be me."

"You have a knack for this," Rose compliments "I'm sure you'll be amazing in the interview."

After lunch Carter and I swap around so I have Stella and he has Hecate and Rose. I'm learning how to physically present myself, with my walking and the way I sit and stuff. First she makes me walk around the room with books on my head. Then she gives me huge heels to do it in. I'm sure it would be easier to actually win the games than do this. I keep almost twisting me ankles. After this she teaches me how to sit down properly (I know there's any official way. Who knew?), and then when and how to smile and laugh.

 _President Snow stares hard into my eyes as he places the victory crown on my head. I never thought I'd feel so angry about winning. Then I realise something: I haven't won, I've survived. There are no winners, only survivors, because the capitol forces us to lose so much in order to win, that it isn't really worth it._

" _I present the winner of the 63_ _rd_ _annual hunger games, Sapphire Glart." Snow announces to the cheering audience. He looks at me through his snake like eyes, and smiles. I force myself to blink quickly, so he doesn't see me at my weakest; crying, mourning for my brother._

The next day we get to ourselves until we need to get ready for the interview. Carter and I spend the morning working on our axe throwing. After lunch we rest. In less than twenty four hours we will be in the arena.

I am woken abruptly by Teal so he can get me ready for the interview. He leads me to the room where my prep team – Zara, Tarin and Bud – are going to dress me.

"First we're going to dye your hair, don't worry it's one of those dyes that come out after one wash." Tarin explains, slathering the gloopy dye onto my hair.

"What colour?" I ask.

"Black, with a midnight blue sheen to it." Zara answers, whilst bustling around me, trying to shape my stubby nails into perfectly rounded ones.

After two hours of them rushing around and spraying foul smelling stuff at me (to 'give me a radiant shine'), plucking, waxing, brushing and shaping, I am finally ready to put my dress on.

My dress is quite a simple design. It is made of a black silky material and is cool to the touch. At my chest, it bunches up to make a star out of the wrinkled material. It flows down to just above my knees and is quite tight. My shoes are black heels that don't cover my toes. Where my toes reach my feet there's a sort of tangled black vines stopping my feet from slipping out of the shoes. It intertwines up my ankle too, but has the perfect amount of room to fit my feet in them.

My hair is tumbling past my shoulders in delicate waves. My eyeliner is in long elegant flicks and my lips are coloured bright red. My nails are rounded and are painted inky blue. I am stunning.

"Perfect," Teal smiles "Knock 'em dead girl," Before hastily adding "But not literally." I laugh, and turn around to be escorted to the stage as Carter walks in, fiddling with his tie. His stylist smacks his hand away, and he rolls his eyes.

"But it's so uncomfort-" He broke off seeing me "Woah, you look nice." He compliments, stunned by my appearance.

"Always the tone of surprise." I smile, looking at his black suit. "You look pretty good yourself."

"Are you both ready to go?" Kazi asks us, we both nod.


	9. Chapter 9

**Okay, it wasn't that short. Double update today though. Woo! The next chapter will probably be the first half of the games. There are places in districts: 3, 8 (male only) & 10\. Please PM me. Please drop a review, I don't care if it's critical or not. **

**Chapter 9**

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is the moment we've all been waiting for; the interviews with the tributes." Caesar Flickerman begins a little while later. We are all sitting in a semi-circle off to one side on the stage, in the centre, Caesar is standing by two chairs – one for him, and one for a tribute. The audience starts to go wild. "Now, put your hands together for the female tribute from District 1, the stunning Miss Sapphire Glart." Oh no. I'm starting to feel sick. I'm not ready for this. Years of training at the academy couldn't have prepared me for this. But I have to be ready. I stand up, wobbling slightly, and walk over to Caesar. I wave to the audience as I go, who knows, maybe a wave will lead to a sponser which will lead to saving Carter's life.

"Hi Caesar." I smile, as he helps me to my seat.

"Can I just say, you look spectacular tonight?" He asks, as he turns to the audience who whoop their approval.

"Well yes, I suppose I can't really stop you." I smile. He and the audience burst out laughing.

"Now, on a more serious note, are you concerned for tomorrow?" He asks, as the laughter dies down.

"Of course I'm a little nervous, I mean there's no way of knowing what kind of landscape you'll end up in. I'm not concerned about being killed by the other tributes though."

"And what if you had to kill your brother, would you do it?" Caesar asks, as the audience go silent.

"In a second," I lie "Nothing, and no one is stopping me from getting out of the arena alive." Carter and I both agreed that we'd lie and say we'd kill each other if it meant winning. It would get more sponsors on our side.

"There's nothing like a good bit of sibling rivalry." Caesar comments, and changes the subject and we talk about my training score until the buzzer goes. "Well that's all we get from Sapphire I'm afraid, but all the luck."

"Thank you." I smile at the audience. I stand up again and walk back to my seat.

"Now, you've met his sister, I'm sure you'd like to meet him, the District 1 tribute, Carter Glart." Caesar announced over the cheering audience. Carter stood up and went over to Caesar, smiling as he went.

"Hey." He flopped down on his seat with an elegant arrogance.

"Carter, I'm sure we'd all like to know what your response to Sapphire's earlier comments are." Caesar launches into the interview straight away.

"I have three words I want to say to her." He grins, arching his eyebrows "Bring. It. On." The audience gasped and started cheering. They're sick. They think it's entertainment to force a borther and a sister to fight to the death.

"This should be fun to watch, now if you do win – and we have full confidence that you can – is there a girl back home?" He asks, Carter smiles, thinking fondly of Zoey.

"I have a girlfriend already actually." He answers "Well, sort of."

"Tell us more." Caesar replied.

"I've dated her for six months, but she wanted to split up after the reaping. Just in case I didn't make it home alive."

"And her name?" Caesar persists. Carter's eyes start watering.

"She's the girl Sapphire volunteered for – Zoey Slater." Carter broke down and started crying "Sorry, I just love her so much. I just want to see her so much." Caesar pats his knee.

"It's okay, perfectly understandable. Now, what's your message to her, if she's watching this?"

"Be strong, it doesn't matter what you see on the screen, I'm always with you." The buzzer goes off.

"I'm afraid that's all we have time for." Caesar announces "Our hearts go with you."

I don't sleep well that night. I keep wondering about what the arena will be like. What weapons I will have. Will I kill? This time tomorrow will I even be alive? Will Carter? My mind whirrs around an infinite number of possible outcomes. I eventually go into the living room and gaze out the window. People are partying, they can't wait. They can't wait for the blood to flow.

"Sapphire, there you are." Stella says, coming in the next morning "Time to get up poppet." I am still on the sofa, I must have fallen asleep here last night. I have breakfast, wondering when my next meal will be. I eat carefully. Nothing too rich. The last thing I want to do is throw up and have no energy for the bloodbath. I mainly eat carbohydrates. I also drink lots of water. I don't know what the water situation will be like.

"Does everything fit?" Teal asked two hours later, ten minutes before the games begin. I nod. I go over to the machine and press some buttons and it drops some high energy bars. Energy that will help a good deal in the bloodbath. I eat three in quick succession.

"Sixty seconds." I zip my coat up and walk to the glass, circular lift.

"I'm sorry about you and your brother." Teal says, we haven't really talked much. We haven't needed to, but in that moment I feel like we have bonded more than hours of preparing for the interview.

"Thank you, you're not as sorry as me." I smile weakly. He smiles back.

"Good luck."

"Thank you." I hope he has a good life. I don't think he agrees with the games, but he needs money to survive.

"10 seconds."

"See you soon." I reply, but we both know I'm lying, because we both know I'd never let Carter die. The glass comes around, so I can't escape. Teal looks at me one last time, as I shoot upwards towards daylight.


	10. Chapter 10

**Another update. Longest chapter so far. Wooo! There are still places in districts: 3, 8 (male only) and 10. Please R & R.**

 **Chapter 10**

Sixty seconds, that's how long I have to take in my surroundings and make a decision that could be the difference between life and death. I start scanning for a weapon and look at the terrain.

There's a huge mountain to my right, it looks barren. To the left is a muddy river, and beyond it a dark forest.

I turn my gaze to the cornucopia. There are weapons and packs scattered around the outside. The weapons I'm best with will be inside though. I spot a short spear I can use until I get inside the cornucopia, I get ready to run for it. Five. Four. Three. Two. One. I'm at it in a few seconds, the District 9 boy also went for it, so I stab him swiftly and he falls to the ground, unmoving.

"No!" The District 9 girl lunges towards me. I chuck the spear at her and she also falls to the ground. I hear her whisper something as she falls "I'll be with you now dad. I sacrificed myself like you." I decide she's a bit weird. And also dead. Weapon-less, I run towards where Autumn and Jay are already defending the cornucopia entrance. They let me in and I grab some knives and put them in my belt and then I grab a long, sharp, curved sword. It glistens in the sunlight. Autumn and Jay are fighting the District 11 girl, I look behind them and see the District 3 boy trying to swim across the river. I chuck a knife into his back. He goes underwater as the brown water turns a murky red. A few bubbles come up. He's dead. Carter suddenly and I guard his back as he grabs a bow and quiver full of arrows and a spear. When we come out the District 11 girl is lying dead on the floor, she has blood dripping off her head. Out of the corner of my eye I see a movement and I turn and am about to throw a knife at them, when I notice it is Coral.

Her curly red hair is bouncing around her chin and she has a fleck of blood on her cheek. She is running as quickly as she can, but she is slowed down because she is clutching her arm. Blood is trickling out between her fingers. She reaches me.

"Ash." She mutters darkly as she moves her hand to show a slit in her coat and shirt that dark red blood is dripping out of.

"There's bandages and stuff in there." I nod towards further into the cornucopia. She nods and goes in.

"Where's Alex?" Carter asks.

"He'd better not be dead." Autumn replies. I glance around and see him running around a boulder to us. Suddenly, the District 12 boy rushes into him and shoves him over. I don't hesitate, I sprint to them, the 12 boy is holding Alex's neck, his face is purple. I slash my sword at the 12 boy. It's a wide cut, but it is quite shallow. He howls in pain and leaps away and runs away, blood dripping off him as he goes. Without medical stuff it's going to get infected and he'll die soon. I don't pursue him. I need to stay close to the cornucopia.

Two hours later the bloodbath is over. We have the cornucopia. Thirteen cannons boom. Thirteen deaths. I know some of them who died: 3 boy, both from 9, the girl from 11 and I killed both from 5 close to the end. Just over two hours in and over half of us are dead already.

"Thanks for saving me earlier." Alex says to me. I forgot he had a thing for me. He'll be worse than ever now. Maybe I should have let him die.

"It's okay." I reply, before turning my back on him.

"We should get some rest." Alex adds "I'll keep first watch for a couple of hours, then I'll wake Coral for an hour." We all nod at this suggestion, we're exhausted after the bloodbath. It's too hot to sleep in the sleeping bags we've got, so we lay on top of them. It's comfier than the hard ground anyway.

Carter wakes me up three hours later, and we start to divide up our gear. Between the six of us we have: 3 first aid kits, eight full 2 litre bottles of water, 12 sleeping bags, loads of thin wire and all the weapons we could hope for. I end up with about fifteen throwing knives that I attach carefully to the inside of my coat so I won't accidently stab myself. Tucked behind my pack are two curved swords , they are as sharp as a talon. Their handles stick up by my shoulders so I can grab them quickly. I also have a small knife attached to my ankle just in case. In the pack on my back is: a short spear, five or six cans of food, a large pack of nuts, some wire, a bottle of water and a sleeping bag. We leave the gear we don't want in the cornucopia, but set up some intricate traps so no one can get them without being killed. Then we hunt.

"I cut up someone pretty bad, but they ran off before I could finish them. He won't have gone far. Let's get him first." I suggest. The others nod, and we follow the drips of blood the 12 boy left behind. We soon find him in a cave not far off. He hasn't got long left to live. The wound is already infected and he is a pale blue colour. His chest is rising up and down very slowly. He sees us come in.

"Please, I can help you." He begs "Just help me, please don't kill me."

"You're right you can help us, by making sure we have a better chance of winning." Autumn says.

"No, please. I had to volunteer for my dad. He's ill and my mum's dead. I have to win to pay for his medicine. He'll die otherwise." He begs.

"So, I'm in the games with my brother." I snarl. Alex chucks his trident, it hits him straight in the chest. Boom! The cannon goes off. Fourteen dead.

"Come on." Jay says, leading the way out again. We decide most people will stay in the forest. It probably has a water source and food. The only way to get there though, is to swim.

"You four go first, Carter and I will watch your backs, then you watch ours when we come along." I say. They jump in and soon all of us are dripping wet on the other side. At nightfall we haven't found anyone.

"Let's rest." Carter suggests as we walk into a clearing. Autumn nods, and I sit down, leaning against a tree stump. We gaze up to the sky, waiting. The capitol seal soon comes up. Then 'The Fallen'. The people that have died today are: 3 boy, both from 5, 7 girl, both from 8,9,10, 11 and 12. An idea pops into my head.

"I'll take first watch." I offer. Everyone but Alex settles down, he comes and sits next to me. No! He needs to be asleep too for this to work. "I'll be fine." I say.

"I'm not tired." He really is persistent. Maybe in other circumstances we could have dated. But we're in the games. There's only one winner, and it's going to be Carter. Everyone else is asleep now, but he's still here. It may be easier to pretend to like him though. I rest my head on his shoulder. "You're really hot you know." He says. That didn't take long.

"You're pretty good looking yourself." I reply, feeling around for the knife on my ankle. He smiles, not noticing.

"Thanks." He kisses my head. I grab hold of the knife on my ankle, and pretend to go to hug him. I stab him exactly where I wanted to. There's a point on the spine where if you stab it, you die almost instantly: you're paralysed for a couple of seconds, and then dead. That's where I got him. I push his body away and in turn stab the others so they also die almost instantly. Well, all except Carter. Now there's eighteen dead. Only four are trying to kill him. He'll be safer now. I don't think we should stick together now. I think it should be down to chance. I divide up the rest of the gear between him and me. I've done my best. I'll wait until he wakes up, then leave. I climb up a nearby tree and wait. After a couple of hours he stirs.

"Sapphy, do you want me to take over now?" He whispers, not looking around. Silence answers him. He stands up and sees the four dead bodies. He works it out almost instantly. He's smart like that. "Well done Sapphy." He mutters, I don't know if he realises I'm there or if he's talking to himself. He checks his pack and wanders off. I jump down the tree and walk in the opposite direction. Whatever happens now is down to fate.

This may turn out to be the longest games in existence. There's six left. They'll start interviewing our families now. That's what happens when there's six left. There's only four districts left in the games: 1,3,6 and 7. Eighteen dead and it hasn't even been twenty four hours yet. Things usually slow down a bit after day one. I find a suitable tree and strap myself to a sturdy branch on it and get some rest.

I am woken by the cannon. I hope it's not Carter. Or maybe I do. Then he won't have to watch me die. If it wasn't him the odds that we'll have to fight are less than 1:4.

" _Mum, dad, I'm so sorry." Tears gush down my face as I rush off the train to meet them. They blank me._

" _He was just a boy." Mum finally sobs, Dad turns to me angrily._

" _You were supposed to protect him, bring him home alive."_

" _I tries, he-he just." I trail off, they're right. It's all my fault, Zoey comes up to me and we have a wet embrace._

" _It's no use, I've tried. They're convinced it's your fault. They won't forgive you." She whispers._

" _They're right. It is my fault." I reply "I'm sorry." Zoey wipes my tears away._

" _No it's not. You weren't to know that his name would be picked. It's the capitol's fault." She nutters "Come on, I'll help you settle into your new house at the victor's village." I look more closely at her and see a pale yellow bruise on one eye. Her parents abuse her but she can't do anything about it. Or if they could, they didn't care. Until now._

" _Come and live with me." I offer._

" _She's not living under our roof." Mum objects, Mum's never liked Zoey. I don't know why._

" _It's my house, if you don't want Zoey there, then you're not living with me. You can't accept he made his own choice." I yell, I'm wrong though. It's all my fault that Carter's dead. Zoey leads me away before I break down again._


	11. AN

This isn't actually a chapter sorry. I just wanted to address some stuff that came up in the reviews when I updated it last time. Firstly thank you for your lovely comment Redwut it made my day . Secondly, (this didn't actually come up but I need to tell you guys) the SYOT is now closed please don't send me anymore entries. Thirdly, some of you guys were angry that my story focuses on one character, so your tributes aren't having any big deaths or anything. This is because I prefer to write from one POV, but later on you will get at least one chapter about each tribute. I did mean to say this at the start of the story but I forgot, so if your character doesn't really get mentioned and they die, don't worry they will get mentioned later on sorry for any anger I have caused. I will try to update later today.


	12. Chapter 12

**Please R &R. The next chapter is just the rest of the flash-forwards. After that there will be a couple more chapters then the victory tour. Hope you enjoy**

 **Chapter 10**

I jump down from the tree and start wandering around to find and kill people. I open my bag of nuts and nibble them quietly as I walk. Soon I see s soft spiral of smoke. Idiot. I head towards it, sipping my water slowly as I go. As I get nearer I start to tread more softly, so they won't hear me approaching. I soon see where the smoke is coming from: a small fire in a clearing. The District 6 girl is sitting on log there, cooking some kind of bird over the it. Her arm is in a sling. She hears a twig snap, looks around and sees me. She grabs her pack and tries to run. Her cannon booms before she's even stood up. I check her pack out, I take the half full water bottle but I don't need any of the other stuff so I dump it in the fire before stamping it out. Then I start hunting again.

I've been walking for hours now. I'm wandering next to a small stream that is chuckling by my feet. The water is crystal clear and bubbling a little. I bend down and fill my almost empty bottles. That's when I realise Ash, the seven boy, is following me. At least I think it's him. I only notice because a large chip of wood flies off a tree and lands next to me. It isn't rough like it's just been picked off, it's been sliced off. By an axe. Like someone had to stop abruptly to stop themselves being seen. Like they were holding an axe by their side when they stopped and it skimmed the tree and sliced a little off. Ash is the only tribute skilled with an axe. I carry on, pretending I haven't noticed, when I reach the river by the cornucopia I stop.

"I know you've been following me for ages." I say, turning around.

"How long?" Ash steps out from behind the trees, I was right. He holds the axe up like he's about to throw it. I take a knife from my coat, slowly so he doesn't notice.

"Since I stopped to refill my bottle." He looks shocked. I guess he didn't expect me to be so smart.

"It doesn't matter, I'm still going to kill you anyway." He's about to throw the axe, when I fling my knife at his hand. It lodges in it, so he drops the axe on his foot and he howls in pain. I stab him with my sword while he's hopping around clutching his foot. Boom! Three off us left now. It could be any combination of me with Carter, the District 3 girl and the District 6 boy. I decide to give myself a rest for now. I swim across the river and run to the cave we killed the boy in yesterday.

When I reach it, I set up wire traps, to stop someone trying to kill me. I drift in and out of sleep until dusk. Then I head back to the forest and climb up a tree to watch The Fallen. I need to know if Carter's dead. The Capitol seal comes up followed by pictures of: Alex, Autumn, the District 3 girl, Jay, Coral, District 6 girl and finally Ash. Joy seeps through me. Carter's alive. I only have to kill one more person and he can go home. He'll be the games youngest winner, even younger than Finnick Odair, last year's winner. He was 14 when he went in. He killed virtually everyone.

I count how many I've killed in the past 36 hours. Five in the initial bloodbath. The four other careers. Then the District 6 girl and Ash. I don't even know the names of some I've killed. I stay in the tree all night.

When I awake the sun is rising. It's the first sunrise I've ever seen. The sky is set on fire by the faded orange of the sun and pale pink of the clouds; it's beautiful. I finally climb down and start hunting in the woods. He's smarter than he looks, either he's kept to the mountain or he's an incredibly good hider. By midday I've covered pretty much all the ground in the forest, so I eat a tin of cold lamb stew and head to the mountain.

I spend the afternoon searching through caves and crevices and can't find him. That's when I see he mutt. It's half bear, half wolf. And it's heading straight for me. There's no time for me to take one of my weapons; so I run. Suddenly I feel warm blood splatter my neck. I turn and see it laying on the floor dead. There's a knife lodged into its back. I turn just in time to see a few stones fall off a ledge and hear a scrabbling as the person who threw the knife ran off. That's how I know he's the District 6 boy, Carter wouldn't run off. He just saved my life though. I will let him live, for now. I will let him get his knife in repayment, then we'll be equal. I'm not even sure how he got such a good aim. He looked like one of the many morphling addicts that District 6 has.

I go back to the cave I slept in yesterday and open a tin of fruit, while planning my attack on him. That's when I hear Claudius Templesmith's announcement.

"As you should know there are only three of you left, but you all want something, desperately." He begins. Carter. And my hands are killing me, usually I use a pair of specially designed knife throwing gloves. My hands are starting to blister without them. "At sunset today, go inside the cornucopia and you will find whatever you want. Happy hunger games, and may the odds be ever in your favour." The District 6 boy, Ventador I'm pretty sure his name is, will almost certainly be there.

I get up and head to the cornucopia and scout around for the best place to hide. I find a dip on this roof of the cornucopia and I go back to the cave until an hour or so before sunset. Then I go back and hide in the dip. I see a movement in the trees. Carter. Good, he can go home tonight. I jump off the roof and go inside. There's a pack full to the brim full of food and see through packs of clear liquid. Morphling. Seriously? He must be addicted. Next to it is a deadly looking spear, it must be for Carter. Then next to that is a pair of knife throwing gloves. I pull them on and grab the spear just as Carter comes in, I hand it to him.

"Sapph, you didn't have to betray them." He says.

"There's only one winner." I reply coldly, and walk out, searching for Ventador. He's sprinting towards the cornucopia, where we are. It's dim so he can't see us. I draw my sword. He's closer now and has seen us.

"P-please spare me, I saved your life." He begged.

"I'm not winning, it was a waste of time." I reply "I'll make it quick though." I slash across his chest, and he falls to the floor, panting in pain. I make a stab, in his heart and the cannon goes.

"Do it then." Carter says "There's only one winner, it should be you." I shake my head

"No, Carter we need to talk."

"Just kill me already, you deserve to win." I sprint to the river and dive in. He jumps in too, and drags me out the other side. I run into the forest, and find myself by the stream. I have to make sure he forgives himself before I die. I know I'm going to die. But I was never going to win this. I always knew that from when Carter's name was called. My goal was always to make sure he won. I'm exhausted by now, from all the running, and I fall to the floor.

The finishing line is so near, yet so far. I use the last of my strength to throw a knife, it barely scrapes his arm. It was deliberate. I'm not going to let him lose. Then he throws a spear, it's quite an easy one to dodge. I think he meant me to, but I had no strength to roll out of the way. It lodges in my stomach, not too deep though. Blood gushes out of the wound like a waterfall, it drips into the stream, turning it a pale pink. At least I'll die looking at something beautiful. I only wanted to make my family respect me, make my district proud. He was never supposed to be reaped.

"P-p-please." I beg "P-please m-make it q-q-q," I stammer "Quick" I know I don't have long left to live, but the pain. It's so bad. "Ca-Carter, it-it hu-hurts. I-if y-you e-ever." I don't have any more strength left. I see his face, almost for the first time since the first day. Tears glisten in his eyes, he pulls the spear out, and tries to staunch the flow of blood. He gives me some bread. "J-just d-do it." I murmur "I-I forgive you. I will always a-and c-comp-completely f-forgive you. One of us has to d-die." He stops.

"You may be able to forgive me," He says "But I wouldn't." Then he leans over and kisses my forehead, and I hear the cannon. The final cannon. And I only know one thing: it's not mine.

"Ca-Carter?" I stammer, I pit a hand on his shoulder and shake him. He doesn't move. I move off him me. There's a knife sticking out of his heart. He killed himself so I would live. No! He was always supposed to survive this. He sacrificed himself. I can't help but hate myself for it. Tears fall in a torrent down my face as I hear an announcement.

"Ladies and gentlemen, may I present the winner of the 63rd hunger games, Sapphire Glart." Claudius Templesmith says. The tears flow harder, and I lie there, hugging my brother's corpse until the hovercraft picks me up and someone prises him away from me.

"No!" I scream. "Bring him back." But they can't. I know from that moment on I would always hate myself. For letting him come to the games, for letting him die. It's all my fault. All of it.


	13. Chapter 13

**Barely 500 words, and it's just flash-forwards from throughout the story so far put together in the right order, the next chapter should be out by Wednesday but I have got tonnes of revision, so sorry if it's not.**

 **Chapter 11**

Rose and Hecate are on board, I guess they knew District 1 was going to have a winner. They give me a tranquilizer and my vision goes blurry. When I wake, Rose is holding my hand.

"I hate myself." I whisper "He should be here."

"He chose. It was his decision." Rose comforts.

"I should've stopped him." I scream, and start crying. Rose rocks me back and forwards and comforts me until we get back to the capitol.

The last few days have been a blur, and pure torture. "How did you feel when the final cannon went?" Caeser Flickerman asks. I'm being forced to do a dumb interview with him. Rose and Hecate says I have to answer the questions honestly.

"I-I felt like the arena had crushed on top of me. Like my sould died with …" I trail off. "With h-" A tear runs down my cheek, like a raindrop.

"I am so sorry for your loss." He says, patting my knee, just below where my blood red dress ended. It's strapless and has tiny roses sewn into the hem of it.

"It's okay." I reply, but it's not and it never will be. "I just never expected to win once his name was called. I knew District 1 would have a winner; it just wouldn't be me."

President Snow stares hard into my eyes as he places the victory crown on my head. I never thought I'd feel so angry about winning. Then I realise something: I haven't won, I've survived. There are no winners, only survivors, because the capitol forces us to lose so much in order to win, that it isn't really worth it.

"I present the winner of the 63rd annual hunger games, Sapphire Glart." Snow announces to the cheering audience. He looks at me through his snake like eyes, and smiles. I force myself to blink quickly, so he doesn't see me at my weakest; crying, mourning for my brother.

"Mum, dad, I'm so sorry." Tears gush down my face as I rush off the train to meet them. They blank me.

"He was just a boy." Mum finally sobs, Dad turns to me angrily.

"You were supposed to protect him, bring him home alive."

"I tries, he-he just." I trail off, they're right. It's all my fault, Zoey comes up to me and we have a wet embrace.

"It's no use, I've tried. They're convinced it's your fault. They won't forgive you." She whispers.

"They're right. It is my fault." I reply "I'm sorry." Zoey wipes my tears away.

"No it's not. You weren't to know that his name would be picked. It's the capitol's fault." She nutters "Come on, I'll help you settle into your new house at the victor's village." I look more closely at her and see a pale yellow bruise on one eye. Her parents abuse her but she can't do anything about it. Or if they could, they didn't care. Until now.


	14. Chapter 14

**Sorry it's not long**

 **Chapter 12**

"Come and live with me." I offer.

"She's not living under our roof." Mum objects, Mum's never liked Zoey. I don't know why.

"It's my house, if you don't want Zoey there, then you're not living with me. You can't accept he made his own choice." I yell, I'm wrong though. It's all my fault that Carter's dead. Zoey leads me away before I break down again.

"Are you sure you don't mind me living with you?" Zoey asks, as we reach the door of my new house. I dig into my pocket and fumble with the key in the lock. I nod.

"The house will be huge for the two of us. You're like a sister to me anyway, and it's what he would have wanted." I reply, pushing the front door open.

"Thank you." She smiles sadly and steps inside after me. We drift through the house, looking at all the rooms, until we reach the loft. Carter would have loved the loft. It has a skylight that fills the small room with pale, dusty sunlight.

"I-I'd like this room, as my own quiet room. Not my bedroom, but for when I want to be alone, so if you don't mind, could you not come in here until I'm ready." I say, sinking into an armchair/

"Of course," She answers "Carter would have loved it." She smiled.

"You can have first pick of bedroom though." I grin, in an attempt to cheer us both up. I don't know who I was kidding though. We're not going to cheer up for a long time. She gives me a watery smile back. This is the longest conversation we've had since…since… the games.

A few hours later I go back up to the loft. I grab a lump of charcoal and some paper and sit at the desk. I'm so absorbed in my work, I don't notice it's time to eat until Zoey knocks on my door. We eat in front of the TV, so we don't have to listen to the deafening silence.

"Hunger games winner Sapphire Glart is struggling to adjust back to life after watching her brother die in her arms." They show a short clip of me yelling at my parents, and Zoey leading me off at the train station. "If you're watching this Sapphire, President Snow sends his deepest regards, and I think I speak for everyone at the Capitol when I say we miss him too."

"You didn't even know him!" I scream at the TV. Then I collapse on the sofa sobbing. Zoey hugs me, and we sit there sobbing in each other's arms.

"He's not coming back, is he?" She whispers. We both haven't accepted the truth yet.

"I want him too, why couldn't he have let me die?" I reply.

"Because he was Carter." Zoey sobs. The next morning we wake up, still embraced in each other's arms.


	15. Chapter 15

**Sorry it's not long and doesn't add much to the plot line. Please R & R.**

 **Chapter 13**

Once I've had breakfast, I go to the justice building and un-sign Zoey for tesserae, we don't need it, now I've won I get tonnes of money and food parcels. Then I go to the bakers and buy loads of small bread rolls, and go to the school Carter went to. I stand outside the gate and give the rolls to all the skinny, hollow-faced kids. Everyone thinks District 1 is really rich because we have a hunger games training academy, but there is a really poor section of town. They can't get jobs and spend their days begging, and hoping that by sending their kids to school they'll be able to get a job when they leave school.

When I've run out of rolls, I head to the market, I pick up some decent water paints and colouring pencils, and go back up to the loft for the rest of the day. After nine hours straight working on it, it is finally perfect. I pin it up to the three pencil drawings from yesterday and head down to the kitchen.

The air smells rich and oniony, I look over to the hob, Zoey is standing stirring a saucepan.

"I was going to make tea." I say.

"I was hungry, I usually have tea quite early."

"Oh, okay then. I'll do it tomorrow," I reply before adding "It smells good. What is it?"

"Only onion soup. I went down to the market and bought I few stuff for it earlier," She answers "I hope that's okay."

"Don't worry, the money's sharing." I sniff the air, hungrily "Is it almost done." She nods.

"Keep stirring and I'll sort the bread out." I take her place by the steaming saucepan, and stir with the wooden spoon slowly as she opens the over and takes a large golden brown baguette out the oven. She cuts it in half, then slices both halves open and spreads generous portions of butter so it melts into the fluffy white insides. She puts them on small plates and takes two large bowls out. She spoons the thick soup into them and we sit down to eat, not bothering to switch the TV on this time.

"How was school then?" I ask, taking a large spoon of the delicious soup.

"I didn't go." She admits. I sigh.

"You can have the rest of this week off, but you have to go back on Monday." I reply. She nods.

The next day Kaya visits me.

"Hey," She smiles as I open the door. "How are you?" I gesture to her to come in before repling.

"Okay, I guess. Well not really, but, you know." I reply, vaugly.

"You?"

"I'm getting by." She smiles, but I can see she's trying to hold herself together.

"Do you want a drink or anything. I have coffee, the real stuff, not the rubbish we usually get. Or this drink they always have at the Capitol, it's called hot chocolate." I say, leading her into the lounge.

"Never heard of it, so I might as well try it." She smiles.

"I'll be just a minute." I say, going through to the kitchen, but Kaya follows me.

"Don't worry I'll come with you." She flips her brown hair out of her dark green eyes. I fill the kettle up and switch it on. The water soon starts to boil, as I spoon the powder into two mugs.

"You'll probably like it, you love chocolate don't you?" I ask, tipping the boiling water into the mugs.

"Love? That's an understatement." She laughs, as I stir it and splash some milk into it and hand it to her. She takes a sip and gasps as she swallows it. "Oh. My. Gosh. This is amazing."

"I told you." I grin.


	16. Author's note

This is isn't an actual chapter sorry. I kind of left my USB somewhere last night and I was halfway through writing a chapter so you won't get an update until Saturday at the earliest sorry. But the good news is I can start writing other sections of the story and save to my laptop, so when I do get my USB back, I can finish the chapter and upload a few chapters at once.


	17. Chapter 17

**Woo! This chapter's over 2k words. Sorry I couldn't update sooner, but I wrote another chapter that I'll update now while I didn't have the memory stick. Then back this story up so it doesn't happen again. I'll probably only update twice a week now. Too much homework. Take some advice people: don't do year 10. Too many tests and homework. Skip year 11 too, I bet it'll be worse. xD Enjoy :D**

 **Chapter 14**

 **Almost six months later**

I am woken by a knocking at the front door.

"I'll get it." Zoey calls, as I groan and start to get dressed. There's a knock on my bedroom door a few minutes later.

"Come in." I call, then Teal and my prep team come in.

"Hey Sapphire." Teal says, kissing me on either cheek.

"Hi," I say, yawning "How are you?"

"Good." He takes out a white silk dressing gown "How are you? Now can you put this on?" I shrug and take the dressing gown and go into my ensuite to put it on in private. Soon Teal and my prep team are slathering weird gloopy mousses in my hair and some bright blue mixture on my arms, legs and face. This process takes several hours.

"We're almost done now, we just need to style your hair." Teal says at last. I can't wait for the victory tour to be over. It's just going to have constant reminders of Carter. I want to get past what happened in the games, after the victory tour, but something tells me the Capitol won't let me. Zoey comes up with some pastries for us. She's discovered she's amazing at cooking and when she's finished school she's going to start up a bakery.

"Okay, we've finished," Teal says, plucking one last hair from my eyebrows. "What do you think?" He asks, helping me up to the mirror. I am wearing a long pale blue dress and my feet are in pale blue ballet pumps. My long blonde hair is in waves tumbling down my back. I have lots of makeup on, but it's subtle. I have lip gloss, but not lip stick. Mascara, but not eye shadow. Foundation, but no blusher. It makes me look younger than I am. It makes me look like as of six months ago I hadn't murdered thirteen people, including my brother. Teal leads me downstairs where Rose and Hecate are waiting with Stella Willond.

"Hey Sapphy." Stella says. No one's called me that since Carter… since Carter… since I killed Carter.

"Hi." I reply briefly as Stella starts to brief me.

"Okay, you won't need to say much, but you just need to tell Caesar a little about how life is now you're back in District 1." I nod, as Rose and Hecate take me to the front door and open it as the cameras start rolling.

"So Sapphire, how are you doing now the games are over?" Caesar asks, from the mini TV behind the camera. The games aren't over. Not really. Not for me. I'm in the games every night. Playing it out over and over again, trying to work it out, how to let him win. So I don't kill him.

"Good," I lie "And how are you Caesar?"

"I am very well Sapphire, but I don't think the audience want to hear about me. I think here at the Capitol we're all dying to hear what you are doing now the games are over." _Dying._ I doubt it.

"I mostly spend my times drawing and painting. It helps with the pain, of losing him. Carter I mean." I answer, finally a question I can answer honestly.

"Now, that's all we have time for, but we'll keep up with you throughout the victory tour." Caesar says.

"Bye Caesar." I say. Then the cameras switch off, and I am bundled onto the train.

We arrive at District 12 a few days later. I never even spoke to either of their tributes. I think it'll be hard when I get to the districts of those who I killed personally,( I mean the Alex killed the 12 boy, but I didn't stop him); especially the career districts. Rose gives me a speech that I have to say in front of all the District 12 people. On the girl's, Diara I discover is her name; side is who I presume is her parents. The boy, Gold, only has a dad, he looks really ill. Maybe he wasn't lying in the games when he said he volunteered to get his dad medicine. I say the speech and they all pretend to go wild. Then we do something no other tribute has done before. Snow's doing it as a trial this year. I have to have a meal with the family of the fallen tributes.

"Hi." I smile at Gold's dad and Daira's mum. They nod back.

"Hello." Daira's dad says, gruffly.

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to win. It's just how it works." I say. I don't want it to be awkward.

"I know, sometimes I think Daira was right." Daira's mum says.

"About what?" I ask. She leans closer, pretending to offer me a roll of bread, but when she's next to my ear she whispers something.

"The Capitol is sick and manipulative." Then she smiles and says louder so the peacekeepers can hear "The reaping should be for older people." She's smart. She couldn't say anything completely bad about the Capitol, so she twisted it. But she still told me what she meant.

"Oh, I agree too." I say, but look her in the eye, so she knows I mean about the Capitol being manipulative and sick.

"She was too young to be reaped." Her mum says. "Only thirteen. And I was rude to her. The last thing I said to her before the reaping. I was rude to her. I didn't listen to the reapings because I was angry with her. So I didn't know. I didn't know to go and say goodbye." She dissolves into tears "I never saw her again. Apart from on the screen. But she died on the first day. And it looked painful."

 **Nearly six months earlier**

 **Daira's POV**

The odds were never in my favour. I hope it ends soon though. I don't want my parents to have to watch me suffer. I always thought the Capitol was weird. And manipulative. I never wanted to play their games. It all started at the reapings.

"Honey, it's time to get up." Mum said, gently shaking my shoulder, as I groan and bury further into the folds of my soft, warm blanket.

"I don't want to." I moan.

"Come on sweetheart, you need to be ready for the reaping, it's in a couple of hours. I've made you your breakfast." I finally sit up, shivering in the cold air and go downstairs, rubbing my eyes tiredly as I went.

On the table is two small rolls that have soft butter melting inside. I eat them quickly, savouring the warm sweet taste. Then I go upstairs and get into the outfit my dad washed for me last night. It is plain, compared to the Capitol's extravagant outfits. But then they are just dumb when it comes to fashion. Actually no, they're dumb when it comes to a lot of things. Most things really. I mean to stop people rebelling who would make twenty four of their kids fight in an arena until there's only one left. Every single year. For sixty two years. And I expect there'll be a lot more. I then brush my hair and leave it down. I love having my hair down. I'm not allowed at school though. If I'm going to be reaped today, I want to stay being me. I don't want to end up not looking like me. Which includes my hair being down.

"Daira, come and help me sort out the vegetables for dinner so we don't have to do it after the reaping." My mum calls from downstairs. Urgh! We always agree that on the day of the reaping I don't do any chores.

"I'm going out with my friends for a bit." I say going downstairs to the kitchen.

"After you've done the vegetables." Mum says "I know it's the reaping, but I'm stretched for time and it will only take you half an hour max." I groan.

"That's not the deal." I go to the door and open it.

"Get back here, you ungrateful little brat!" Mum screams, completely losing it. "There are kids in the seam that would give anything to have vegetables, they wouldn't care about spending a little bit of time helping their parents prepare it." I ignore her and go to the market, where my friends and I agreed to meet up.

"Hey Jess." My best friend is already waiting there for me.

"Hi, Holly and Gareth can't come, they're grounded for being late yesterday." She says. Holly and Gareth are twins and are in our class at school.

"Poor them." I sympathise.

"The good news is that my dad gave me some money to buy a small cake each at the bakery, so we can have two now."

"They cost a fortune though." I say.

"Dad got promoted, they needed another monitor in the mines, they demoted the last one because they didn't notice there was going to be an accident. You know the explosion last week?" I nod. Of course I do. We have monitors outside the coal mines that try to prevent accidents, but they still occur. The last one was quite big. There was twenty deaths and more than fifty injured.

"At least he won't be in any explosions." I say.

"Yeah, dad's given us all treats recently to celebrate." She grins "Mum's been able to buy some better quality cloths too, which means people are paying her more to make their clothes too." We start walking to the bakery, when we get there we spend five minutes drooling in front of the window at the beautifully decorated cakes. "Should we just buy the twins whatever we're having and give it to their mum so they can still have them. I'd feel mean otherwise?" I nod, finally choosing a delicately iced round shortbread biscuit. We eventually go inside, there's a small boy by the counter.

"I'll go get my mum." He says and disappears off. He comes back a few minutes later with a tall prim looking lady.

"What do you want to buy?" She asks, Jess starts talking to her and the little boy comes out from behind his mum's leg.

"Hello," I say to him "What's your name?"

"Peeta," He replies "Peeta Mellark." His voice is quiet and soft.

"That's a nice name." I smile at him.

"Thank you," He whispers "I hope you don't get picked." This is just about the highest compliment a four or five year old could pay you. I smile softly.

"Thank you. Me too." Then Jess drags me out so we have enough time to drop the biscuits off at the twins' house before the reaping. Then we head to the square and are led into our pens. We stand, holding each other's hands nervously.

As usual we are shown a video about why we have to take part in the hunger games. And as usual Haymitch Abernathy is sitting on the stage very drunk.

"Ladies first." Effie Trinket, the District 12 escort, eventually says. She goes to the clear glass bowl on the left side of the stage and rummages around in it. She pulls one out and opens her mouth to read it. I hope it's not me. It shouldn't be me. My name's only in twice. That's the minimum for a thirteen year old. After what seems like an eternity she reads out "Daira Dhillon." No! No, no, no! Not me. Jess squeezes her hand, and starts to sob. I move forwards, and a group of peacekeepers escort me forwards. Why me? My name was in twice. Twice amongst thousands. "And Daira, how old are you?" A microphone is suddenly in my face and Effie is smiling brightly down at me.

"Thirteen." I say, trying hard not to cry. It's hard though. I have just been sentenced to death.

"Now for the boy," She goes to the other bowl and rummages around. "David Kilpto." Almost immediately a tall boy shouts. Another boy next to him looks very relieved.

"I volunteer." The crowd looks shocked. He's District 12's first volunteer. Ever. He is led up to the stage.

"And what's your name?" Effie asks.

"Gold," He says "Gold Guin." Soon we are led off the stage and into rooms to say goodbye. Jess comes in first.

"I'm so sorry." She whispers, and we hug until the peacekeepers drag her out. I wonder why my parents haven't come next is the twins. They give me their biscuits.

"We didn't have time to eat them. You can have them though." They say. They're trying to be nice. I shake my head.

"I had one earlier." But they insist, so I break them up and we sit, eating them. Then they give me a photo of them, me and Jess. I promise them I'll have it as my token. Then they have to go.

I hope I die soon. It hurts. A lot. I still don't know why my parents never said goodbye. Then a breathe my last.


	18. Chapter 18

**Sorry this ones not as long. Please tell me what you think though.**

 **Chapter 15**

Gold's dad starts to cough violently.

"Let me get you a drink." I offer.

"No," He starts coughing "I'm," Cough "Fine" Cough. I stand up and get a drink anyway. "Thank you."

"It's okay."

"You're just like Gold. He volunteered for me. His mum died when he was young. The Capitol killed her, she was a freedo-" He stops, remembering there were peacekeepers "Rebel." He coughs some more, then takes a sip of water "I'm dying you see. But I can't afford medicine, so he volunteered, so he could afford medicine if he won."

"I thought he was lying." I whisper, I didn't feel any regret when I killed people in the games. But now I'm starting to realise all the people I killed had families. Stories. That are now feeling the consequences.

 **Nearly six months earlier**

 **Gold's POV**

I see the trident coming. I shouldn't have volunteered. I should have known I wouldn't have won. If I hadn't volunteered I could be with dad in his dying moments.

"Dad, I've got you breakfast." I say, bringing it into his room, as he splutters his thanks. He's too ill to have a job so I've had to scrounge for food recently. I know a way to get the money for his medicine though. If I win the games.

"You shouldn't be making me breakfast today. Go and get some rest son." Dad grunts.

"I'm fine." I say. I have to volunteer. Mum was killed by the Capitol for being a freedom fighter. They claim it was an accident, but everyone knows it's a lie. I kept telling her to be more careful, but she wouldn't listen. I go out the house with an empty basket to see if anyone wants laundry doing. Anything for a bit of extra cash. I come back, not very successful. I only have a couple of dresses and a shirt. It won't get me much, but it's better than nothing. I wash them, and them in the sink until all the coal dust that's collected in them from being close to the coal mines have gone and hang them up. Then I go to my friend Derek to see if he has anymore herbs. He sometimes goes into the woods over the fence by the meadow, he collects herbs and plants and occasionally sets traps and catches squirrels and rabbits. He always gets herbs for my dad. Knock, knock, knock.

"Hey Gold." He says.

"Got any herbs?" I ask. He nods.

"Come in, I haven't got many though. I'm going back tomorrow though." He says, going to his kitchen to get some. He hands me some dried up leaves. "That's all I've got, much it up with water and get your dad to drink it." I nod.

"Do you want anything in return?" I ask.

"When I go back to the woods tomorrow, you couldn't pick Sally up from school and bring her here so I can get off straight away could you?" He asks.

"It's fine." I say, before turning to go "Thanks." I run home quickly. The reaping's in an hour. I rip the foul smelling herb up and swirl it around in a glass of water until it's a gloopy green consistency then bring it up to dad.

"Here you go." I say, as he drinks it.

"You shouldn't." He says. We always argue about this.

"I have to go now." I say.

"Good luck," He replies, and I turn to go "And Gold," I turn back.

"Yeah?"

"Don't do anything stupid." I grin.

"I won't." I lie "Love you Dad."

"Me too." He croaks.

I walk along the street towards the square, they take my blood as usual and show me where to go. I am standing amongst a group of other boys who are all about sixteen too. They are all shuffling nervously. We all have to have our names in five times. Mines in ten though because I take tesserae. To feed Dad and I. They show us the usual boring video then Effie reads out the girls' name.

"Daira Dhillon." She looks like she's about to start crying as she stands on stage and is asked her name.

"Thirteen." She says, I'm pretty sure she whispers it, but the mic is powerful and her voice projects across the whole square.

"Now for the boys." Effie says "David Kilpto." It's the boy standing next to me. I'm not surprised really, he's one of the poorest people in the seam and has five younger siblings so I wouldn't want to know how many times his names in because of tesserae.

"I volunteer." I shout and am led onto the stage. I am the first volunteer in District 12 ever. If your name is picked here, you're pretty much dead. We've only ever had two winners. One died ages ago and the other's a drunk. Effie asks my name then we're escorted off stage and we have an hour to say our goodbyes. Only Derek comes to see me.

"Good luck mate." Then he's gone.

I know I'm going to die instantly from the trident. I love you dad.

Darkness.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 16**

"I just wanted to make sure Carter won." I say to Gold's dad.

"I know, he was just doing the same for me." He says, then he starts coughing. This time he doesn't stop. A few blood drops fall onto the napkin he's using to cover his mouth. He can't stop coughing enough to drink some water. Then he does stop coughing. He collapses forwards onto the table, unmoving. I lunge forwards, accidently tipping the water jug over as I went. I grabbed his wrist. No pulse. The peacekeepers come over. He's dead.

"He's dead." I announce. Daira's parents look shocked and a peacekeeper says something into a radio. A few minutes later Rose, Hecate and Stella come in.

"We have to go now." Stella says, looking disgusted at the dead body.

"A man has just died though." I protest. Rose glares at me as if to say 'not here' and pulls me out.

"They'll want to keep it as hushed up as possible." She whispers as we are led back to the train.

"Do we know how he died?" I ask as we sit down to dinner later. Hecate shakes his head.

"Like Rose said earlier, they'll want to keep it hushed up. It's not good publicity." He says. Of course. I pick my plate up and fill it up again.

"I'm going to finish in my room." I say, standing up. Daisy immediately presses the button by the door so it slides open for me. "Thank you." I smile at her. I'm glad she's my personal avox for the victory tour. She's one of the few people that I don't think of Carter when I talk to her. I grab a small stub of charcoal and sketch one handed as I eat in my small room. This will be one of the last. Daisy comes in and I point to a notepad and pen and she started scribbling quickly.

'What happened at 12?' Of course she wouldn't have been told.

"You know the boy tribute?" I ask. She nods "His dad died. He was ill anyway, it was a miracle he survived this long. That's why Gold volunteered, to pay for his medicine."

'You're very good at drawing.' She writes.

"Thanks, I find it helps, just a little." I smile. She nods. "Do you mind going now, I really need some sleep." She smiles one last time and leaves.

The next morning I am woken by Rose and am ordered not to eat breakfast because that's the meal I'll be having with the District 11 tributes' families. By the time I make my speech on stage I am starving.

"It is an honour to be here in District 11," I begin. I am reading off a card to the crowd, I'm trying to get through this as quickly as possible so I can have breakfast. On the male side there are quite a few red eyed people standing there. Lots of older, who I assume are siblings and three or four adults, holding their hands. On the female tribute's side are lots of similar looking children and a man and a woman – a presume their parents and siblings.

After the speech I am led to the District 11 justice building and into a large room. The families are led in soon after. The teenagers look at the food greedily, as if they are starving and can't wait to tuck in. As soon as I pour myself a hot chocolate they all dive in.

"Go easy, you're not use to rich food." One of the adults, the female's mum says. They ignore her and carry on stuffing food into their mouths. One of them looked up at me.

"He was so harmless, he was always so shy, especially when he started growing. He never wanted to hurt anyone." One of the women who was standing on Haven's side said. I smile weakly.

"Were you his mum?" I ask. She doesn't look as similar as the other women there, but she looks like she loved him more. She shrugs.

"Adopted, my sister," Here she nods to the one who looked more similar to him "Didn't want another child because they had five children already. And me and Min can't have kids obviously." She smiles at her partner, who gives her a watery smile back.

"So I asked them if they wanted to have him." Haven's real mum, Amaranth, finishes.

 **Nearly six months earlier**

 **Haven's POV**

I run as soon as the cannon goes, I just want to get away from the violence but one of the career girls is running at me, I saw her train, I have no hope.

Bam!

"Urgh, stupid doorframe." I mutter, as I bash my head against it walking into the kitchen.

"Did it shrink as you walked through it again?" Min laughed. As I rubbed my head with my arm, trying to ease the pain.

"Yeah, that doorframe's got it in for me." I grin, it's going to leave a pretty good bruise.

"Here, put this on it." Riana holds out some ice cubes she's just grabbed out the freezer for me.

"Thanks," I say. I'm not related to Min but she's basically my mum. My real mum didn't want me but her sister, Riana wanted a kid but cos she's with Min they can't have their own kids so I live with them now. I still visit my real mum and five other siblings almost every day though.

After I ate my breakfast, that consisted of two large bowls of heated corn mush, I go to Aramanth's house to get ready for the reaping with my siblings, it's kind of a tradition.

"Haven's here." Freddy called as I came into their house.

"Go and wash." Aramanth says as soon as she sees me. I roll my eyes. "Don't roll your eyes at me young man, you may be a lot taller than me, but I can still give you a good walloping." I grin and go into the bathroom, once again bashing my head on the as I go through the doorframe. Soon I am washed and am wearing a black suit it is several inches too small, so it doesn't cover my ankles or wrists.

When we get to the reapings Freddy and Kala, my eighteen year old twin siblings are assigned to a pen just behind me and I have to stand awkwardly amongst boys my own age. I tower above all of them, they all have it in for me though.

"Hey, Haven, is it true that you're a freak cos you have two mums." One calls, I just ignore it, I hate fights.

"How's the weather up there?" Another calls. Then the video starts playing and they finally shut up. They call the girl's name it's some random girl I've never heard of. Then it's time for the male tribute to be called

"Haven Thorner." Why me? I'm a pacifist for goodness' sake. My name is in the minimum amount of times. I have been sentenced to death.

"Hey, we might have a winner this year, just trample someone to death." One of the jerks I stood next to called up as I am escorted to the stage.

"I'll see you soon." Freddy smiles weakly as the hour for saying goodbye is almost up.

"Yeah, see you." I say as the peacekeepers come in to take me to the station. We both know we're lying though. I hope Min and Riana have a happier life now though, they never wanted a son with giantism. Who knows, maybe they'll adopt a nice normal boy from the orphanage.

I feel a shoot of pain across my neck as the career girl reaches me. So much for seeing Freddy soon.

Back to the victory tour:

I look at the toddler crawling on the floor

"What's his name?" I ask, trying to lead the conversation away from their son so I didn't end up with three emotional women crying the eyes out. I mean I get they're sad, but I grieve in private usually, or at least not with strangers.

"Thresh, we adopted him from the orphanage." Riana says.

 **Sorry it's not amazing, it just didn't flow today. Hope you enjoyed it. And yes the Thresh they adopted is Thresh from the 74** **th** **hunger games, I just wanted to have some connections to the book series. Anyways hope you enjoyed and please drop a review.**


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 17**

"He's very cute." I say, as he starts tugging at one of the peacekeeper's gun, he immediately pulled it away.

"Thresh honey, don't do that." Min said. I turn to one of the female tribute's sisters.

"What's your name?" I ask, trying to make it less awkward.

"Alicia." She says so quietly it was almost a whisper.

"That's a really pretty name." I say.

"Thank you, I always preferred Larkin's though." I smile sadly at her. "It was my fault she died," She whispered "She wouldn't let me take any tesserae, so her name was in over ten times."

"Hush, Alicia." Her dad says.

"She was just trying to protect you." I say.

 **Nearly six months earlier**

 **Larkin's POV**

I am fighting two of the careers, I can't keep this up much longer though, I haven't got my best weapon, throwing knives, so I am having to make do with a sword. I'm mainly surviving through luck though. I need to escape soon though.

"Alicia, there's no way I'm letting you take tesserae, it'd be too late now anyway." I say, hugging her hard.

"But Larkin, what if you get picked?" Alicia, my twelve year old sister looks up to me, her dark brown eyes large and sad.

"Then I'll do my best to get back." I say.

"Alicia, get down here now!" Mum shouts.

"Oh no." She groans. "What have I done now?"

"Alicia!" Mum screams up again "Not in five minutes. Now!"

"Coming," She calls, and leaps off her bed.

"To be honest, I'd rather take my chances in the hunger games than face the wrath of mum." I grin, before following her to see what it's about.

"Why haven't you cleaned the bathroom like I asked you to three days ago?" Mum yelled as Alicia went into the kitchen.

"Erm, well I forgot." Alicia stammered.

"Go and clean it now." Alicia groaned.

"But I need to get ready for the reaping." She protested. I smile to myself.

"Well you should have thought about that earlier," She replies " And Larkin, you can stop smirking in the doorway and make Delia breakfast." She adds. I roll my eyes but start heating up corn and adding water to make the mushy stuff we have for breakfast in 11. When it's fully heated through and as gloopy as mud I pour it into a bowl and call my five year old sister, Delia, down.

"I don't like this corn, I only eat it with sugar." She complains.

"Then don't eat it." I say. So she picks it up and chucks it. Straight at me, I duck, and the bowl goes sailing through the door as my mum opens it and splatters her with the hot corn mixture on the head. Delia giggles.

"What on earth is going on in here?" She screams. "Larkin, explain."

"She wouldn't eat her corn because it had no sugar on it, so she chucked it at me, but I ducked." I say.

"That's not what happened." Delia shouts "She said that if I didn't eat it she's force it down my throat." She lies.

"What?!" I exclaim "You little liar." She always does this. Luckily, mum usually sees through it straight away.

"Delia, Larkin's name is in the reaping more times so you could have that food, do you really think it's fair to waste it. By throwing that corn, your basically throwing away her life. What do you have to say?" She lectures.

"I hate you!" Delia wails.

"Go and clean up the floor and stand in the corner when you've done." Mum tells her "And Larkin honey, please could you wash up?" I nod and start rinsing out the old scratched pan. "I've put you and Alicia's outfits out for you."

"I was just going to wear what I did last year." I say.

"It's getting too small for you, if you're going to the Capitol, I don't want people saying your poor. We're not, we're just a bit tight that's all." I nod and go and find a plain white cotton dress on my bed. It's nothing compared to outfits in the Capitol, but I like it. It goes down to about my knees. I can hear Mum yelling at Delia downstairs. I have a feeling she's going to be doing quite a few chores in the next few weeks.

Soon she is yelling at Alicia and I to get downstairs.

"Get your shoes on, we need to leave now." Soon Delia is holding Dad's hand and Dale, my one year old brother is wrapped up in a grubby grey blanket in Mum's arms. Me and Alicia are walking slightly ahead of the rest.

"Larkin, I'm scared." Alicia whispers, slipping her pale hand in mine.

"Don't worry, you have one name in there, one amongst thousands, it's never going to be yours. And if it is, I wouldn't let you go." I smile down at her.

"You'd do that for me?" She asks, her eyes wide.

"Of course." I say, we soon get there and the peacekeepers take a prick of my blood and direct me to the other girls my age and I watch Alicia being herded over to towards the front with all the other twelve year old girls. I really hope it's not her. Or me, I don't even want to know how many times my name's in. I'm not really paying attention, there's no point, it's the same stuff every year. How the districts rebelled, the dark days and how panem rose out the ashes and now we have to pay for our ancestors' crimes.

"Larkin Dulaney." The escort reads out. What! No! I walk up to the stage trembling.

"Larkin, please come back." Alicia says as soon as she's come to the room where we say goodbye. She flings herself on me, weeping.

"I will," I whisper, burying my face into his shoulder "I'm good with throwing knives remember, I practise just in case. Don't take any tesserae though, you'll just about to cope without it."

"I'm so sorry Larkin." Delia cries, after Alicia left and she, Mum, Dad and Dale came in "I shouldn't have thrown the corn." I bend down and pick her up.

"It's not your fault. I love you remember that, in case I, in case I don't make it." I whisper, then Dale grabs my finger one last time. Mum and Dad give me one last teary embrace and the peacekeepers drag them out. None of my friends come to say goodbye, we've all agreed none of us will come and say goodbye if we're picked, it would make thinks harder. So when my parents leave, I sit on the bench and weep. Then I am taken to the train station.

I decide to make a run for it. There's an excruciating pain on my head, and I collapse. I hope Delia and Alicia aren't watching.

 **I hope you enjoyed. Please drop a review and tell me what you think. I'm thinking about starting a fic after this one involving a quell, but I have no ideas for what the quell twist could be, so if you have any ideas leave them in the reviews. Also I am admin on a Facebook page but there's barley any likes so could you all like it? I'd really appreciate it, I post THG stuff and tonnes of other fandom stuff. Here's the link :D: RIP-feels-when-you-join-a-fandom-1005056712946597/?ref=aymt_homepage_panel**


	21. Chapter 21

**I did my best with Lexy, but I found her a really difficult character to write, I'd love it if you started leaving reviews telling me whether you thought I portrayed your character well. Also just a warning there is a whipping in this chapter, it doesn't go into any great detail, but you have been warned, so please don't start hating. Please carry on leaving quell ideas and enjoy!**

 **Chapter 18**

"Alicia honey, we need to get going now." Her mum gave me a glare "We have to get you to school." I think she blames me for her daughter's death. I didn't even kill her. I could have probably stopped it though.

"I'm still hungry though." She complained, stuffing another bread roll into her mouth and started chewing quickly.

"Take a couple of rolls to eat on the way." She says, so Alicia grabs some and she and her family walk out.

"We should probably get going too." Riana says "We don't want to be late for work." Soon I am back on the train heading for District 10, we shouldn't get there until dinner, so I have most of the day off. This isn't physically tiring, but it's draining me of all my energy just the same. It'll get worse tomorrow when I get to District 10, I killed both their tributes, about ten seconds into the games.

"I never spoke to your tributes," I say to the sullen looking crowd "But they seemed like nice people, and I'm sure they were, they didn't seem particularly strong though, and they went quickly." I looked at the families of the fallen tributes "I hope that now the games are over, you can grieve in peace and move on." Then I have dinner with the families of the tributes.

"Hello." I smile weakly as they come in. The female tribute's parents look angry at me.

"You could have stopped her from dying." They say. I should have known this would happen at some point. I'm surprised it hasn't happened before now. I didn't even see her die.

"I- I'm not sure how," I say "The only reason I know that it was Jay and Coral killed her, and her ally," I nod at the male tribute's family, but they seem more concerned about eating as much food as possible "Was because after the games I watched the hunger games in three hours at one of my interviews with Caesar Flickerman." I say.

"She wanted to ally with you though." He shouts.

"Sir, would you please calm down," I say "I understand your upset, I lost my brother too. I had nothing to do with her death."

 **Six months earlier**

 **Lexi's POV**

"Why do I have to go to the reapings, I'm not even going to get picked." I complain.

"I know sweetie," Mum says hugging me "It's just one of those things."

"It's going to be one of the poor kids that's going to be picked." I say "I don't get why everyone gets so worked up about it, if you win, you become rich and famous." This is the first time I've been in the reapings. My name's only in once. My parents don't really talk to me about it much. I don't really see it as that big a deal, I mean seriously, it's just a TV show. And if you win you spend your whole life bathing in glory. I'm not going to volunteer though, it's too much effort. I really can't be bothered to do much to be honest. It's so tiring, I mean why do something yourself when you can pay someone to do it for you.

"It usually is." Dad says "Anyway, it's an excuse for you to get dressed up." He grins. I smile, he knows how I love to follow the Capitol fashion and dress up.

"Go up to your room, there's a present on your bed for you." Mum says, I wonder what it is. I run up the stairs to my large bedroom, and laying on my bed is a beautiful bright pink dress. It flows down to my ankle and has sequins all over it. I squeal in delight. Most people in my class would spend years saving for something like this. They're such peasants, they should just work harder, like my parents do. I go and take a bath, using my special coconut conditioner so that my blonde hair goes silky soft when it dries. When I've dried I brush my long hair so it flows down my back and put my dress on.

"You look amazing." Mum says as I go downstairs "Do you want some money to go and buy yourself some nicer shoes to go with it?" I smile, I know just how to manipulate my parents.

"These shoes don't really match, but it's just for an hour or two. I'm sure it'll be fine." I reply.

"Sweetie, they look hideous with that dress, go and buy yourself some more, we don't want you looking like a tramp if you are reaped." She grinned.

"Are you sure?" I ask, with a sweet innocent little girl smile on my face.

"It's fine," She insists, handing me over a few ten dollar notes.

"Thanks mum, see you after the reaping." I say, slamming the door behind me. I realise to get to the shoe shop and get to the reaping on time I'll have to go through the poor area of 10. Urgh. I hope my dress doesn't get ruined. I hate going through there, people always beg you for money. Two older boys walk up to me as I weave between two houses, if you'd even call them houses.

"Excuse me miss," One says "Have you got any spare change." Why do they always ask me. Then I see a peacekeeper, and head in their direction, pretending it was the way I was going.

"Please miss, we have no money." The second boy begs. We are just about to pass the peacekeeper, so loudly I say:

"Please stop harassing me, begging is illegal, as you very much know." The peacekeeper glares at the two boys.

"Are these two bothering you missy?" He asks. The two boys try to dart off, but he grabs them both by the wrist.

"Yes sir," I say "They keep begging me for money."

"What are your names?" They reluctantly tell him, and he calls another peacekeeper over to hold the two boys. One makes a dash for it, and shoves me over in the process. My dress gets ripped slightly at the hem and has sprinkles of mud all over it. He is soon recaptured and the first peacekeeper taps their names into his little machine thingy he carries around with him. This is the second time they've been caught begging.

"Please let us go," They beg "We won't do it again." The peacekeeper shakes his head.

"I'm here to enforce the law. You two know the punishment for begging – a dozen of the best. And you," Here he points to the one who shoved me over "Can have half a dozen extra for pushing this young lady over and ripping her lovely dress. We can't do it in the square because of the reapings, so we'll do it here." The two peacekeepers drag them over to the nearest lamppost and ties the first one's wrists to it, so that he didn't run, then he took out his whip. The boy whimpered in pain at the first lash, by the third he was begging for mercy by his twelfth his back had blood seeping through his shirt. The peacekeeper whipping him untied him and let him go. A crowd had appeared by this time, so when the boy gave a howl at the first lash someone yelled:

"Give him more for every noise he makes." Most of the crowd laughed. By his eighteenth lash he was howling for mercy. I turned around quickly and went on my way. I'd be cutting it very fine to get my shoes and get to the reapings on time, but those peasants need to be taught a lesson.

"Ladies first." Our escort, Jallie Hearth calls out later at the reaping, after showing us some weird video about us needing to be punished – I suppose it's all part of the games. I am surrounded by girls my age. They seem nervous, I wonder why. Jallie pulls a slip out "Lexi Fry." Urgh. This is going to be so annoying. I have to waste a month filming and stuff. I could get even richer though. I walk up smiling as I went.

"I'm sorry Lexy," Mum says rushing into the room I say my goodbyes in. I wonder why there's a peacekeeper outside. "We should have told you, we were just trying to protect you."

"Told me what?" I ask "Mum, I'm going to be famous."

"No," She wept "We wanted to protect you, we didn't think you'd ever be picked."

"What are you going on about?" I ask, they're acting seriously weird.

"Lexy, the games, they're not just games," Dad says "They're real, people actually die." At this point the peacekeepers come and tell them their visiting times up. This can't be true. The Capitol would never do this to us. A while later a small boy comes in and hands me an envelope. It's from my parents, they must have paid him to give it to me. Inside there is a sheet of paper that says:

Dearest Lexy,

We were just trying to protect you, try and get as many sponsors as possible. Don't go to the cornucopia, try and ally, not with the careers though. We thought you might like this as your district token.

I shake the envelope and find a small silver pendant. Then the boy leaves, wishing me luck. I know I'm going to die though. Until a few minutes ago I didn't even know what the games really are. I just hope when it comes, it comes quickly. I know the careers drag them out sometimes, I just thought it was fake sometimes, now I know it's not.


	22. Chapter 22

**Sorry it's short, I have too much to do. Please review, they make me write more :D enjoy.**

 **Chapter 20**

"You didn't even tell your daughter what the hunger games really were." The boy's mum finally spoke.

"That's none of your business," Lexy's dad growled.

"Come on, we must be going." Her mum stands up, and although he has barely touched any of his food her husband follows.

"Gypsy, always had bad luck," His mum said, taking a small bottle, of alcohol I presume, and pours some of it into her drink. She looks like a heavy drinker.

"He was convinced he'd done something awful in a previous life." His older sister sniggers, I don't know why they're being so flippant about his death. I was devastated when Carter died. I still am.

 **Six months earlier**

 **Gypsy's POV**

I wake up to a bright light.

"Get up lazy bones," Mum yells at me "You need to get all your chores done before the reaping." When I take a couple of seconds to get up, she gives me a sharp slap around the face and shuffles back to her room. She's probably still got a bad hangover from last night. She went out and drinking and didn't get back until past midnight. Again. I shuffle downstairs, still half asleep and see my three older sisters eating breakfast. Great.

"Have fun in the reaping." Sasha calls out.

"How many times is it your name's in it this year?" Greta taunts, while Irene gives one of her little piggy snorts.

"Shove off." I say.

"That's not friendly, midget." Irene grins. I hate her. It's not my fault I'm 15 and barely 5 foot. I ignore her and shovel down my breakfast so I can get on with my chores and get out of there as quickly as possible. I can't wait until I'm old enough until I can start working and leave home. It will be bliss. People at school pick on me too. They think I'm a freak because I'm a midget. I hate them all.

By the time I've cleaned the kitchen, mopping the floor twice because Greta deliberately spilt food on it straight after I did it the first time, I decide to go to the reaping. It means I'm missing lunch, but I'd rather go hungry than stay in with my family on the day of the reaping. My sisters make fun of me because they're past reaping age and my mum's just generally abusive. Mainly if she doesn't have enough money to get drunk. As I'm walking through the town to get to the square to sign in, I see a girl in a ridiculous dress standing next to a peacekeeper as he whips two boys that are in my class at school. Maybe someone else is getting bad karma for once.

"Give him one for every noise he makes." I shout to the peacekeeper, before disappearing into the crowds. The boy the peacekeeper had been whipping when I went past always takes my lunch and says it's because 'big, strong lads need more food than little titches like you.' The crowd cheers and jeers at my comment and I soon reach the square.

There are peacekeepers everywhere. There always is on reaping day. They always expect riots then. I sign in and then I am directed to the area where all boys of my age will stand. I'm really early because I didn't bother having lunch, but my pen soon starts filling up. One boy asks me if I'm sure I'm in the right pen. He knows I'm in his class. I tell him I hope he gets picked. Our escort comes up and shows us the video we get shown every year.

"Lexy Fry." Jallie, the District 10 escort, calls out after plucking a name out of the girls' glass ball. A small girl walks up. It's the girl that was standing by the peacekeeper, she's still in her hideous pink sequin dress, she doesn't seem upset in any way. "And now for the girls," Jallie announces, tottering over to the boys' reaping ball. She puts her hand in and slowly pulls one out. I hope it's not mine. My name's in there four times because I have to, and five more times for tesserae for me and my family "Gypsy Broadbent." She says. No! I suppose this is karma for wanting the boy being whipped to be whipped harder. I walk slowly up to the stage, and I have to shake hands with Lexy. She smiles to me. Maybe we can be allies.

Then we are led off the stage to the rooms where we say goodbye. No one comes to say goodbye. I wasn't expecting them to. My family hate me, my mum wanted another girl and my sisters just like to pick on me. I have no friends at school, everyone picks on me because I'm so short. I can't remember what my dad was like, he died when I was three.


	23. Chapter 23

**I've been too long updating I know, but I haven't had chance to write, it may start being this long between updates more often. Jailnne, I hope you didn't mind me changing their name slightly to make them male, and I hope I wrote them how you imagined. Please R &R. Enjoy. **

**Chapter 21**

"How did they manage to keep what the hunger games really were from Lexy?" I ask, curiously.

"How should we know?" One of Gypsy's sisters replied, grumpily. Then there is an awkward silence at the table until we leave. District 9 is a twelve hour journey away, because the fields for the animals kept at ten and the grain fields that District 9 work in stretch out so far. This will be the first district where I actually killed their tribute. I killed both of their tributes. In about ten seconds.

"Now, I'm sure you'll get used to it the further into the victory tour we go, but remember to be sensitive to the families of those you killed." Stella says, once we've eventually got there. I nod, not really taking it all in. I didn't think twice about killing in the games, but now? Now I'm seeing the aftermath of it all. I think I regret killing them all, just a little. But I regret Carter not winning even more.

The boy's – Emmet – mum is crying when we first meet her, both of her hands are clutching the hands a small child. One is a girl, she looks slightly older, and a young boy. Behind them is a boy that looks about 13 or 14. The two small children glare at me.

"Why did you kill my brother?" The girl glares up at me.

"I-I," I stammer, I don't want to upset her "I was trying to protect my brother. I wanted to make sure he would get home." I finally say.

"He wasn't attacking Carter though." This kid is annoying.

"I didn't know whether he would attack Carter later on," I reply "And he run straight at me." I pointed out.

"Because you just attacked his ally." The older boy spoke for the first time.

"It was the games. People die." I say, before adding "I know that just as much as you." So I don't sound heartless.

"He was trying to protect her." He growled.

"I was protecting Carter," I say "I never wanted to win."

"Why did you volunteer then?" He is really getting on my nerves.

"I would have never volunteered if I knew Carter's name was going to be reaped."

"Why did no one volunteer for him, you come from a career district?" He asks.

"About eighteen years ago we had an illness in District 1, it meant that lots of people couldn't have children, so there aren't as many children around my age now, but a couple of years ago peacekeepers accidently leaked that it was actually a genetic disease. That the Capitol gave us, deliberately. It was because there was a few rebel groups in District 1 causing some trouble. They punished the whole district for it." I begin "There weren't many boys of the best age to volunteer, and lots of them were angry with the Capitol, so it wasn't really surprising that there wasn't a male volunteer."

 **Six months earlier**

 **Emmet's POV**

We agreed to try and grab some supplies and get out fast. We don't want to be caught up in the bloodbath. We both know if we do, we're dead. I can see Autumn, my district partner and ally, is getting ready to run for a spear. She doesn't see that the girl from 1 is also going to run for it, I hope Autumn makes it. The girl from 1 got an 11 on training, the highest this year. I know if it comes to it, I will sacrifice myself for Autumn. Not because I'm close with her, but my dad taught me the true meaning of sacrifice. When I was young I stole some grain and got caught, but my dad said it was him, I watched him get shot before me. It was all my fault. Now I am going to sacrifice myself so that Autumn wins, then my dad will be proud of me. Boom! I run for a backpack, I put it on my back, and turn just in time to see the District 1 girl stabbing Autumn with the spear.

"No!" I scream, I have to help her. I run towards them. The spear is flying towards me there's no time to dodge out of the way. It lodges in my stomach. Maybe Autumn can get away now. She's not moving though. I was too late. Dad might be proud of me anyway. I collapse on the floor, blood oozing out of the wound, collecting around the end of the spear. The District 1 girl looks triumphant "I'll be with you now dad. I sacrificed myself like you." I whisper. She runs off, I smile at Autumn, she's almost gone.

"Yo-you shoul-shouldn't." She gargles.

"I-it's okay." I whisper back, then she closes her eyes and doesn't move again. I failed.

 **The reaping day**

"Ferro, will you please clear this mess up?" I yell at my younger brother, we share a room and he drives me nuts. He leaves his dirty clothes everywhere, and refuses to clear them up.

"I'm busy." He calls up the stairs to me just as my mum walks in.

"Emmet, I want this mess cleared up before the reaping." Mum calls. This is so unfair!

"It's Ferro's mess." I groan.

"Well it won't hurt you to clear it up for once." Mum says "Ferro is getting Lance and Celosia breakfast." Urgh. Why do I always have to clear up Ferro's dirty underwear. I slowly edge towards a pair of grey socks that have fluff all over them and gingerly pick them up. They stink. I wirnkle my nose in disgust. When the floor is finally cleared I go downstairs to mayhem. Celosia is throwing a massive hissy fit about Mum tying her hair up into plaits.

"I don't want it up!" She bawled, flapping her arms around trying to get Mum away from her.

"It's just so you look good for the reaping." Mum replied, ignoring her pummelling fists.

"I'm not even in the reaping." She complained.

"You still go though, and hold my hand, and there are rumours going around that because I'm a single mum I'm not coping. We need to prove them wrong." She says. Oh no. I hate it when we're reminded about Dad. It was all my fault he died. I stole grain, he took the blame. I can never forget the gunshot, the blood dripping down his forehead. And Mum's agonising screams, as the peacekeepers restrained her from running forwards to stop them. I know if my name's reaped I won't win. My dad taught me the meaning of sacrifice, so I can use it to make sure my district wins if I am ever reaped.

"I'm going now," I call, about an hour before the reaping. I always leave early, so I can visit Dad.

"See you," Ferrosays "And Emmet?" I stop "Good luck." I smile.

"You too." I say, and walk out into the bitterly cold air. The wind is strong and crisp, but I turn my collar up and walk up the cobbled street up to the cemetery.

I've been so many times I know exactly where his crumbled stone head stone is. We could barely afford one so it's simple, but I know all the cracks in it from weathering well. I sit by the grass in front of it and talk to him.

Far too soon it is time for the reaping. I get up and go to the square, I don't want to think about the reaping. My name is in quite a few times. We have a new escort this year Leonard Geir. He comes onto the stage, he has lilac hair and looks completely ridiculous. We go through the usual bore, a long speech followed by a long video.

"No, time for the reaping." Leonard says, brightly "Now, ladies first." He goes over to the glass bowl on one side of the stage and picks a name out. He unfolds it carefully, and looks at it stunned "Oops. I have appeared to have made a mistake, I guess it's gentlemen first." He looked up nervously "Sorry about this, but the male tribute for District 9 is," He pauses, please not Ferro or me "Emmet Thomas" He reads. No! I have to go up though, I need to protect the female tribute, whoever she turns out to be.

"Please come back." Lance says. I nod.

"I'll try," I say stroking his head "Put remember I love you, I always love you and I'm just trying to protect you." At least I'll be with Dad now, and I can watch down on my siblings.

I'm about to go now. I know it, and before the darkness takes me I have one last thought: hello Dad.


	24. Chapter 24

**Not the longest, but I hope you enjoy, and please review. I also want to add that I have started my quell fic, and have uploaded chapter one, if you want to read (I won't abandon this one though). Thank you for your ideas Redwut, I have used them. I also want to say thank you for all your encouraging reviews, they are what keeps me writing. The next update probably won't be out for a few days.**

 **Chapter 22**

"Your brother died trying to protect my sister." The girl's – Autumn – sister says.

"That's not the point, killing's wrong." Ferro says.

"I was trying to make sure my brother survived. If your brother won by killing I expect you wouldn't be telling him that." I say.

"Emmet wouldn't have killed." He growls.

"If it was between going home and not, I think everyone would kill." Autumn's sister says.

 **Six months earlier**

 **Autumn's POV**

"Risa , hurry up!" I scream, bashing on the bathroom door "I really need to pee."

"Er, gross." She calls back.

"Everyone does it." I reply "Now hurry up." I bash my fist on the door again.

"I'll just be a minute." She calls. Yeah right. One minute in Risa time is ten hours in normal time. She eventually comes out with her hair wrapped up in a towel to dry it. Urgh. Why couldn't she have done that once she had come out. I dash inside.

Soon I am standing under a steaming hot shower. My family is quite lucky like that, my mum has a good job so we can afford a shower with hot water, most families have a metal bath tub that they fill with water from the kettle. I rinse my hair under it, trying to comb it through with my fingers. Then I step out and carefully dry my long straggly hair with a grey towel, then I brush it so it is silky soft and pull it up into a high ponytail. Now I'm more awake, I remember what day it is: reaping day. My name is in six times. Four because I have to, and twice for tesserae for my mum and I. We could afford to not take tesserae, but I know mum works hard so we can have luxuries like the shower, so to make it easier, and I take tesserae. I always take mum's, so she only has her name in one extra time.

I don't think I'll get picked. The odds are in my favour, as the Capitol would say. There are lots of eighteen year olds in 9 that have their name in six times because they have to and then six or seven more times for tesserae for them and their families. Risa and I have made an agreement though, if one of our name's gets picked, the other won't volunteer. I don't think either of us would break it. It's just in case, so the other doesn't feel guilty their whole life. Mum starts to bang on the bathroom door.

"Breakfast's on the table." She calls "I have to go out to work now." In 9, we have strict dates by which we have to complete the quota set by the Capitol, her field is nearing one of these dates, so she's been working lots this past week. She's also been working weird hours because it means she gets paid more. It's easier for her to do that now we're both older. When we were little, she couldn't leave us for long at the week-end to work, so it was hard for her. Especially when my dad died when I was two.

"Bye." I say, unlocking the bathroom door and coming out.

"I won't see you before the reaping," She says "But good luck, and I'll see you later, yeah?" I nod. We always try to be optimistic about the reaping, but we all know that someone has to be picked, and it could be me or Risa.

Risa and I eat in silence, then she goes off with some friends. I don't really have friends. The girls in my class are weird and immature and boy mad. Every time a good looking boy walks past, they blush, start giggling really loudly and try to flirt with him. The boys are just stupid. I've always been a loner, but I prefer it that way. I think if I was reaped, I wouldn't have an alliance. Or at least not a big one. I might ally with my district partner, it'd depend who it was.

When I'm at the reaping later on, I have to stand amongst the girls my age. They are looking over to the boys sections and pointing out the fit ones. It's so annoying, one of them might be about to have their names called out to be put into an arena where they will fight to the death, and all they care about is which boys are the hottest. The boys are just mucking around too. We have a new escort this year and he makes a right dog's dinner out of it. I mean come on, how difficult is it to make a small speech and pick two names and read them out. When he says:

"Ladies first." He picks a name from the boy's reaping bowl. It's a boy my age called Emmet. He's a bit of a loner too. I think his dad was killed by peacekeepers when he was young. Then it's time for the girls' reaping, he picks the name out and reads it out, please not Risa or me "Autumn Kane." Of course it's me. Of course. I always have bad luck. I can see Risa as I walk up to the stage, I can see her about to open her mouth to volunteer for me. I shake my head at her. Her mouth closes again.

I have an alliance with Emmet, he seems like a decent guy. We have both agreed to grab a few supplies from the cornucopia, and run. I can see a spear a few meters away, we could do with a weapon, I get ready to run for it. There is a woods to one side, and a mountain on the other. I think we'll probably stay in the woods. Boom! I dart towards the spear, but the District 1 girl reaches it first. She sees me, and stabs me hard in the stomach with me. I fall to the ground immediately, then I see Emmet. He has a backpack and is charging towards us.

"No!" He shouts. The spear flies through the air, into his stomach. Why did he do that? I'm clearly going to die.

"I'll be with you now dad. I sacrificed myself like you." I hear him whisper. The girl runs off, I smile at Emmet, he's almost gone to

"Yo-you shoul-shouldn't." I manage to say, with the last of my strength.

"I-it's okay." He whispers back. Then I close my eyes. Forever.


	25. Chapter 25

**Sorry it's been so long, I've got no internet at the moment so I can only update when I go to the library, but I didn't know the info about the District 8 tributes cos I had no internet, I've got screenshots of the next couple now though. Updates should be more regular once I get internet back on the 1** **st** **April. Thank you to everyone who's reviewed and please continue to do so hope you enjoy**

 **Chapter 23**

"Emmet wouldn't." His brother growls, before standing up "I have to go now." He takes his younger siblings'' hands and walks out, followed by his mum.

"I barely had time to say goodbye." Autumn's mum says. "I had to go back to work."

"I should have volunteered." Autumn's sister says. The rest of the conversation is Autumn's sister crying and her mum comforting her. Then I am soon back on the train. I haven't drawn for a couple of days, so I pick up a long stick of graphite and start sketching on a rough sheet of paper. Drawing helps me relax. It's also my 'talent'. Every victor has to have one. And if you don't? I don't know. Everyone does. Every victor in all the 62 years that the hunger games have taken place, every single one has had one.

District 8 will be easier than 9, I didn't kill their tributes. I don't think I ever even spoke to them. It means they can't blame me for their tributes death. Well maybe not. I mean it didn't exactly stop that women and her husband in 10.

The female tribute has a younger brother, I wonder if he would have done what Carter did to save her. She was probably reaped because she had her name in more times to support them. The boy only has a mum and a dad but no siblings. They look like they work at one of the better factories in 8.

"Hello," I smile at the girl's brother "What's your name?" He cowers behind his mum.

"Mummy said not to say anything." He whispers.

"Honey, I didn't say that, I said not to be a chatterbox like you usually are. I don't think Sapphire wants to know your entire life story, which is what most people end up knowing when they start a conversation with you." His mum smiles at me "Go on and tell her your name though." He came out of his mum's shadow, sucking his thumb. He could have only been seven or eight.

"Toby Osbourne." He announces, looking up at me with big grey blue eyes.

"I think that's a brilliant name." I smile, he reminds me of Carter when he was young. I pull my chair down and sit on it.

"Daddy, can I sit next to Sapphire?" Toby turned to face his dad. His dad was quite tall and had a small raggedy beard, his eyes were red and swollen. He looked down at his son lovingly.

"Why don't you ask her?" Toby turns to me.

"Of course, I'd love you to sit next to me." He looks delighted.

"Yay!" He exclaimed "You're the best." He scrambles to the chair to my left and his parents shoot me grateful looks, as they go to their seats. I get the feeling I would have ended up sitting next to Toby whether I wanted to or not. I notice Toby's mum has a crutch, but it looks like she needs a walker or something. They probably can't afford it though. I pick my fork up and start eating the green beans on my plate. "Urgh, why do you eat the green beans, they're gross." Toby asks. I smile, remembering how I used to think that.

"Because, they're healthy so I have to eat them. But I eat them first so I can save the yummy food until last." I say.

"Hannah did that," His smile fades a little "I get upset that she's gone sometimes, but she wouldn't want me to cry about it, so I try not to, in case she's watching over me." He looks at me after shovelling a forkful of chicken "Do you think your brother's watching over you?" He asks.

"Hush, now Toby." His mum says, she turns to me "Sorry, he can be a little insensitive sometimes."

"It's fine," I turn to Toby "Yes, I think he's with your sister now, and they're watching us." I feel a tear welling up in my eyes, so I turn away, and have a drink.

 **Hannah's POV**

Toby wakes me up a couple of hours before the reaping. He can be really annoying, but he's a sweet kid at times. Like when he went around District 8, offering to do weeding for people so that we'd have extra money to by some nicer food than usual for after the reaping. Like making sure I got a lay in on one of the few days I don't work. He knows I like to sleep, but I have to get up early to go to training. Everyone who wants to work in the factories, which is 90% of District 8's population has to undergo training, to make sure everything we make is to a high enough standard. In a few weeks, when I turn 15, I finish my training and start work at a factory that manufactures peacekeeper uniforms.

I go downstairs to eat lunch, I've completely missed breakfast because Toby let me sleep so late. That means there's less money wasted on food though. I'm trying to save money from odd jobs around the district to by mum a cheap, Zimmer-frame. She has problems with her ankles, so it's difficult for her to walk, and she only has a crutch. We can't afford anything else. Hopefully we'll be able to get one once I've got my first wages.

When I was younger I was selfish, if I got any money, I would spend it on paints for myself. I love painting. I pretend I don't like it, so my family don't feel bad about me not being able to do it. I might just about to be able to afford some really cheap paints once I've got enough money to stop taking tesserae and have brought Mum a Zimmer-frame.

"Toby, for being a good boy, and letting me sleep in, would you like me to take you to the park for half an hour?" I ask him. He looks up at me delighted.

"Thank you." His eyes are dancing with happiness.

"You have to be good and leave when I say though because it'll be tight fitting it in around the reaping." I add.

"Yes." He grins.

"And no kicking mud at me, I don't want you to get my only skirt ruined." He nods, and runs up to his room to put his shoes on. "Calm down, we're not going yet, let me eat and get dressed."

"You're a good sister." Dad smiles at me. "You always try to make him happy."

"Seeing him happy makes me happy." I say, and realise it's true. Soon Toby is tugging at my hand and is dragging me down the street towards the tiny park. It only has a small patch of grass, a couple of rusty swings and a slide, but he loves it. It's his only joy in District 8. He gets bullied at school, and the rest of eight is boring and has no life or colour. In the park, there are shouts of joy and happiness from the other kids running around. There was a petition a year or two back. People wanted another playground, but they told us it wasn't feasible. People started collecting any money they could spare until they had enough, and gave it to the mayor so she could sort it out. She told them it wasn't likely to happen. She was right. The Capitol said there was nowhere to put it. I think they must be blind though, there's a large flat wasteland by all the factories where it could be. We never got our money back either. The mayor got a huge extension on his house that year though. It didn't take us long to fit the pieces together.

The extension got vandalised long ago. There's only a brick wall left of it now, and on it in red paint is written 'We asked for a safe place for our children to play." The mayor's tried to wash it off, but it won't come off. There's a rumour going around now that our taxes keep rising to pay for the damage. I wouldn't be surprised if it were true.

Toby runs around, and climbs to the top of the slide.

"Look at me Hannah, I'm higher than you." I wave up at him, and smile at his face up against the sunlight. I wish he'd been born somewhere else. He would have loved it in the Capitol. But then he'd probably be a completely spoiled brat. I've never seen anyone from the Capitol who isn't. We soon have to go.

"Come on Toby." I call.

"Can't I have one last go on the slide?" He shouts back. He always does this.

"Okay, but ONLY one." I reply, going to the slide to catch him on the way down, so he doesn't run off like he usually does.

I'm nervous. I'm standing with all the girls in my class at school. They are all talking to hide their fear. No one talks to me though. I haven't really got any friends at school because I'm so serious at school. I want to make sure I can get a good job to help support Toby. I want to make sure he never has to take tesserae. Our escort walks onto the stage. I don't pay attention to the next bit, then he walks to the female reaping bowl.

"Please not me. Please not me." I whisper in my head. He picks a sheet out, and unfolds it slowly.

"Ha-" Please not Hannah Osbourne "Nnah" There are plenty of other Hannahs I'm sure "Os-" Okay, it's going to be me "Bourne." It sounded like he took a century to say my name, but it only took a couple of seconds. I can't cry. I have to be strong, for Toby. I know I can't win, but I have to try for Toby. I hope when my death comes, it comes quickly, for Toby.

It's only the bloodbath, but I'm dying. I shouldn't have run for the pack, but I thought I could run in and out, escape the fighting. The boy from seven saw me and chucked an axe in my back. My end is coming. The wound is so bad I can't feel it. That's good. I don't want Toby to see me in pain. I manage to splutter out

"I love you Toby, always. Be a good boy, I'll be watching over you now. From a better place." I don't know if it's true, but I want to comfort him, if he's watching. I love him so much. Toby is my last thought. Then death takes me.


	26. Chapter 26

**Sorry it's been a while, too much revision. Hopefully there'll be more regular updates in the easter holidays. Please tell me what you think of this chapter.**

 **Chapter 24**

"Do you miss Timble?" Toby asks Timble's parents.

"Shh, now Toby." His dad says as Timble's mum's eyes start watering.

"It's the things he did that annoyed me that I miss the most." She sobs "The way he would always leave different threads around the house." Her husband patted her arm gently.

"I know love." He comforts "He always tried to hide that he loved embroidering, but it was obvious he loved it. He'd always come back from work happy, he worked in the weaving section in his factory. He loved it, was always doing extra work after school and at week-ends. He hid it though, the lads at school teased him about it, told him it was a girly thing to do. He loved it though. I'd give anything to see him curled up on his chair sewing. Happy."

 **Timble's POV**

"Go outside," My dad nags at me once I've had my breakfast "Don't stay inside until the reaping."

"I've got something I need to finish for work." I lie, I actually want to finish sewing a pattern onto a jacket for a girl at school. I've almost finished, only another half hour and it'll be perfect. Dad looks dubious.

"How long will it take?" He questions.

"About an hour." I say, I'm going to resew the buttons back on, they're coming loose and the girl I'm doing it for is really pretty. Really pretty. Maybe I can charm her with my embroidery skills. It'd be the only way to get a girl into me.

"That factory forgets you're only 15. They work you too hard," Dad complains "Only an hour, then go outside with your mates until the reaping." I sigh, but it's the best deal I'm going to get. I think he knows I'm lying. The next hour is bliss. I finish the embroidery on the collar, small flowers and swirls, then go into my button pot and find some buttons that all match and go with the jacket. The buttons that are already on it are plain and dented. I think she'll appreciate it.

I'm soon done. It looks amazing now, I'll have to go out the house until the reaping now. But I grab the jacket and go to the front door.

"Bye." I call to my parents.

"Bye," Mum says "Good luck." We try not to make a big deal out of the reaping. It's unlikely I'll ever be reaped, unlike most families in 8, we can afford for me not to have to take tesserae.

"Thanks." I say, walking out the door and down our front path. I turn left out of the gate and then turn left again at the end of my path. I'm heading to Freya's house. I bang on her front door and an old lady answers.

"Yes?" She says loudly.

"Could I speak to Freya please?" I reply.

"Eh?" She shouts "Speak up."

"Please can I speak to Freya?" I repeat, louder this time.

"Oh, you want to speak to Freya, why didn't you say so?" She grumbles and lets me in "Freya, Freya come down here now."

"One minute." I hear her yell down the stairs.

"There's a rather handsome young chap asking to speak to you." She shouts up the stairs. In a couple of seconds Freya is standing at the bottom of the stairs, breathless.

"Oh, Timble, hey." She says "Do you want to come to my room?"

"You two aren't going up there alone." The old woman grumbles "Stay in the living room where I can keep my eye on you." Freya gives me a sympathetic grin, and shoes me through.

"Sorry about her, she's my grandma and she's convinced I've got a secret boyfriend." She laughed.

"It's okay," I smile, my heart beating faster, at her bright eyes "I've finished your jacket." I hand it to her "I changed the buttons too, I thought they looked a bit battered."

"It's awesome." She says, flinging her arms around me. I practically have a heart attack. Freya Tola, the hottest girl in 8, is hugging me. Timble Hygore, the boy who loves sewing. "How much do you want from it?" She goes over to a jar on the mantelpiece.

"Oh, I don't charge." I say "I do it for fun."

"I can't accept this, it must've taken you hours." She holds it out. I shake my head.

"Don't worry about it," I say "Seriously." She leans in and kisses me on the cheek. Wow. Who would've guessed a pale, skinny boy like me would get a hot chic kissing me.

"You're the best;" She smiles "Are you doing anything before the reaping?"

"Not really, my dad's kicked me out the house though; he thinks I spend too much time indoors." I shrug "Why, do you want to do something?" I ask. This is the closest I've ever going on a date with a girl.

"Sure, do you wanna go to the park and have a picnic or something?" She asks "If this is going to be our last day in 8, we might as well enjoy it." I smile.

"Okay, I have a bit of loose change I can buy a cookie for us if you want." She gives me a dazzling smile. She is so hot.

"I'll get some bread with butter and water. It's not much, but it's all we have. Sorry." She says getting up.

"It's fine, I'm only providing a cookie."

"Yeah, but I haven't had a cookie in years." She smiles. She leads me into the kitchen where she grabs three or four bits of flat lumpy bread that's traditional here in 8. Then she fills a battered bottle up, puts her jacket on and we wander along to the market together. I slide my hand into hers and she runs her little finger around and around my palm. I can't believe I'm just a small scrawny boy that enjoys embroidery. I normally try to hide my passion, but I overheard Freya talking about how much it costs to get a simple embroidering done.

"What one do you want then?" I ask her.

"I don't mind."

"Neither do I."

"Chocolate chip then." She smiles, as I dig in my pocket for seven dollars for the large chocolate chip cookie, then we wander down to the small scruffy park we have in 8. I sit down on the grass and she sits beside me. I break the cookie in half and hand her the bigger half. She takes a small nibble.

"Mmm." She licks her lips appreciatively. I take a small bite. It is warm and gooey. This is the nicest thing I've ever tasted.

"It's so good." I smile. She nods.

All too soon it's time for the reaping. She made me forget about it for a while, but we have to go now. What if I'm picked? I'll never survive. What if Freya's picked? I say goodbye. I could never volunteer. It'd be suicide. As we're walking I have one hand in my pocket, fiddling with the pieces of colourful thread in there. It comforts me, just a little. We're separated into different pens when we get there, and all too soon they're reading the names out.

" Hannah Osbourne." Thank goodness it's not Freya. The butterflies in my stomach stop fluttering for about a second, then I realise it's my turn. She walks up to the stage. Then they read the boys' name out. My thread's going to be in a huge knot because I'm fiddling with it so much. "Timble Hygore." No! Why me? I keep my hand in my pocket all the way up the stage. The thread's defiantly going to be in an impossible knot. Hannah and I shake hands.

"I'm so sorry." Dad rushes into the room crying. I smile weakly.

"It's okay." He hugs me.

"The odds are never in your favour," He weeps. "You didn't even take any tesserae."

"Someone has to be chosen." I try to comfort him. My mum comes in next. She's also crying. She blames herself. I try to comfort her too. She also bought some different coloured threads with her. For my district token. Then the peacekeeper's tell her she has to leave.

I keep hoping Freya turns up.

She doesn't. She isn't waiting at the train station for me either. I guess she was only nice to me because she liked my embroidering skills. I should've known a girl like her wouldn't be interested in me.


	27. Chapter 27

**Nearly half way through the victory tour. Yay. I didn't add the actual reaping for this one because I didn't think it was actually necessary because you knew the outline on what was going to happen. Sorry it's short; I'm getting writer's block at the moment. I won't stop writing. Please check out my other stories if you're into Harry Potter or Warrior Cats. Or try my other hunger games fic.**

 **Please drop a review to let me know what you think of this story, I don't mind if it's negative or positive, but don't flame.**

 **Disclaimer: I've realised I haven't been doing disclaimers, but in case it wasn't obvious I am not the wonderful Suzanne Collins, and I am not writing this story to gain any profit, it's just for fun.**

 **Chapter 25**

It's District 7 next. I killed one of their tributes, Ash. If I hadn't killed him, he would have probably had quite a good chance of winning. I have a feeling District 7 isn't too happy with me. I didn't kill the female tribute though.

The train journey goes on through the night. I can't sleep though, so I paint. I can't stop thinking about the tributes whose districts I've visited so far. I'm starting to realise why some victors aren't the same after coming out of the arena. I didn't think about the other tribute's lives, I was just concentrating on getting Carter out of the arena.

"Hello." I smile at the glaring families. They just glare at me some more. This is going to be awkward. We start eating in silence, they are still giving me the evil eyes. Especially Ash's family. They really must hate me. I can understand why though.

 **Ash's POV**

 **Six months earlier**

Pain sears through my foot. Then Sapphire stabs me.

I aim my axe at the tree and throw it. It hits exactly where I was aiming. I think I'm good enough. I think today will be the day. The day I volunteer. Volunteers aren't as rare in 7 as in other my outlying districts, but certainly not as common as in career districts. We have a volunteer every couple of years. Although we don't have a training academy, most of us have been using axes since the age of 7, so we're very skilled. This is my penultimate reaping. I think I'm skilled enough to win, if I join the careers. If I don't join the careers, I may be able to win if I pick them off one by one.

"Ash, come inside and have breakfast." Mum calls.

"I'm not hungry." I reply. I've heard that the food on the way to the Capitol is amazing, so I want to make sure I am really hungry. Plus, I won't get food at regular times in the arena so it's good to miss a few meals so I know I can still perform my best when I'm hungry. Mum sighs. She knows I'm thinking about volunteering, but I'm her only child so she doesn't want me to. She respects that it's my decision to make though. I love her like that. She advises me not to do stuff, but lets me make my mistakes for myself. It's the best way to learn.

My dad, however, disagrees. They're divorced, thinking about it; it was probably because of me that they got divorced to be honest. He nearly cut off one of my fingers when I was eight for missing the target I was throwing my axe at. He only ended cutting half of it off. Mum heard me screaming and came rushing in, so Dad hurried when aiming, and only got the top half of my pinkie finger. It hurt. There was a tonne of blood. Mum slapped him round the face and grabbed his arm and chucked him out the house. To be fair, she did chuck him a bit of money and his stuff. I'm pretty sure he wasted all the money drinking that night though. He would have needed it to keep warm. It can get seriously cold in 7, especially in winter.

I spend most of the morning throwing knives. Then I practise climbing trees. It'll be a useful skill to have, especially to spy on people. Well mainly the career alliance that always forms. Only if they don't let me in the alliance, I think they will though. I am a strong ally. I know a bit about edible plants. I also know a bit about medical stuff. You have to in 7. It's easy to get trapped under a falling tree or to cut yourself whilst chopping wood.

"Ash, come in now." Mum calls a while later "You need to get ready for the reaping." I drop my axe in our tiny garden and walk inside. Mum wrinkles her nose the second I walk in. "You stink, have a shower." I roll my eyes but do as she says. Half an hour later I am dressed in a shirt and trousers and my long black hair is tied back into a ponytail.

"See you later." I say to Mum.

"Are you going to volunteer?" She asks. I nod.

"I can win it," I say "I'm skilled, and then we can live in luxury."

"I don't care if we live on the streets, I just want you safe." She pulls me into her arms "It's your decision though. Just don't make one you'll regret later." I nod.

The wound is bad. I won't survive. I should have listened to my mum. At least I was safe in 7. I just wanted to make her proud. Then the pain stops.


	28. Chapter 28

**Phew, my main author's note will be at the bottom today because there's stuff about the character you'll understand more after you've read it. Singlewave, I waited for your D7F, but you never gave me the details, so I made this character up. I don't normally add a song I'd advise listening to when reading about certain characters (mainly because I don't listen to music much) but I'd really advise listening to 'Car Radio' by 21 Pilots. Sorry it's been ages since I updated I try to update a hunger games fanfic a day, alternating between this and 'The fourth quarter quell' but I was ill so I couldn't update that a couple of days ago, so I was behind schedule and then I went to a Dr Who Convention (any other Whovians out there?) yesterday which meant no update. I'll try to update at least every other day for the rest of Easter though.**

 **Chapter 27**

I guess I did kill their son, but to be fair, I didn't kill the girl. I never knew her name before the victory tour. I now know it's Irene, Irene Delaney. She was killed in the bloodbath. It wasn't a career that did it. If it had been I guess I could have kinda understood why they blame me. I suppose they just want someone to blame. I'd blame me too. I blame myself for Carter, well me and the Capitol. There should be a rule that family cannot be in the same hunger games unless one volunteers so that they can try to protect the other. Carter would still be here if they did that. I may not be though. I'll never know.

 **Irene's POV**

 **Six months earlier**

I know it's me that's going to be reaped. I don't know how, I just do. My name's only in four times. You know when a teacher is asking a question and no one puts their hand up, so they scan the classroom for someone to victimise, and you just know it's going to be you and then it is? That's what it's like. I hope I can be brave when the time comes. I don't want to turn into a monster in the arena, but I don't want Panem to see me as weak. If I kill, my family will probably disown me. They don't understand me. My sister bullies me, but acts like a good two shoes in front of my parents so I always get into trouble. She always annoys me and won't leave me alone until I completely lose it and start screaming at her. Of course I get told off for screaming, they never bother asking why I was screaming in the first place.

My dad's almost as bad as my sister, if not worse. He's recently got a better job so he works longer hours now. It means he apparently can't do any housework or anything, even at weekends when he doesn't go to work. He just sits and reads. He's always nagging at me to do schoolwork, but then when I am doing it, he's yelling at me to do some odd job or something, I mean I know he works long hours so I don't have to take any tesserae, but he could still occasionally cook a meal for my mum or something.

That leads me onto my mum. She's great, really, but, she doesn't really _get_ me. You know what I mean? Well, when she's not in a bad mood anyway. She gets het up about the tiniest things. Like my dad commented that he'd sort out the veg in a different way if he was doing dinner (I know it was a bit hypocritical but still), and she full on lost it. She just started yelling at him. I think she might have depression to be honest. I sometimes wake up in the night and hear her crying for hours. In the morning her eyes are red and puffy and she claims she couldn't sleep because of the wind. When she's in one of those moods, anything can set her off. I just try and avoid her to keep the peace.

Sometimes I think about what death would be like. I think if I wasn't so scared I'd see. I'm too scared though. Does that make me weak? It's a fear most people have, it's not actually the fear of dying. The human race in general just have a completely rational fear of the unknown. No one has ever come back from death. Not many people would care if I did die. I have friends yes, but not proper friends that I can turn to. Ones that have really been there for me. We just hang out because we have similar interests. I think that pretty sums up most of the friendship groups in my year. It wasn't always like that. I liked it when we were young and didn't worry about anything. Now, everything's changed, and I don't like it.

I hate most of my year. Most of them are just rude and arrogant and think they're so much better than everyone else. Especially some of the boys, they're complete jerks. There's this one boy called Xavier who always asks me to have sex with him. And first of all, I barely know him, and secondly ewww. Don't get me wrong, I'm not one of those silly immature people that still find the word 'sex' funny. I just don't find the idea appealing. Anyway that's not the only thing, he goes around and chats to practically everyone, and they all ignore him because no one actually likes him, and he acts like everyone in the whole year is his mate. He literally only has two friends. My year like to make fun of you for the smallest things. I miss a bit of hair when tying it back or my clothes are a bit crumpled I'm a tramp. Some districts might find this quite odd, I mean they can barely afford to survive.

In 7, we're kind of divided, I'm lucky to be in the rich section, people in my year take it for granted. They laugh if I poorer person walks by. I hate them.

I look up at the stage, the mayor has finally stopped speaking in his dreary old voice and the escort is picking the female tribute's name.

"Irene Delaney." I told you so. I just knew it. Gut instinct. I walk up, trying hard not to trip up on the stage as I go. It would be so typical of me to do that. I make it up safely though and she asks for volunteers. Unsurprisingly, there are none. A boy named Ash volunteers for a large fourteen year old. It doesn't look like they know each other. That doesn't surprise me that much. We do sometimes get careers here because we learn how to use axes from a young age, this gives us a huge advantage in that area of weaponry, it also makes us strong so we're good climbers and are pretty good at hand to hand combat.

"Please can I not have any visitors?" I say to the peacekeeper that's supposed to be guarding me. I don't want to spend what will probably be my last moments in 7 with people I don't really care about. He nods.

"Can I get you anything?" He asks gruffly, he's probably one they recruited from 2, they're generally more sensitive "I mean, I can't get you a weapon, but something for a token, water?" I hope he gets a pay rise, he seems a nice guy. I wish they were all like him.

"Could I have a pen and some paper, please?" I want to write down my thoughts. He nods, and calls a peacekeeper over while I am put in the room behind the doors he's standing in front of. A few minutes later he opens the door and hands them to me.

"Don't tell anyone though, I'm not really allowed." I smile weakly and nod. I mean, who's going to listen to me anyway, I'm just a tribute. I start writing. I don't really know what I'm writing, my thoughts, feelings. Anything and everything. When I read it through I realise it sounds like a suicide note.

The arena's a huge mountain and a forest. I'll stay to the mountain. There'll be less tributes. I'm going to go for the cornucopia first though. I mean what have I got to lose, really? And when you compare it to what I've got to gain, everything. It's worth the risk. It's worth risking my life, because I'm not really living, I'm existing. I'm surviving. I am. I could live though. Maybe, one day. I think it's worth a shot.

 **Okay, I lied at the start when I said I made her up. I based her on me a bit. I exaggerated her a little with the suicidal thoughts, but almost all me. I wanted you guys to get to know what I'm like on a personal level, some of the details I tweaked a little to make it work with the hunger games, but it's mainly all that. And yes, Xavier is an actual person, and yes he has asked me multiple times to have sex with me. All of which I have said no. I hate him. He's also randomly hugged me in the corridors at school, only the once thankfully, though he may never have tried again because he ended up with an elbow in the stomach. Hehehe.**

 **Anyway, I said at the start 'Car Radio' was a good song to listen to when reading it, I thought that Irene's 'Radio' was her innocence and growing up. Is that just me, if you listened to it, tell me what you thought her 'Radio' was? Wow this is deep. It was pretty emotionally draining writing this though.**

 **Once again hope you enjoyed and pretty please leave a review.**


	29. Chapter 29

**I've been writing like crazy so I could get an update out today, this one was scheduled for tomorrow, so you can repay me by dropping a review (hint hint). xD you don't have to but it would be greatly appreciated. I managed to get time to write half the chapter for my other fic that I updated earlier yesterday so I had time to write this now. I'll try update again tomorrow but no promises. I've just realised we're halfway through the victory tour. Wooo! I'm contemplating whether I should include the party at the President's mansion or not. What do you guys think? Anyway enjoy.**

 **Chapter 28**

They end up not speaking to me for the whole meal. You could cut the tension in the air with a knife. Soon we're heading to District 6, I killed both of their tributes. Ventador, the boy, I killed while still in his debt. I killed their female tribute too. She was defenceless, she wasn't really a threat, but I was just concentrating on getting Carter home.

"I am now always in your debt. He could have let me die, but he didn't." I say, looking at Ventador's family. They just glare back "I was just trying to get my brother home."

"Why did you volunteer, if you didn't even want to win?" His mum snarls at me.

"I didn't know my brother would be reaped, when his name was called, I knew I had to die. I couldn't live knowing I had let him die." I reply, I think this is the most honest thing I've said on the victory tour "I always dreamt of winning, now I have, I just wish it was Carter."

"Ventador would have killed you." His dad says "He was desperate to get home, I don't think he would have wanted to, but he would have."

"I didn't want to kill. Before the reaping, I was very much like the rest of careers, I'd have done anything to get home. But, the arena changes you. And it's scary how much so." I whisper, realising it's true. How true it all is. And how cruel the Capitol is.

 **Ventador's POV**

I stifle a yawn as I go downstairs, I was out late in The Lounge again. I wanted to make sure I was drugged up enough to make it through the day. I wasn't always this addicted, Pierce introduced me when I was about ten. I've never really been able to come off since. I think everyone needs their distraction for today though. It's just mine's illegal. The Capitol needs to sort out their priorities though. Apparently taking certain drugs which make you feel happy is punishable by whipping, or even death if your caught enough times, but throwing 24 innocent kids into an arena, forcing them to fight to the death and placing bets on who will win isn't.

"Did you go out with Pierce last night?" My dad asks, seeing me yawn. I nod. They know I take morphling, and as long as I don't get too high, they don't really mind. It's just a way to escape reality. I think they were a bit shocked the first time a came back really high, aged ten, I'd gone wild because it was my first time. I make sure I only have a sensible amount now.

Today's my first reaping, I'm a bit nervous, but my name's only in once. My parents work hard to make sure I don't have to take any tesserae. I help out a little with getting food on the table with my job. I've been working since the age of 6. I was a baggage handler. It was the only job I could get. Of course I've been promoted since then. I still work as a baggage handler, but in a different area so the stuff's heavier. The pays better too. I use half of it to get my hands on morphling, and the other half I give to my parents. I always try to cook dinner twice a week too. My parents could easily work a couple of hours less so I'd have to take tesserae, but they don't, so it's my little way of repayment.

"Hey Pierce." I smile, as he answers the door a little while later. He looks as tired as me.

"Hey," He grins, coming out "We really need to stop staying out so late."

"Yeah." I grin "Anyway, happy hunger games." It's Pierce's second reaping because his birthday's before reaping day and mines after it.

"And may the odds be ever in our favour." He finishes "And they will be." He grins confidently "I mean in total, our names are in three times. What are the odds?" He's right it's never going to be either of us. It must be what nearly 10000 to 1 it will be me. The odds are definitely in my favour. "I nearly got caught by a peacekeeper coming back last night."

"Seriously?" If he'd been caught he'd have been in serious trouble. Breaking curfew and possession and use of illegal substances.

"Yeah, one saw me coming round the corner, and chased me." He grinned easily though "Course I legged it down an alley and he chased me round all the backstreets so I lost him easily." Pierce knows every single backstreet in 6. It's good to know if you're going to be out late at night, in case you get into a sticky situation.

"Did he see your face?" I ask, this could still get bad.

"Nah, I had my hood up. All she'll have to go on is a small skinny boy who looked high." He laughs. That describes 90% of the teenage boys in 6.

"Not much to go on then." I laugh. When we get to the reaping we have to split up. We're divided into boys and girls and then split up based on our age. Pierce and I manage to re-join though. Once he'd in the section marked '13' and I'm in the sector marked '12' I head to the back of the roped section and he heads to the front so I'm standing just in front of him. I turn around and we stand and chat until the sectors get fuller and fuller.

Eventually the mayor starts and reads out the treaty of treason. It's so pointless, we get read it every day in assembly. Then the escort picks the girl name. Some 16 year old called Amber. She looks like she's one of the few people here not on morphling. Then it's the male tribute.

"Ventador Smith." Seriously? One slip. That's how many were in there. One, how did mine get picked? Pierce gives me a sympathetic look and I go up. She asks for volunteers. Please let there be one. There's only ever been one volunteer in my lifetime in 6. It was because the guy chosen was in a wheelchair and the games rules dictate that no help may be given to a tribute in the games that has a disability. Basically, unless he was sponsored he couldn't have a wheelchair. Someone volunteered out of pity to the boy. He made it into the final 8, before being killed by the career pack.

"Bad luck mate." Pierce says, coming in. I shrug.

"I guess the odds weren't in my favour." I reply.

"I'll get some of the lads from The Lounge to scrounge for some spare cash. We'll sponsor you what we can, it'll only be near the start though, prices go up." I shake my head.

"I haven't got a chance. Keep your cash, just remember me whenever you get high." I grin, I want to keep the mood light.

"You have got a chance, just keep out of everyone's way. Grab a pack and weapon from the cornucopia quickly at the start and find a good water supply. The career pack always breaks up halfway through anyway." He urges. We both know he's being optimistic. I'll be lucky if I live past the bloodbath.

I've done better than I ever expected. I'm in the final three. Maybe Pierce was right, maybe a can do this. I think it was a mistake saving the district 1 girl though, I don't think she'll repay the favour. Oh well. I couldn't just let her die like that. The Capitol always try to weaken somebody with mutts, I just hope she's not going to team up with her brother, otherwise I'm a dead man walking.

I'm starting to feel the effects of not having morphling for a couple of days. I managed to get some in the Capitol, but now I've had to go cold turkey, I have to go to the 'feast'. I need supplies. It's where the final battle will be. I can already see them both at the cornucopia.

"P-please spare me, I saved your life." I beg as she approaches me with a sword.

"I'm not winning, it was a waste of time." She replies "I'll make it quick though." I guess she's giving me that at least. Pain shoots across my chest as she brings her sword across it in a wide arc. I fall to the ground, panting in pain. I hope the pain stops soon.


	30. Chapter 30

**I'm having a bad case of writer's block at the moment, so it probably won't be great, I think I'm going to give hunger games fanfic writing a rest for a day or two, a short break usually helps sort it out, but I will be back don't worry. Just remember once you've read this chapter to hit the button labelled 'Review' and tell me what you think. Hehehe. Enjoy.**

 **Chapter 29**

"Amber wouldn't have killed." Her dad glares at me.

"If it was between her and someone else she didn't know. If she was tired and hungry, and missed her family. If all she wanted was for the games to end, she would have probably done anything." I reply, no one who's not been in the arena doesn't understand, however much you may not want to kill beforehand, is irrelevant. Once you're in the arena, all you want to do is escape alive, and the only way to do that is kill. Her younger brother looks at me.

"I believe you." He says. I don't know who this kid is, but he speaks more sense than the majority of Panem.

"Caleb sweetie, you're too young to understand." His mum says.

"I'm 8." He says proudly "That's old enough to understand. When I went to say goodbye, Amber promised there was nothing she wouldn't do to make it back. She told me she'd blow the whole planet up if it meant that we could have one more conversation." He argues.

"She was trying to be nice." His dad replies.

"I told you, even the idea of going into the games changes you." I say "She loved Caleb so much she would have done that, you should be proud that you bought her up to love him and look after him like that."

 **Amber's POV**

"Caleb, I've sorted your breakfast." I say. Mum and Dad worked late last night, so I've let them sleep in and now I have the task of sorting Caleb out. I do it all the time. He can be a bit annoying but he's very sweet sometimes. I once picked him up from school and someone pushed someone into me and he threatened to rip their project up. I mean the kid was traumatized and I made Caleb apologise, but it was hilarious.

"Why isn't mummy and daddy up?" He asks, coming into the kitchen, his blonde curly hair ruffled.

"They came in from work late yesterday, so they're having a lay in." I reply, handing him his plate "Now eat up." He takes the plate and starts munching slowly, pulling a face in disgust.

I can understand why. The bread in 6 is so boring. It's the same stuff every day, why can't it be like in 4 where it's full of seaweed and fish. It sounds delicious. Or the hearty, nutty bread from 11. District 6 is just boring. And we have to have it every day. Every single day. I guess we only have because it's cheaper. We don't have to take tesserae this way. I should be grateful really.

I'm just about to start getting dressed when there's a knock at the door, one of my friends Queenie, is standing there.

"Hey," I say "Do you want to come in?" She shakes her head.

"Who is it?" Caleb asks, also coming to the door.

"Just one of my friends, go and brush your teeth."

"What do you want?" I don't mean to sound rude, but I'm kind of tense about today. I don't know what my family will do without me. I'm always helping my parents out and looking after Caleb.

"I was just about to drop into The Lounge and wanted to know if you wanted to join me." She grins. I don't know why she bothers. The Lounge is basically where you go to get high in 6. 6 has a lot of morphling addicts. There's probably going to be more teenagers than usual there today, they want to be drugged up during the reaping, if they're picked it won't seem so bad then. I've never taken morphling in my life, despite Queenie's constant attempts to make me a druggie. I don't get why so many people are into it. I mean just because the world seems a nicer place when you're high, it doesn't mean it is.

The other thing I don't get is why the other districts have such a low number of morphling addicts compared to 6. I mean, I don't think, but you can tell just from watching through several years' worth of reapings. Almost all the teenagers there seem not to be pale and baggy eyed – the main effects on the body after taking morphling for long periods of times – and then you look at 6, and like 80 maybe 90% of us are like that. It's actually ridiculous.

"You know what I think about drugs." I say, and go to close the door.

"Wait," She says "We're not all taking drugs, there'll be booze too. And they're letting kids in today too, so you can bring Caleb."

"Of course, if everyone's getting drunk as well as high that makes it all better." I snap "And anyway, I don't want Caleb going near that place." I say "He's not turning into a druggie like you."

"What's a druggie?" It turns out Caleb was still listening.

"Someone who's addicted to drugs." I reply.

"But I heard drugs are good, they make you feel great about yourself." He looks at me wide eyed.

"Yes, but it only makes you feel great. Sometimes you need to be able to see the cold hard facts," I reply, please don't tell me someone at school's been trying to get Caleb into drugs "And they completely wreck your body."

"Urgh, why would anyone take that?" He wrinkles his nose in disgust, and I heave a sigh of relief. I think he's safe for now.

"Well, bye Queenie, see you at the reaping, yeah?"

"Yeah, I guess." She wanders off.

For the first time in living memory District 6 has a new escort, I discover later at the reaping. He doesn't seem any better than the last. He's acting like the hunger games are a good thing. Probably believes it too. I hate the Capitol so much. He walks to the female reaping bowl. My name's only in the minimum time, it shouldn't be me. I really hope it isn't me, but if it is, I'm not going to go without a fight. I'll try to make some strong allies, maybe with the careers if at all possible, I'm strong, I could make it. "Amber Blacksmith." I guess I will have to make it. Caleb might not be able to cope without me. He might turn to drugs. I want that less than anything. He needs those drugs like he needs a whole in his head.


	31. Chapter 31

**I'm back! Woo! A few days from writing cured my writers block, so I've been writing like crazy and as it's Easter I'm giving you guys a double update. I found this character really difficult to write and I wasn't sure on all the details when it comes to the transgender bit as I'm not transgender or close to anybody who is. Let me know what you think though and enjoy.**

 **Chapter 29**

District 5 next. I killed both their tributes in the bloodbath. The boy was kinda weird. He dressed like a girl and styled his hair like a girl. There was a rumour that he, or rather she, was transgender. Somehow I don't think his/her family would really like to tell me. (Can't be bothered to keep writing him/her so I'm gonna write they until it's obvious she knows which they are). They have two sisters that look like they're in their early to mid-twenties and a mum. I wonder what happened to their dad. My curiosity gets the better of me halfway through the meal. Plus it would be an insult to their memory to have killed them and never actually know.

"Excuse me, sorry but, there was rumour going around that your son, or daughter if the rumours are true, was transgender, I was wondering if they were." The mum gives me a watery smile.

"Yes, she wasn't afraid to tell people either." She smiles as if remembering her daughter "I found it hard at first, but that's who she really was. I'm just angry the Capitol made her go in as a boy. She wasn't." I nod. The thing most people hate about the Capitol other than the hunger games and that they control us, is transgender. They don't accept or recognise it was a thing. If someone there says they're transgender they undergo 'therapy', basically they get tortured until they admit they were wrong. In the districts they just ignore the whole issue but if you're transgender, you go into the reaping as the gender you were born as. They don't recognise who you really are.

 **Sammi's POV**

"Only one more to go after today." My sister smiles. "And you're not taking any tesserae." Nadia's always optimistic about everything. It can be kinda catching sometimes.

"Yeah," I say "What's for lunch?"

"Lunch?" Mum comes in "You're only just eating your breakfast." Nadia laughs as I take the last bite of my toast.

"I might go out, with my mates." I say "But if it's something I can't take with me I won't." Nadia laughs.

"Stop making it sound like you're not greedy." Kirsty, my other sister walks in, her hair in a huge tangle and she's rubbing her eyes tiredly.

"Who's greedy?" She yawns.

"Sammi."

"Am not." I retort.

"It's soup, but I can put it in the flask for you." Mum says, going to the hob to heat it through for me. I jump up.

"Thanks mum." I say and rush upstairs and have a shower. I hate staying in on reaping day. Nadia's always trying to cheer me up, I know she's just being nice, but it makes me feel even worse. Mum just fusses around me, and Kirsty never looks me in the eye properly, as if she can't bear to look at me for what could be the last time.

"Here you go." Mum says when I come back downstairs. She hands me the old battered flask and a roll of bread.

"Thanks, I'll see you later." I shove them in my bag, taking care to make sure the soup doesn't leak. Trust me, I've had personal experience, you don't want soup leaking in your bag. Especially not in a bag you have to use every day so it's hard to find time to wash it. Once I'm certain it won't leak I sling my backpack on and walk to Charlotte's house.

Charlotte's my best friend. She's always there for me. She's known me since before. That's how I think of it. Before, when I was a boy, and after, now, now I'm a girl. I suppose I was always a girl, but it wasn't until I was about 9 or 10 that I actually realised I was. Outside of my friends and family I'm not really accepted as a girl. I'm seen as a boy. If my name is reaped I have to go into the arena as a boy. I don't mind dying in the arena, well I do. But it wouldn't be so bad if I could go in as a girl. Transgender people have to go in as their 'assigned gender' basically I have to go in as the gender I was born as, not the gender I am. It's stupid.

Anyway, Charlotte's always been there. I'm not exactly sure when we became friends, we've just always been there for each other. When I started to realise I wasn't a boy, she was there for me and supported me. She threatened to punch anyone who bullied me, most people here don't accept transgender as a thing because the Capitol doesn't allow it. Charlotte helped me come to terms with it and helped me tell my family. My mum was shocked at first, but she was pretty good about it. She had always wanted a son, but she always supported my decisions. My sisters said they didn't care either way if I was a boy or girl, I'd still be as equally annoying to them. I think they were joking.

"Hey." Charlotte smiles as she opens the door. "Do you wanna come in while I put my shoes on?"

"Thanks." I say, and step into her warm house. Her grandma is sitting on the chair at the end of the hallway. Oh no. Someone help me please. She hates me.

"Back again Samuel." She puts emphasis on the uel. She thinks I'm evil because I'm trans.

"I keep telling you, it's Sammi." I answer.

"What was the name your parents assigned you at birth." She growls.

"Samuel." I mutter. I hate her so much.

"Leave it gran." Charlotte says.

"No!" She shouts. "This BOY needs to be shown not to be an attention seeking liar."

"We're going." Charlotte says, as her grandma stood up.

"Boy, come here." I know there's no point in trying to go. Charlotte will get it a lot worse later if I go. I walk over.

"I'm not a boy." I say. It's pointless to argue, but I don't care. She grabs her walking stick and smacks my back with it.

"Don't return until you will talk sense." My back stings from the heavy blow "Leave." She shouts. I walk as quickly as I can, my back on fire.

"Sorry." Charlotte says when we get outside.

"It's not your fault." I say "It's the Capitol's."

A while later, we walk to the reaping together. We have to split up once they've taken a prick of our blood. We arrange to meet up after the reaping though.

"Ladies first." Our escort says. Ladies are always first. I just hope it's not Charlotte. Her name's in quite a few times because she has to take tesserae. Please not Charlotte. Please not Charlotte. "Siara Jamming." She reads. My shoulders slump in relief, but then the butterflies come back when I realise it's the male's next. I shouldn't even be here. I'm female. "Now for the boys." She fumbles around for a slip. Not me. Not me. "Samuel Jacobs." Why? No I have to die a boy. I am not male. I am female. I shouldn't even be in that bowl.

I should never have run to the cornucopia. It was a bad idea, it was just too tempting. Siara and I are trapped now. We decided to ally, for a bit. Until it's the final eight, then we split. I don't think we'll make it though. There are careers everywhere. We're trapped behind a crate, if we try to come out they'll see us and kill us. Yes Siara has a dagger and I have a sword, but we're no match for the careers. The girl from one's spotted us. She's running towards us. Her sword slices my chest before I can block it. Blood starts to bubble out of my mouth.

"I don't want to die a boy." Darkness.


	32. Chapter 32

**Hope you like this chapter because my fingers are aching like crazy because I've been typing so fast to write 2 chapters. I found this a really interesting character to write, mainly because I found the more I wrote the more I was like Siara. I, like Siara, am bi, but I haven't told me family. I have no idea where my dad stands with homosexuality. My sister is homophobic, and my mum doesn't know where she stands with it. Anyways, I hope you enjoy and please tell me what you think.**

 **Chapter 30**

The girl's parents look like they regret something. I wonder if they said something they shouldn't just before the reaping. Lots of people do. They have a small, petty argument, then regret it because their child gets reaped and killed.

Siara's POV

My parents are ignorant. They really are. They don't support LGBT. I don't think they realise I'm bi though. I can't tell them. They'd probably disown me. I know the Capitol don't accept transgender people, but they allow homosexual people to get married. Some people, like my parents, think that homosexuality is a disease. All homosexuals should be wiped out. For that I hate them. Maybe when I'm older I may be able to tell them. Not at the moment though.

They're also incredibly irritating. It's hard being the middle child, especially when you have 8 other sibilngs. There's no money to spare. I wish my mum would get a job. It would really help. She doesn't though. My oldest sister, Kiara, has recently got a job; that helps a little. All of us in reaping age have to take tesserae. I seriously worry about whether my parents can do maths or not. I mean they say they have 9 kids because they can't afford contraception, pretty sure bringing up 9 kids costs more than contraception. Just sayin'. Do the maths. Seriously. As the middle child, it means I often get ignored. I'm too young to be part of the 'older' group amongst my siblings, but I'm too old to hang out with the 'younger' group. They've kind of formed 2 gangs: anyone younger than me and anyone older than me. I don't fit into either gangs. My parents don't pay that much attention to me either. Only when there's a chore to be done, then I'm the first person they look for.

"Siara can you come with me to bring Mrs Tike her shopping. Mrs Tike lives down the street, she can't go out her house, I say house, it's more of a tumbledown shack, but it's all she can afford. So my parents buy her shopping with the money her son gives her. Her son doesn't have time to look after her though, but my mum's dad was friends with her so my mum looks after her. It means she can't work though, so we're very poor. I have to take out tesserae for me, dad, mum and Mrs Tike.

"Yes." I take one of the baskets and go out the house, as we're walking, there's a couple in front of us, holding hands.

"That's disgusting." My mum hisses to me. "In public too." Did I mention that they are both male. "I've a good mind to tell them to clear off."

"Mum, we don't have time." I whisper, I really don't want to watch mum get into another fight about it. Almost every time she sees a homosexual couple, she has a go at them. She sighs.

"You're probably right pet, I just wish they wouldn't." She smiles weakly.

"Hello Mrs Tike." I say, as I go into her living room.

"What a pleasure to see you Siara, shouldn't you be getting ready for the reaping?" She asks.

"It's not until later." I say. "Do you want me to put this stuff in the cupboard for you?" I ask, indicating the shopping.

"That would be lovely dearie, thank you." She says. I go through to the dingy kitchen and unpack the grain, milk and bread we've got her. It's only simple, but with the money her son gives us, it's all we can get her. It's better than nothing though.

I'm standing amongst a group of hysterical girls my age. They get so worked up about the reaping and odds are it'll never be them anyway. The escort, as usual is irritating. She looks so happy that the hunger games are beginning once again. It's sick. I try not to think too hard about what will happen if I am reaped. I know the answer straight away. I'm going to die. That's not the worst thing. I'm not scared of dying. It's not that I'm afraid of. I'm afraid I'll be forgotten. I don't really have any friends and my family ignore me. I don't want to be forgotten. I don't want to just be another tribute that died. I don't want it to be like I never existed. But that's the thing about the games, people just forget about you once you're dead.

"Siara Jamming." The escort reads out. I guess my worst nightmare is coming true. I guess I'll just have to do something to make people remember me in the games. Maybe I'll just jump off the podium before the countdown. I think people would still forget me though. I'd just be another suicde. There's one every few years.

"Honey, I'm so sorry." Mum whispers rushing in to say goodbye.

"Mum, I have to tell you something." I've decided to come clean about being bisexual. I want them to know who I really am, so my memory will stay true.

"What, what is it?" She asks.

"I'm bisexual." I say. She looks furious.

"You're no daughter of mine." She storms out. I guess she told the rest of the family not to say goodbye because of it. I figured they really were monsters then, they couldn't put their morals aside, just once, just once to say goodbye to their daughter. They couldn't say goodbye to me because I'm bi.


	33. Chapter 33

**I added Coral's individual training because I realised this chapter was quite short and I couldn't have her death scene from her POV because she was asleep. There is a quite a bit of gore in this chapter so I'm just warning you, but please tell me what you think and enjoy.**

 **Chapter 31**

The end of the victory tour is quite near: only three more districts and then the Capitol. I have to get through the career districts though. I killed all of them. It wasn't even like they attacked me or anything. I must have looked like a monster, killing them in their sleep. I thought it would mean Carter would go home. I wonder if he would have if I didn't kill them. I guess I'll never know.

"You're a good fighter." Coral's older sister says. None of Coral's other family members turned up. Or she didn't have any others. I don't know which.

"Thanks," I say. Not many people have actually congratulated me yet. To be fair I did kill a lot of their children though.

"I nearly volunteered about 5 years back." She says. "But my best friend beat me to it. I was supposed to, but she was jealous. She was the one who got ripped apart by the huge scorpion mutts." She says. I remember her. I thought she was going to win. The Capitol set 5 huge scorpion mutts on her when she was asleep though, the career alliance had broken up by this point so she didn't realise they were there until one of them had already injected her with venom so she was paralysed. They ripped her apart slowly after that.

"I'm sorry." I say.

"It's fine, she shouldn't have volunteered." She shrugs.

 **Coral's POV**

It's finally reaping day. The day I've been waiting for my whole life. The day I can volunteer. I can't wait. I've trained for it my whole life and now I can't wait to just get into the arena and to start killing. I want to watch the life drain from my victims' eyes. I want to hear their agonising screams. I want them to feel pain. I love seeing people in pain. It's quite interesting to analyse their thought process while they're in pain. The begging, how long it takes before they cry out. I find physical pain is much more interesting to watch than emotional pain. Emotional pain someone only cries and begs for them to take their loved ones place. I've seen it at whippings.

A few weeks ago a small boy, only about 7 or 8, was whipped for stealing an orange. He got 12 of the best, and his mother was standing their watching. She was crying her eyes out and begging them to whip her instead. It was all quite boring really. The boy however, was more interesting. He tried to wriggle away. He screamed in agony. I loved the way the blood wriggled down his bare, bony back. It was fascinating. Some people think I'm sick, but I just find it fun. Some people like to read, some like to swim, me? I like to torture. By the age of 5 I had killed 10 birds, through cutting their wings off and then pinning them to the ground, as its energy drained from it. It was fun.

"Coral, are going training before the reaping?" My older sister, Cara, says.

"Yeah." I say, I want to make sure I'm in peak condition for the games.

"Okay, I'll see you when I say goodbye." I think she's slightly jealous. When she was 18, she was supposed to volunteer, but her best friend volunteered instead. She was furious and told her so when she said goodbye. We both celebrated together when she was ripped limb from limb by the mutts. She was never much of a friend in the end. It's considered a huge insult to volunteer here in 4 if you aren't the person selected by the academy. No one in 4 will sponsor you. We sponsored the boy from 4 that year, he made it to the final 2, but the boy from 1 took him by surprise and stabbed him in the heart before he could defend himself.

I wonder what my parents would think if they knew I was going to volunteer. They died in a rebel attack when I was 8, Cara took care of me from then. She took tesserae for the both of us and got a job. When I was old enough I also got one. We didn't really care about taking tesserae, if we were picked, someone would have volunteered anyway. Tesserae is an amazing thing in 4. We have volunteers every year, so it doesn't matter how many times your name goes in, if it's picked it's highly unlikely you will be going to the games. It's basically free food here.

I jog off to the academy and pick up a whip. I haven't quite mastered it, and I need to be deadly in as many weapons as possible.

"Ready for your big day?" Lila, my soon to be mentor asks.

"Of course." I say.

"Not that you'll be coming back alive." I spin around and flick the whip at Jay who is standing in front of me. He barely dodges out of the way in time.

"Getting a bit slow aren't we?" I taunt "And is that a threat?"

"No," He gives me a withering look "It's a promise."

"Why do people always say that." I smirk "It just sounds dumb. Oh and Jay, you do know promises are meant to be broken." He smirks, but grabs two swords, and chucks one to me, I fling the whip away. Clash. I block his attack at my chest. We weave around all the dummies and weapons, blocking and attacking. It's like a dance. Only we don't know what the next move will be.

"Stop." Lila says "You know the no fighting policy." Why did she have to stop us here? It was just getting fun.

"Sorry." Jay says.

"That doesn't get you out of punishment." Lila's punishments are seriously harsh "You will work on your core muscles for the remaining half an hour until you have to go to the reaping. Do you understand?"

"Yes Lila." We say.

"Well start with sit ups." She says, clearly irritated. Punishments here are harsh, but it meant we learnt. It was going to be a long half hour.

"Ladies first." The escort walks to the girls' side of the stage.

"I volunteer." I yell, already walking towards the stage. I can't wait until I can get into the arena and start killing people. It's going to be fun, I can finally kill people instead of animals.

 **Individual training**

"You have 15 minutes to present your chosen skill." The head game maker says. I head over to the poisonous berries table and crush two of them up together. The juices from these mixed makes whoever's injected with it temporarily paralysed. Then I grab a sword, dip it in the juice, and pick up several knives. I start to spar with one of the avoxes. Maybe I won't have to go to the arena to kill someone. In seconds they are disarmed, and clutching their wrist, to disarm them I decided to chop their hand off. They are gargling in pain as blood gushes from the stump. I think it's quite beautiful. Red's my favourite colours. I love the deep red of blood, especially when it's causing someone pain. One of the game makers looks like he is about to protest about going on, but another catches his eye and he closes his mouth. The juice soon does it's work and he collapses on the floor, unmoving. He can still feel though. I take out the first knife. Its blade is curved and sharp, I drag it in a long curving line across his face.

"See the trick is to make sure they're in pain without making them scream too much, you don't want others to be alerted of your whereabouts." I say, smiling up at the game makers "And if you kill them too quickly there's no fun in it." I take out the second knife. The edge is serrated and carve his face again. I do this three more times with different knives. I know I don't have long left. I grab a rope and hang him from the ceiling. The juice's effects are starting to wear off. He struggles a little, but is weak from blood loss. Once he's hanging he won't have long to live, so I rip his shirt off and demonstrate my whip skills.

"Your time is up, thank you." I spin the avox's corpse around so they can see its face properly. I see their shocked expressions, flick one last knife through its blood soaked back and leave. Leave them speechless as they gape at the cuts on his face. The cuts that spell out 'Coral'. They won't forget me in a hurry.


	34. Chapter 34

**Sorry it's a bit short, updates will be less regular, I'll try to get a chapter at least once a week but no promises now school's started back. I hope you enjoy, and please hit the review button when you've finished, they make me so happy.**

 **Chapter 32**

"Don't you even care that she killed your sister?" The boy's dad looks disgusted.

"People die in the games. Yes, I miss Coral, but we both knew the risks of the games.

"They were backstabbed."

"Don't pretend Jay wouldn't have done exactly the same if he had to." I say, I know I'm a monster, I realise that now, but their son also killed people. They're okay with that but not with me and killing their son.

"If it was the only way to survive." He scowls at me.

"I was trying to make sure any threats were eliminated, so my brother had the best possible chances of winning. That included the other careers."

 **Jay's POV**

I toss over again. I've been drifting in and out of sleep all night long. I know I should want to do this, but some small part of me. Some tiny part of my subconscious is screaming at me not to. I know I can win it; I've had more than enough training. I'm just a bit nervous that's all. When the weak sunlight starts to stream through my blinds, I get up. I have to do this. I have to make my dad proud. And honour my mum's memory. She was pregnant with me, not knowing, she volunteered for the games, but her games were one of the longest in history. It had been a small bloodbath with only four dead. However much the game makers tried to speed things up, it wasn't going any faster. By this point my mum had obviously realised she was pregnant and had broken up with the rest of the careers because they said she would grow too weak to stay with them. By the end she was 6 months pregnant and there was only the male tribute from 1 left. He didn't notice she had snuck up behind him and she stabbed him in the back. She only just got back home to 4, before she went into labour, but because she still hadn't recovered from the games and died in labour. Meaning my dad had to bring me up alone and because my mum was dead, we didn't even get to live in the victors' village.

I get up and put my training gear and go out for a run. Should I volunteer? Should I not? I don't know. I just don't know. I know I might die. I could win though. I could bring honour. I could have my own house and all the money I could want. I could be rich and famous. I don't know if it's worth the risk though.

Coral, the female volunteer for this year, is already at the academy when I get there. She's practising with a whip. I don't know why, I mean we'll have all the weapons at the cornucopia.

"Ready for your big day?" Lila, the victor who will be mentoring Coral, asks her.

"Of course." She says, she sounds so smug, let's have some fun. I have decided. I will volunteer, and I will win.

"Not that you'll be coming back alive." She spins around and flicks the whip at me. She's quick and I barely dodge out of the way in time.

"Getting a bit slow aren't we?" She laughs at me. "And is that a threat?"

"No," I glare at her. She is so full of herself. "It's a promise."

"Why do people always say that." She smirks "It just sounds dumb. Oh and Jay, you do know promises are meant to be broken." I smirk, but grab two swords from the sword stand next to me, and throw one to her; she chucks the whip away and catches the sword. I go for a wide sweep across her chest. She blocks me. We weave around all the dummies and weapons, blocking and attacking. It's like a dance. Only we don't know what the next move will be. It's quite beautiful really. I mean if we weren't trying to kill each other.

"Stop." Lila says "You know the no fighting policy." Why did she have to stop us now? It's just training.

"Sorry." I apologise, Lila's punishments are harsh, and if I say sorry it might be slightly less harsh.

"That doesn't get you out of punishment." Oh well, it was worth a try "You will work on your core muscles for the remaining half an hour until you have to go to the reaping. Do you understand?"

"Yes Lila." We say simultaneously. This is going to be a long half hour.

"Well start with sit ups." She snaps angrily. Great. I'm pretty sure she knows I hate doing sit ups.

She finally lets us go with only a little bit of time to spare to get to the reaping.

"You still volunteering?" Scarlett my best mate asks me.

"Of course." I say, I don't want him to know I was having second thoughts.

"Damn." He grins "I was hoping I'd get to volunteer."

"You'd have to fight me to get onto the stage." I said, as the escort started.

"Ladies first."

"I volunteer." Coral rushes up to the stage, she looks so happy you would have thought she had already won the games.

"What's your name?" The over enthusiastic escort asks.

"Coral." She's glaring straight at me.

"Now for the ma-." I don't even let her finish.

"I volunteer." I'm going to make my mum proud.


	35. Chapter 35

**Sorry I've not updated for ages. I've had school work and I'm writing another fic, so I write a chapter of this one day and a chapter of that the next, but the chapters for that one are having to be quite long so it's taking me a couple of days to write a chapter for it, meaning this one is longer updating because I'm not writing any of it. Anyways, it's one of my longer ones, this one I've included part of their interview because I felt it was necessary for the way I was going to have them die. I wasn't originally planning on them dying like that I was going to have Ash kill them, but it fitted too well for me to resist. Anyway, FrostedDusk, I hope I've done her justice. And all of you enjoy.**

 **Chapter 33**

Only two more districts, and then the Capitol and I'll be off this stupid tour. I'll be out of the limelight for another 6 months, until next year's games, when I'll be mentoring. It'll probably be a volunteer. I don't know how I'm supposed to help them. What advice am I supposed to give? Murder as many as possible. I just wish I could turn back time, so that I didn't win. So it would be Carter here.

The female tribute from District 2 must have a twin. They look nothing alike. They're about the same age though. I wonder why she volunteered. I was surprised when I heard that. District 3 rarely has volunteers.

"What's your name?" I ask, sitting next to her.

"Bug." Ah. Things fall into place now. In her interview, Lannie the district 3 female tribute, said that the girl she volunteered for was her crush. She'd been crushing on her for almost a year, and when Bug's name was called, she knew she had to volunteer. She couldn't watch her die on television. Lannie ended up being killed by some mutts. Bug mutts. It was sick when I watched it back. She volunteered for Bug, and they used a play on words and sent mutts as giant bugs to kill her. They succeeded. It looked painful.

 **Lanni's POV**

I get up and go out the house before anyone else is even awake. Maybe it is selfish of me, especially on reaping day, but there's always the chance I could be picked. If it is going to be me, I want to spend my last hours in District 3 with Bug. I love her so much, but she doesn't see me. Well, she does, just not in that way. She sees me as a friend, someone to chat to at work, hang out with at school, someone to see when she's bored. I just wish it was different. I've never told her how I feel, I've never even told her I'm lesbian. I don't know how she'll react. I'd rather just be friends with her than tell her how I feel and risk our friendship.

"Bug, Lanni's here." Ishi, Bug's brother call, opening the front door as he sees me down the road. Bug comes out and smiles at me. She's gorgeous. Her long light brown hair is tied back in a high ponytail and she is wearing a short tight skirt that stops a few centimetres above her knees.

"Hey." She grins. Her teeth are perfectly straight and dazzlingly white.

"Hi, where do you want to go?" I ask her.

"I have to stay in and get Ishi ready for the reaping, it's his first time.

"Do you want me to help?" I will not be deterred.

"If you want," She says "But I don't see the appeal in helping comb my younger brother's hair in place."

"I was just gonna laugh while watching you attempt to." I grin. Ishi hates dressing up smartly for any occasion, so it'll be difficult for Bug to get him dressed nicely for the reaping.

"Ha ha." Bug says, turning around and heading back in, I follow "Such a good friend you are." She adds sarcastically.

"I know." I grin, tossing my hair back. I always try these casual flirting techniques that Bug taught me a couple of years back, before I started liking her, but she hasn't picked up the hint yet. Maybe she never will.

"How many times is your name in?" Bug asks.

"7, I took tesserae for me, mum and dad. What about you?" I ask. I don't know why I lied. I've never had to take tesserae. My parents work long hours 6 days a week to make sure I don't, and I work at weekends to help out.

"9, for me, mum, dad, Ishi, and Saul." I think I was lying to make Bug feel better.

"Why can't I take tesserae?" Ishi moans.

"You want to take tesserae?" Bug frowns.

"No, but it's not fair if you take it all."

"It's because I've got a higher chance of winning if I'm reaped, because I'm older and stronger." Bug says. I hadn't thought of that. What if Bug does get reaped? No. The odds are tiny it won't be her.

"Now for the females." Bug squeezes my hand reassuringly. I hope it's not wither of us.

"Good luck." I whisper to her. She nods as if to say 'You too'.

"Bug Carlin." I am glued to the spot. I'm vaguely aware of Bug's warm hand being ripped from mine and she starts to go up. No! I can't let this happen. She can't die. I won't let her.

"No!" I shout "Bug no." People are looking at me sympathetically. Bug turns her head. "I volunteer." I push myself towards Bug. I have to save her.

"It's okay." She says.

"It's not." As I pass her, I give her a small hug as I go up, tears streaming down my face.

"You shouldn't have volunteered for me." Bug's my first visitor.

"I had no choice." I say, smiling weakly. I couldn't watch you be, be, be…" I don't finish the sentence.

"What if I can't watch you though?" She says. I shake my head.

"Listen Bug, just listen. There's something I should have told you ages ago." She opens her mouth to speak "We don't have much time. Just listen." I take a breath. "I'malesbainandI'vehadacrushonyoufornearlyayearnow."

"What?" She says. I take another breath.

"I'm a lesbian." I begin.

"I-I." She's speechless. I have to tell her. I can't die without her not knowing.

"And I like you. Bug, I really like you. And I have for a while." I watch her through my wet lashes, she's staring at me.

"There's something I need to tell you too." Why isn't she acting the way I thought she would? "I am too. And I like you. And, every time I look at you, all I can think about are your lips."

"Tell me what you think now." I whisper, and lean in. It's like fireworks are exploding around us. It's magical. My last magical moment with her before, she puts something in my hand. She stops, pulling her soft lips away.

"Perfect. I love you." A peacekeeper bursts in and starts pulling her out. "I want some more of that. Come back." She says. She is shoved out.

"I will." I say, but the doors are already closed. I look at what she put into my hand. A photo. Of us. I really hope I survive.

"So, why did you volunteer, for that girl, Bug?" Caeser Flickerman asks at my interview.

"Bug, was my best friend." I say. My mentor, Wiress, said to be honest, so I will. "I wanted it to be more though. I loved her. When we said goodbye, she told me she felt the same way."

"Aww." Caeser says "So say, you win and you get Bug as your girlfriend, is that all you want?"

"No." I say "I volunteered because all I wanted was Bug to be safe."

I've made it through day 1 of the arena. I didn't even think I'd make it this far. I take out my district token. The photo Bug gave me. I haven't seen her in about a week. A week since that magical kiss. The Capitol anthem starts to play, and I look up at the fallen. My district partner is the first to appear, I guess he didn't have much hope. I hope it was quick though. He was nice. Then both from 5, the 7 girl, both from 8,9,10, 11 and 12. No careers dead then. It's one of the biggest bloodbaths. Over half the tributes are dead, and it's only day 1. I hope my face won't be up there tomorrow. I settle down to sleep.

A twig snapping wakes me up, it's about mid-morning, I've been asleep for hours. I turn around. That's when I see them. I barely hold in a scream of terror. I grab my pack and knife and run. I can hear them, the mutts behind me. They're like ants, giant, flying ants. They're bugs. I hate the Capitol so much. Bugs are going to kill me. A stabbing sensation runs through my shoulder, I think it has a paralysing agent in its pincers because I can no longer move. I just hope Bug isn't watching I don't want her to see this. I love her. I hope she remembers that.

 **Hint, hint, this is the part where you hit review. I hope you liked.**


	36. Chapter 36

**It's been a few days, sorry. My mum told me I couldn't use internet because she'd received an email saying we only had 1/3 of it left, but she had told me we'd 'almost run out'. I didn't actually know we still had a 1/3 left until yesterday, so I figured with 1/3 of our monthly internet in less than a week, I could at least go on social media and update fics. As usual I hope you enjoy, and please tell me what you think, you're reviews are so encouraging and are what keep me writing. Also I've decided to write like crazy for the next couple of days, so if I get 5 reviews on this chapter, there will be a double update either tomorrow or the next day, depending on how much homework I get tomorrow, so please it's really in your best interest to hit the review button.**

 **Chapter 34**

Bug's eyes fill with tears. I turn to the male tribute's family. They also seem upset, though slightly less so than Bug.

"Thank you for making it painless." His mum says. "I knew when his name was reaped the odds were, he wasn't coming back. I could only just deal with that. I wouldn't have been able to cope if you had done it slowly." I shrug.

"If I was going to die in the arena, I would want it to be quick. I think it's sick to drag it out so it's longer." I say.

"Well thank you." His dad gives me a weak watery smile.

 **Flux's POV**

I can't wait for today to be over. Once it's over, I'm safe. Once it's over, I can no longer be reaped. I mean, even today the chance of me being reaped is pretty low. Both my parents and I work, so we have just enough food so I don't take tesserae. My name's only in 7 times, some 12 year olds have it in more times than that. I'm lucky, I know that. I feel sorry those who are reaped, but I hate it when they get emotional. At the end of the day, you're going to go into that arena so you might as well try to look as strong as possible to get sponsors. They're not just going to let you escape the games if you cry loads. You'll just look weak and be first on the career's hit list.

The odds are that I won't be reaped, but if I was I know what my strategy would be. Find a couple of good strong allies, no careers though, and grab essentials from the cornucopia and run. I wouldn't hunt any tributes, but if any strayed past me, of course I wouldn't let the opportunity go. If there weren't any tributes I wanted to ally with I'd just go on my own. I'd rather go on my own, and just depend on myself, than ally with someone I don't really know or trust and have them backstab me. I'm not really a people person anyway. I prefer my own company.

"Do you want me to cut you some bread?" I ask my parents as I pass their room on the way downstairs.

"That'd be lovely, thank you." Mum calls through the door. I go downstairs slowly, I've got ages until the reaping, there's no point in rushing to get ready. I get the half stale loaf of bread out and start slicing it. Then I get the butter out and spread it thinly onto the bread. I pick two of the three plates up and go upstairs.

"Here." I say, knocking on their door, while balancing the plates. I give one to each of them and go out. Just as I'm closing the door, Dad calls out.

"Flux?" I pop my head back around the door.

"Yeah?"

"Good luck, for later." I nod.

"Thanks." I head back down and nibble on my bread, curled up on the old cracked sofa in the living room. I shiver and pull the old threadbare blanket around me. It's a cold day, despite the sunlight streaming through the curtains. The mornings are getting brighter and warmer earlier, but I think today is just going to be a cold day.

I hate the cold. The way it seeps into your bones. The way your fingers get a whitish blue and you can't feel them, even when you bury them deep into your warm pocket, where the cold can't penetrate them. I hate the way goosebumps form and the way you sit there shivering. I can deal with heat much better than with the cold. If I was going into the arena, I'd hate it to be tundra. That'd be my worst nightmare.

I brush off the crumbs from the bread and butter and stand up, hopping around from the cold slate flooring. It's like ice on my bare feet. I decide to have a hot shower to warm myself up. I'm allowed one hot shower a week, all the other time I have to have a lukewarm one.

I turn the nozzle in the shower and step under, forgetting it takes a few seconds to warm up.

"Argh!" I scream, as cold water drizzles down my back. I leap out and skid on the wet floor. I end up getting even colder than before because by this point the water's gone all over the floor. Typical I try to warm myself up, but just end up even colder. I soon warm up under the hot shower though. Steam starts to whirl across the bathroom, and soon I can barely see through it. I know I'll have to get out soon, but the hot streams of water is so nice. As soon as I get out, I immediately feel cooler, and have to grab a worn thick towel to dry myself.

After I'm dressed, I just stay inside and do some homework until the reaping. Most people spend time with their friends and family before the reaping, but my family know there's nothing we can do about it and I don't really talk to people much. I'm a bit of an outsider.

After I've signed in at the reaping, I stand amongst a load of boys my age We're all shifting anxiously. Lots of them will be in a the reaping a lot of times because they've had to take tesserae. After what seems like an age, they finally start.

"Now for the females." I don't have anyone to root for in that bowl. I just hope it's someone with half a chance.

"Bug Carlin." I don't know who she is. She starts to walk up, but someone starts shouting.

"No!" A girl from near where she came out yelled "Bug no." Everyone has turned to look in her direction, even Bug turns her head and stops. "I volunteer." She pushes her way to Bug, they both look the same age. They must be really close friends for her to actually volunteer for her.

"It's okay." Bug says, almost inaudibly from where I'm standing.

"It's not." The other girl says quietly, and as she passes Bug, she stops and hugs her.

"And what's your name?" The escort asks.

"Lanni." She says dully. I don't think she's got much chance in the games. She's not that young, she just doesn't look like she's got it in her to kill.

"Now for the male." She walks to the other reaping bowl. It shouldn't be me. The odds say it won't be. Reason says it shouldn't be. "Flux Rymortos." She says. I guess fate doesn't want to listen to reason. I go up. I just hope I can survive. I'm strong. I could kill. If it came down to it. I'm sure of it.

I grab a pack and a sword and run. I head straight for the river. I want to swim across it while everyone at the cornucopia is still distracted. I attach the sword to my belt, and my pack is slung loosely over one shoulder. The water is freezing. It's getting through my layers of clothing, making it bulge and harder to swim. When I am almost half way across, I feel a sharp pain in my back. It drains all my strength. I go under. I try to scream. Muddy water fills my mouth. The water starts to turn a murky red. I can't see in front of me. I'm trapped. My back feels like it's on fire. I think it's a throwing knife. I just know I'm not going to survive. I'm drowning. Why did I have to go this way? In a cold river. I hate the cold. Especially cold water. Blood covers my vision. My oxygen runs out.


	37. Chapter 37

**No double update guys, I will hold the same offer on this chapter though.**

 **I believe in nargles too: to answer your question, the person who submitted Flux, didn't say he was autistic, but there wasn't much detail on his personality other than that he was quiet, so I had to use my imagination. I think in my mind though, I had him as one of those people that seem a little bit autistic, but haven't really been diagnosed. I'll let you decide whether you think he's autistic or not because I just guess it depends on the way you picture it. But thanks for leaving a review.**

 **Hope you guys enjoy the chapter, and remember if you want a double update either tomorrow or on Saturday (again depending on how much homework I get tomorrow will determine which day it will be on) leave a review, if I get 5, there will be a double update sometime in the next couple of days.**

 **Chapter 35**

Only District 2 left now. Then the Capitol, then I can just settle back down in 1. Well, until the next hunger games. I can't wait until it's over, just a couple of days left. Hopefully I won't be that bad, District 4 wasn't, and I backstabbed both of their tributes.

Both of the families look like they've recovered well, we sit in silence, not an awkward silence. I comfortable one.

"It was clever." Alex's dad says. "Using his crush against him." He clearly understands that careers use weaknesses against people. Alex's crush on me was an obvious weakness. I never gave anyone a chance to use my weakness against me. Everyone knew what it was: Carter. In the end it was Carter who used it against me, but lovingly. He knew only one of us could come out, I wanted it to be him, he wanted it to be me. At home when we had arguments, I normally won, this one, I guess he was more stubborn. I should have protected him though. I should have tried.

 **Alex's POV**

"It's your big day." Dad grins, waking me up. "How are you feeling?" He pulls my blinds up, letting the warm sunlight stream into my bedroom.

"Great." I grin, getting up. It's the day I've been waiting for. Reaping day. It's my last, but this year is special, this year I am the one volunteering. I've always looked up to the volunteers from 2. They're so strong and powerful. They never go down without a fight. When I was 5, for my birthday present my dad sponsored the female tribute a knife because she ended up losing all her weapons when half the arena flooded. The knife ended up saving her life and it made her win. She was so grateful to us she still gives us some of the money she gets from winning. It makes us one of the richest families in 2. We were pretty rich before, but now we live in luxury. Well, not compared to the Capitol, but by district standards, we're incredibly rich.

Lots of people think careers volunteer for the money. I'm not. I want the fame, the glory. I can't wait to get into the arena.

"Go and have a shower while I sort your breakfast for you." Dad says, and I head to the bathroom. Soon I am in the kitchen drinking a fruit drink thingy. It's quite expensive, but it's really healthy and is high in energy, which'll help when I'm training later.

"See you later then." Dad says once I've drunk it all. It was my favourite flavour today: mango and passion fruit. It's really unusual and is way nicer than any of the other food we get in 2. We have pretty much all the food the other districts have, we just also get a few extra stuff like that because of the training centre, and 2 gets the most privileges because they get most of the peacekeepers from 2. It's not a bad option being a peacekeeper really. The only thing is, you're not allowed to marry or have kids. That's what puts most people off.

"Yeah," I grin "After the reaping, in the justice building." I've never been to the justice building before, but it's where the tributes say goodbye to their family and friends. I walk along the path to the training academy. It's not far from where I live, so I get there 5 minutes later. Autumn's just got there too, I can see her going through the doors. She's going to be the female tribute.

"Hey." I say, catching up with her.

"Oh, hi." She turns around to face me. "You ready for today?"

"I was born ready." I grin "You?" She

"Of course." I walk with her to her locker, she dumps her bag in it, before taking a hairband off her wrist and tying up her long, red waves. It goes down to about her waist, and I'm surprised she hasn't cut it yet. It gets in the way a bit when she's training.

"What are you going to do today?" I ask her.

"I just want to do some running, get my physical health up, you know?" She smiles, going to the treadmills.

"I think I'll join you." I say, and step on the nearest one. We both start setting it up to the right pace for us and start jogging. Her hair starts to thump on her back, and it starts to fall down. She pushes it out of her eyes. "You should probably get it cut." I say.

"I know, my parents can't afford it though." She says cautiously, almost as if she's scared I'll make fun of her.

"Come with me." I say. I haven't seen my mum in years, but Autumn, well she's one of my closest friends. I know it's silly considering we're both going to volunteer this year, but we've agreed that there's going to be no hard feelings against each other in the games, and we're not going to have any regrets if we have to go against each other.

"Where to?" She asks. My mum left my dad when I was 3, and I've never really forgiven her. I do see her occasionally though. I do know she's the owner of one of the biggest hairdressers in 2.

"My mum's place. She'll give you one for free."

"But you hate her." She says.

"Exactly, she'd do anything for me to forgive her." I say "So a free haircut for my mate is nothing."

"Are you sure?" She asks, stopping the treadmill.

"I wouldn't have suggested it otherwise." I say.

"As long as you don't get into a screaming argument with her while she's halfway through cutting it" Autumn laughed "I don't want her to only cut one half." We both laugh at the idea.

"I volunteer." Autumn shouts later at the reaping. Her hair is now in a pixie cut, it looks really cool on her. She is then asked her name.

"Autumn."

"Now for the male tribute." Finally it's my opportunity.

"I volunteer." I've been waiting to say those words my whole life.


	38. Chapter 38

**Sorry it's quite short, I'm just glad I've got through the districts on the victory tour. It feels like forever. It also means that this story's almost at its end. Only two more chapters probably. At the start of each chapter now though, I'm going to say thank you to a couple of people individually for the reviews you left me. I'll start with earlier reviews in this chapter.**

 **Singlewave I'm starting with you. You were the very first person to review. I think to ever review on any of my stories, so a big thank you to you. You left a couple near the start, and I wasn't sure if anyone was reading any of my stories because I wasn't getting reviews, but you helped me carry on writing, and as of now I have 35 reviews on this story, meaning this story alone has more reviews than all my others added up. So a huge thank you for those two reviews, you haven't left any since the 2** **nd** **chapter, so I don't know if you're still reading this, but if you are, thank you, and please leave me a review to let me know you're still reading. I love it when people stick with me from the start.**

 **My second thank you today is Abby:**

 **You only left me one review and a tribute but I still feel you deserve a special mention. The review you left was pretty short, but it was lovely. I really needed it as well. I was having a really bad day and was really upset about something, and it just made my day. It was just one of those small things that you can't stop smiling about. That day, you brought sunshine to my darkness, and for that I feel you deserve a special mention. So once again thank you.**

 **Also just before I add this chapter I just want to mention that I'm going to start a SYOT about what the games if there had been a capitol games after the rebellion. I've messaged a couple of you who've left reviews already, and if you do want to, I ask you send two in, a male and female, so they can be from the same 'districts' just so my life is easier when I'm grouping them. If you're interested, leave a review or PM me and I'll send a copy of the form.**

 **As usual hope you enjoy.**

 **Chapter 36**

The female tribute's parents are wearing quite shabby clothes and are thin. They don't look like the typical career's family.

 **Autumn's POV**

I go straight downstairs when I wake up this morning. I don't want to waste any training time. My hair is in a huge knot and my mum sighs.

"I wish we could get it cut." Hairdressers are expensive, so I can't go much. I can't even remember the last time I went. I'm lucky I don't get split ends though. We don't struggle that much for money, I mean I take tesserae for the three of us, but I live in a career district. If I get reaped, someone'll volunteer for me. Well, except this year, I'm the chosen female tribute for 2, so I am the one volunteering. That's why we're quite poor, my parents pay for me to train at the academy, so I can win and we don't have to worry about money.

"Well, see you." I say, in my training t-shirt, leggings and trainers a while later. I sling my bag with deodorant, change of clothes and water bottle in on my back and walk across to the training centre, it's a good half an hour walk from my house and when I go through the doors Alex appears behind me, panting slightly because he ran to catch up with me. Alex and I have been friends ever since he saw me at my first day at the academy when I was struggling with throwing knives. The next day he saw some kids laughing at my shoes at school and yelled at them. We've been friends ever since. He's only a year older than me, but it often feels like we're the same age.

"Hey." He smiles.

"Oh, hi." I'm slightly surprised, he's normally here earlier than me. "You ready for today?"

"I was born ready." He grins with arrogance. "You?"

"Of course." He follows me as I walk to my locker, and put my bag in. I then tie my ridiculously long hair back.

"What are you going to do today?" He asks me.

"I just want to do some running, get my physical health up, you know?" I reply, I've been concentrating on physical health recently, they'll have all the weapons I want in the Capitol so there's not much point focusing on that.

"I think I'll join you." He says, he always does. We both set the treadmills up and start jogging. My hair soon falls into "You should probably get it cut." He says. You think?

"I know, my parents can't afford it though." I say, I'm a bit nervous about telling him about my financial situation.

"Come with me." He says. I don't want to take his money, my hair's not that bad, I could probably get my stylist to cut it in the Capitol.

"Where to?" I ask suspiciously.

"My mum's place. She'll give you one for free." He can't do that. He hates her because she left him when he was young.

"But you hate her."

"Exactly, she'd do anything for me to forgive her." He says "So a free haircut for my mate is nothing." Basically he's taking advantage of her. That is a very Alex thing to do.

"Are you sure?" I ask, stopping the treadmill.

"I wouldn't have suggested it otherwise." He says. This is why Alex is my friend, he's so nice.

"As long as you don't get into a screaming argument with her while she's halfway through cutting it" I laugh "I don't want her to only cut one half." We both laugh at the idea.

"Hey Alex." His mum seems surprised to see him. "Who's your friend?"

"Autumn. Can you give her a haircut? Her family struggle for money, so she hasn't had one in years?" He says, he doesn't sound happy about seeing her. I feel bad about making him feel like he has to speak to him.

"Of course." She smiles "How do you want it?" I shrug.

"Maybe a pixie cut." I say.

"That'll look wonderful." She says, she sounds way to enthusiastic. "How are you these days?" She asks Alex.

"I'm fine." He mutters "I'm volunteering this year."

"You always loved the games." She says. "What do you like doing Autumn?" She asks me, pointing me to a seat and picking some scissors up.

"Training." I say "I'm volunteering too."

"Oh." She's obviously surprised.

"I volunteer." I shout as the escort takes the female slip out of the reaping bowl.

"What's your name?" She asks me.

"Autumn." I say. I try looking for Alex in the crowd. I don't see him until he shouts.

"I volunteer." He looks proud.


	39. Chapter 39

**Just a warning now, this chapter does contain rape, if this kind of thing triggers you, I wouldn't suggest reading it. It's not very explicit, it's more the situation and stuff that makes it a trigger point.**

 **Anyway, I have two more people I want to say thank you to today.**

 **Lmklein20account2 I'll start with you. At first we didn't seem eye to eye, and you flamed about the way I decided to write this story, but you kept with me. I wasn't sure whether you would keep reading or not, but I guess you did because I got a review after I wrote more about your characters you left a review apologising for flaming and said that you liked the way I portrayed your characters. Not everyone would have stuck with me, so thank you for that. I know I probably would have stopped reading. I also want to say thank you for letting me know you were still reading, I wasn't sure if you would, and the fact that you were really encouraged me, so thank you.**

 **My next thank you is to I believe in nargles too. You've left me a few reviews, just short ones telling me what you thought of the character and stuff like that. You did also leave an angry review about the way I was writing it because it was a SYOT. And I also want to thank you for staying with me and leaving me reviews that just let me know that you weren't giving up on this fic.**

 **Huge thank you to both of you. Next chapter will probably be the last one.**

 **Chapter 39**

I've only got the Capitol party left now. The worst part of the tour is over now. I have a feeling this part is just going to be boring. Saying hello to people, telling them it's an honour to meet them, have people telling me that they are so sorry about my brother.

"You can just relax now, Sapphire, you deserve this party." Stella, who hasn't really said anything to me since the start of the tour, says. I stand up and slap her. Hard.

"By watching my brother commit suicide so I could be on this train?" I scream, tears are streaming down my face "By watching him feel like he has to make sure I ended up here. Even though I only ever wanted him to survive." I want to murder her. She looks shocked.

"I-I –I didn-" She falters "I didn't mean. I just." I push straight past her and go to my room. Why did she think she have the right to say that? Why? She doesn't know what it's like to be in the arena. I don't get why I volunteered anymore. I wanted fame. I just wish I hadn't now. But there's nothing I can do about it. I wish someone would chuck people from the Capitol into the games, let them see how it feels. I pick up a pencil. Drawing's the only thing that distracts me these days. I channel my anger into my pictures, my hurt into the shading, my sadness into the lines.

"That's beautiful." I crumple it up.

"Go away." It's private, I don't want anyone else seeing it.

"I can't." I turn around. It's Teal. I guess they need him to make me look pretty for when I arrive in the Capitol. "It's time to get you dolled up."

"Woop-de-do." I mutter sarcastically.

"Come on, it's only one last time." He says as we walk down the train to my styling room. I sit down on the chair in the middle of the room and let my prep team do their work.

Soon my hair is lathered in some kind gel and I am sitting in only a white flimsy dressing gown. I hate this process. It takes so long and I can't move much. I don't even know what all this stuff does. Makes my skin shiny I guess. It's stupid, people are starving in the districts and they're just putting a load of soaps, creams and gels on me to make me look shinier. I wonder if it's always been like this. The poor working for the rich. The poor getting poorer and the rich getting richer. I hope not.

My outfit is interesting. I'm not really sure how to describe it otherwise. I don't really know if I like it. They've put these like prosthetic black feather wings on my back. They tell me once I put water on wear they've kind of welded them into my back they'll come straight off but I'm not convinced. They're really uncomfortable, and my back's sore where they are attached. My dress is short, tight and sexy. It comes down to just above my knees and is black. Why black? Teal says it's to show I'm still in mourning for my brother. Like what does that even mean? I don't believe in black to a funeral. Carter never did either. My hair is black and piled up in a loose bun. My lips are black and I have smoky grey eye shadow. I look like a sexy version of how I imagine death to be. If death was a person I mean. I don't think many people would mind coming with me if I was death anyway. Especially if they were from the Capitol. For a few minutes in my presence they probably would die. They're dumb like that.

"Perfect." Stella walks in, clasping her hands together as Teal tucks a black rose behind my ear. I ignore Stella. She still hasn't apologised. "Now, we will pull into the station and get straight into a car that will take us straight there. There shouldn't be anyone at the station as it's the president's private one, but we do occasionally get people sneaking in. When we get there, you just need to wander around, smile and chat to people. Some will ask you to dance too. Just remember to have a good time." She gives me a sickly sweet smile.

I walk to the end of the train and watch as we slow into a large underground station.

"Sapphire?" Rose calls as I stand, looking around for a moment.

"Yeah." I say.

"We have to get off now." I stand staring for a couple more seconds then look at her.

"How did you feel, when you were in my place?" I ask.

"I-I. I don't know." Rose stumbles "It was a completely different scenario. I was happy. I wanted all the attention. I loved every second of it."

"And now?"

"How do you mean?"

"How do you feel about it now, being in the spotlight."

"Tired." She looks worn out. In front of the camera she's always smiling and happy, but now, not so.

"Will it always be like this? Being the centre of attention." I look at her, I realise despite spending a lot of time with her, I don't know a lot about her.

"Yes. It's the curse of being a victor."

"Victor." I repeat "Winner. Survivor. Murderer." I whisper. It's all the same.

"You're only just being to understand. This is how to has to be now. We're all just play things of the Capitol. Do what Trusta asks though." A tear spills down her cheek "Just do it. If you love anyone. Do it for them. She kills them otherwise."

"What do you mean?" I ask. She wipes the tear away.

"We have to go." A new expression comes over her face. She's put her public face on. "We've already spent too long talking." I don't press her, I wonder what she means though.

"Sapphire Glart." A tall man walks up to me with President Trusta later at the party. "What an honour."

"Hello." I smile, holding a hand out for him. "Same to you." It's not really but I have to pretend.

"Sorry, I just need to speak to you alone, Miss Glart, you can talk afterwards though." President Trusta glares at me.

"Of course." He smiles, wanders off and starts eating some of one of the many delicious delicacies they are handing around.

"Miss Glart, I have an offer for you." She smiles. This is probably what Rose was warning me about. "In return for the well-being of your friend Miss Zoey Slater, I suggest you do as I say." I stare at her. "This offer is made to every erm. Let me think of the right word. Desirable, tribute. Half the Capitol want to sleep with you."

"And?" Can't he get straight to the point.

"Some, like the gentleman you just met, are willing to pay quite a bit of money for your, ah, services."

"What do you mean?" I think I've worked it out already, but she can't really be asking me to do that.

"I think we both know quite well Miss Glart. Now, in return for keeping your friends and family safe, go over and do what he wants."

"I-." I falter, I don't know what to do.

"I suggest you do it, I'm not bluffing. Your mentor Rose Taling, is proof of that." That's why she warned me.

"You won't touch anyone I love." She shakes her head. "How often?"

"As often as is required."

"Fine, but if you hurt one, just one, of them. The deal's over." I say. I can't believe I'm doing this, but I don't want anyone else to die for my freedom.

"Miss Glart, the president has prepared a special room for us." The man smiles as I return to him. He takes my wrist and pulls me along. In the room is a huge bed. The covers are neat and pure white. I doubt they are going to be so tidy when we leave. "The president said it was fine to remove your wings." He said, running his fingers along the zip of my dress. I take a step back. I'm not sure I'm ready for this. He takes two steps closer and pushes me against the wall. He unzips my dress and pulls it down. "Come on." He shows me to the en suite and starts running cold water over my back. The wings of feathers fall to the floor.

"What now?" I say. I hope it won't go much further.

"Onto the bed." I go back and lay on my back, waiting for him. It doesn't take long. His disgusting fingers crawl up my back, unhook my bra. Then he starts the kissing. All over. My neck, shoulders, breasts. I try to wriggle away, but he holds on tighter "Don't." He whispers. His hands go further down. Down to my underwear. He flicks them down my legs and pulls them off "That's much better." He looks at me, laying naked. I think he is going to take it further.

He pulls off his clothes and lays on top of me. Kissing, until, after what seems like an eternity, he finally does it.

"Ah." I gasp. I wasn't expecting it to be so. I don't know. I hate it though. The way he smiles as if he's not some kind of disgusting animal. He kisses me some more. I want to slap him, put my clothes back on and run out. But I can't, for Zoey. As he puts more in, I wriggle away.

"Shhh." He whispers. Stroking my hair. "Calm down. I'm going gentle." I hate him.

After what feels like the whole night, he finally stops and puts his clothes on. "Pretty good for a first timer." He's sick. "Get dressed and enjoy the rest of the party." With that he leave. I don't come out. Not for a few minutes. I sit on the cold hard floor and rock myself back and forwards, trying to comfort myself. Maybe it'll be easier next time. I pick my bra and knickers up and put them back on. I walk through to the bathroom to put the dress on. My feathery wings are still laying on the floor. There's no way I can reattach them.

I feel like a bird. Trapped. I was starting to heal, but now, they've cut my wings. I can't fly anywhere. I'm stuck. A prisoner. Another word to add to my long list of words to describe me, a victor. A winner. A survivor. A murderer. A prisoner. A prostitute. That's what I've become. To protect those I love. I just hope it gets easier.

"I don't know about you, but that was amazing." Stella says when we're back on the train heading for 1 later. I spent the rest of the night, dancing eating, smiling. Pretending everything's okay.

"I'm tired." I say, and head to my room.

"Did you agree?" Rose comes in. I nod.

"Does it get any easier?" She shrugs.

"Sometimes, sometimes it feels like it's getting better, but then, you just have one person who reminds you. Reminds you what you're up against."

"Who did she kill?" I ask, she told me Rose didn't comply at first.

"Everyone."

"I'm sorry."

"So am I. I still ended up doing it anyway. Resistance is futile." She leaves and I curl up and sleep. For once, the nightmares leave me alone. And when I wake up, I realise why. My life has become worse than the nightmares. The nightmares don't scare me anymore. The real world does.

 **Just checked the word count for this chapter and it's probably the longest one so far. Next chapter will probably be that long too. I just wanted to add a couple of questions for you guys to answer in the reviews about this chapter because it was a pretty powerful one (I felt when I was writing it anyway)**

 **1\. Would you have done the same thing in Sapphire's situation?**

 **2\. How do you think people in the districts would react if they found out about what happens to the 'desirable' victors?**

 **Anyway, hope you enjoyed, and please let me know what you think.**


	40. Chapter 40

**It feels so satisfying now I can hit the complete button on this fic. I'm not sure if I should do a short fic afterwards to tie up any loose ends, it probably won't be until the summer holidays start, but what do you guys think?**

 **My final thank you to specific reviewers is Redwut. Where to start? You've been amazing, almost every single time I've checked the reviews after an update I found a lovely one from you. You're so encouraging and whenever I've had a bad case of writer's block, you're reviews are what helps me carry on. Thank you so much.**

 **I also want to say thank you to everyone who sent in a tribute, whether I used them or not. I loved reading the details about them and weaving the backstories into it.**

 **So, for the final time, I would love it if you would leave one last review, telling me what you think and I hope you enjoy it.**

 **Chapter 40**

"Hey Zoey." I smile as I get into the house. The cameras have finally left me alone and I can live in peace. For a while. I have to pretend everything's okay though. I can't let Zoey know.

"Hi." She says "I've just been making some cookies, do you want some." I nod, I wasn't hungry at breakfast and I only had a small hunk of bread at lunch. Maybe I just need something sweet. "How was it?" She asks, giving me two warm cookies. I shrug.

"I'm just glad it's over. Maybe they'll leave us in peace now." I say, I know they won't leave me in peace, but then no one knows about that.

"I wasn't sure if you wanted me to clean the attic while you were away because you don't like me going in there, so it's a bit dusty." She says when I head for the stairs.

"Thank you." I say, I like to keep that room private. I unpack my bags, there's not much, just my art stuff. I ended up doing tonnes of pictures while I was away. I pin them all up on my walls with the rest. There's only room for one more now. This one will be different though.

I pick up a blunt pencil and start drawing onto some canvas. When I'm finally happy with the outcome I pick up my water colour paints. I paint well into the night. It needs to be perfect. It has to be.

"Goodnight." Zoey says outside my door "I wasn't sure if you wanted anything to eat, so I just left some stew on the side."

"Thanks." I say, I'm not sure if I'll eat it yet though. I've been trying to decide while I've been painting. I really don't know. Is life worth living now I'm just trapped? I don't really think so anymore. I thought if I volunteered everything would be okay. Now, now I've realised that when the victor comes out of the arena, they never really do. They're always trapped there. The events going round and round in their heads forever more. Being forced to do the Capitol's bidding. It's not really living at all. I'm starting to be glad that Carter didn't win. Maybe by him committing suicide he, unknowingly, protected himself from worse horrors to come. I don't know if I can go on living in this cage, this arena forever though. I can't help feeling I did the right thing killing those people in the arena now. They can't be in a worse position than me now, can they?

I wonder what there is after death? People are afraid of it, I don't understand why. I'm not afraid of dying, I went into the arena meaning to come out as a corpse. Death is the one thing that human beings can always depend on. It gets us all in the end. Death is the one certain thing in everyone's life. People are so afraid of it, some think we're judged for what we did in this life and that decides where we go next. A bad place or a good place. Some believe you're reborn into another body. I don't know what I believe, but I don't think death is something to be afraid of. It's just a stage of life and sometimes it comes for people sooner than others.

I need fresh air. I put on my coat and boots and go outside. It's snowing. The snow is fresh and crisp. It crunches under my feet. I am the first person to walk on it. The moon illuminates the snow beautifully. I think I just came out side for a walk, but I find myself knocking at Rose's house. She answers.

"Do you want to come in?" She asks. I nod. She leads me to the living room. "What's up?" I shrug.

"I just need to chat to someone." I reply.

"What about?"

"I-I'm not sure." I say, I am, but I think she may try to stop me. "Have you ever thought about ending it?"

"Yes." She says immediately.

"Why don't you?"

"I-I don't want them to think they've beaten me. Why?" She asks.

"I'm not sure I can carry on." I say.

"That doesn't make you weak though." She says "You've just been through worse than most. What's stopping you though?"

"Zoey. If I die, she will have to move back into her parents' house." I say "They abuse her."

"And her life is worth more than yours?" She says.

"I'd feel guilty."

"She's not your family though."

"I feel like I owe it to Carter." I say.

"I can take care of her. I mean, I don't really know how to, but I can feed her and give her a roof over her head." She offers. Thank you. I can die in peace. At rest with the world.

"Would you?"

"I'm not going anywhere, and I should have warned you before you volunteered." She replies.

"Thank you."

"I guess this is it." She says. She reaches for a hug.

"Thank you," I say "For everything."

"It's okay." She whispers. I can feel my shoulder getting wet where her head is resting on it while we embrace. I don't mind. Her shoulder's getting the same from me.

"Stay strong." I say "Do what I can never do." We pull apart.

"I'll try." She wipes a tear away "You're the first person to really understand what I go through."

"And you were for me." I say. "I always wanted to win, and now I just wish I hadn't volunteered."

"I know." She leads me out "I'll see you, some day."

"Yeah, I'll save you a place in hell with me." I smile.

"Nah, I reckon we deserve better than that." She tries to give me a weak smile.

"I'm going wherever Carter is." I say "Even if I have to live a hundred more lives to do it."

"Maybe we'll meet again. In one of those hundred lives."

"I'd like that." I say. I just wish I could do more to help her.

I walk back to my house. I know what I have to do now. I take a pen and some paper and write a note. I put it in the kitchen for Zoey to find in the morning. Zoey's strong. She'll get through this. I take a piece of rope from the shed in the garden and start tying. My fingers are nimble and it doesn't take long. I secure it to the ceiling and make sure it's strong enough to hold me. Then I push my chair under it and climb up. I put my head through the noose and kick the chair away. I hope someone brings the Capitol down soon. Someone strong enough. Stronger than I am.

Around my room are all the pictures I've done since the arena. All of the same person. Carter. From his childhood, in training, the arena. Almost every memory I could think of.

I can feel it's about to happen. I open my eyes one last time. Carter is here. Not the pictures, but him in flesh.

"Hey big sis." He smiles, and pulls me from my body into the next life.


End file.
